Ok, I have liked this guy since forever, and we finally started being boyfriend and girlfriend. It's just that... for some reason, even though I love this, I feel kind of worried, like this is going too fast. We have only been dating for a day now, and he asks me if he can call me names like "sweetie". I don't even know I'm ready for that yet. Yes, this is my first boyfriend. What should I do?
2007-02-22 12:03:57 · 38 answers · asked by nobody 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hi Masha!
This is the first dating experience for each of you, so you're both learning about feelings, friendship, intimacy and real love. It feels good feel attractive to someone else.
Relationships take time and experience to grow. At first there is attraction and infatuation, and it feels intense. But those feelings eventually fade, as is natural, as your relationship matures.
You seem to value growing into friendship and not into such intimacy yet, but your boyfriend is confusing infatuation for intimacy.
Calling you names like "sweetie" is rather intimate and it presume that you have a deeper relationship, that you don't yet have. Your relationship doesn't yet have a foundation in anything yet, other than attraction.
My suggestion is for you to talk with your boyfriend and tell him that though you like him, you want to go slowly and that you want to develop a friendship with him first. It's from friendship that real love can develop. See what he says. If he agrees, then there's hope that he respects you and values you as a person. If not, then he's not ready for a relationship, and it'll be very awkward for you to be in one with him.
Good luck!
2007-02-22 12:17:30 · answer #1 · answered by Joe_D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I wouldn't worry too much about being called sweetie, hell I call most of my female friends that and I am not dating any of them. Sometimes I think we build up our wanting to date someone so much that if and when it actually happens we are left wondering what next. Because it is easy to like someone and to think it all through in our heads, but when it becomes reality we just don't know what to do about it.
2007-02-22 12:08:40 · answer #2 · answered by tattooed_and_pierced_countryboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since this is your first boyfriend you are probably pretty young and probably so is he> He probably has been watching to many movies or trying to act like he is all that without knowing anything about dating or relationships.
Just set him straight by talking to him. If he doesn't listen, well better to find out in the first day or two then weeks or months later.
2007-02-22 12:10:57 · answer #3 · answered by wknightf3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems that you are worried that the relationship will fall very quickly and you guys arent taking it slow......
Well don't worry let everything flow, sometimes when you worry too much you don't enjoy what you have and always will have too many questions that will just affect you relationship.....
Communication is the best way , I mean talk to this guy about what you are feeling , because you and him are the only one who can put a solution on your relationship
Enjoy, and if passion slips away, remember that you have to be strong and make passion appear again
byebye
2007-02-22 12:09:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple just tell him you want to slow things down because you feel like the relationship is going too fast and your not comfortable with it.
2007-02-22 12:07:32 · answer #5 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him if its natural for him to call you sweetie then its ok. You should be comfortable with pet names if you knew each other well enough to start dating...
2007-02-22 12:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by Nickythewire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with going by names like sweety, so long as you're going steady. It helps to show your affection towards the other.
2007-02-22 12:08:56 · answer #7 · answered by Joel V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about it. Communication is the first step in having a healthy relationship, I know you may not be with this guy for very long, but at least use this as practice. You have to talk to him and if he understands then you know hes a good guy for you.
2007-02-22 12:07:41 · answer #8 · answered by Fluffington Cuddlebutts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him that you don't feel comfortable with that yet. Everytime you think, it is too early to take a step, tell him outright. Actually two individuals take time to adjust to each other's values, ideals, thoughts and pace and communicating frankly and clearly can help them understand each other much more and faster.
2007-02-22 12:08:25 · answer #9 · answered by Smriti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make compromises. That's what keeps a relationship together longest. State your case, keep an open mind. Be open to changes. It's your first boyfriend. Just be aware it will most likely not be your last.
2007-02-22 12:07:44 · answer #10 · answered by ChaiTea 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋