...like just running?
I'm adopted and my real parents don't want anything to do with me, and neither does my adoptive mother. Long story...
I wish I had a family, and while I'm getting married in four weeks, I feel that I should be a better person and not have all this trouble for my fiance to deal with.
I wish I had a parent who wants to give me away, but I don't and I feel childish for wanting more people on the "brides side of the church".
Am I being selfish for feeling sorry for myself?
2007-02-22 16:04:32 · 6 answers · asked by toe_jam_on_toast 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It is normal to want a family. Especially at this special time in your life. It is a celebration of family. You shouldn't feel childish for wanting what you don't have at this point in your life.
Your fiance is marrying you....not your history or your estranged family. If he couldn't or wasn't willing to deal with it then you wouldn't be getting married.
You can't help who you were born to, or what family you were raised by, but you can control who you surround yourself with as you get older. I have found that the friends I have made over the years are more dear to me and there for me far more than my "family" has ever been. They are, for all intents and purpose, and have become my family. And frankly, I am better for having them in my life. Surround yourself with people you care about and who care about you and live your life happily.
Best wishes and Congrats on your up-coming marriage!
2007-02-22 18:45:24 · answer #1 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have to do your best with the cards you have been dealt in life. Everyone feels like running from time to time the only hitch is that no matter how far and how fast you run your still right there with you, all of your problems come along for the ride. I jog 5 days a week and in a way that's my little escape from it all. Your wedding isn't about how many is on each side its about you and the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, don't let the worry ruin what could be one of the best days of your life. This is a new start and a chance for you to start a family of your own, you shouldn't allow your past problems to hold you down into the future. Congrats on the marriage, we should all be so lucky.
2007-02-23 00:13:30 · answer #2 · answered by NoMaD! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really dont know that you can do anything about your family because they are your family. They are who they are.
But dont worry by marrying your guy you will start a new family and believe me your soon to be husband and you are not going to be focusing on your adopted parents you are going to be focusing on your own new family.
So my guess is that you wont be able to change your parents or who they are so just keep in mind that they are your family but no longer the most important person in your life-It is now your husband.
If your adopted parents are that bad and you realize it im sure you arnt anything like them so if the subject comes up talk about it but don't worry your husband knows you- and he loves you he married you for you not your parents. It probably wont make a difference who they are to him. If your parents are being annoying and making trouble for you just tell them that.
2007-02-23 00:15:32 · answer #3 · answered by Syann M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not being selfish, these feeling are all normal. just work through them at your own pace with your fiance, that's what he is there for. It doesn't matter how many people are on your side of the church as long as they are supportive.
2007-02-23 00:09:33 · answer #4 · answered by j3zZiKa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems like it's your way of cold feet before the wedding
just relax and have faith that things will be great
you are starting a new life with your hubby -to-be, and I'm sure his side understands where you're coming from and will welcome you as part of their dysfunctional family, cuz all families are somewhat messed up
but enjoy your big day and it will be your family who feel regret by not helping with your day, shame on them, they sound like real scumbags
2007-02-23 00:09:56 · answer #5 · answered by onemark1966 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no your crazy to think that your selfish.....
i think its better to let go and to look forward to your future with your future husband!!!!!!
hopefully everything goes great
take care God bless :)
2007-02-23 02:11:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋