What were the Buddha's views on divorce?

Answer 1

In regards to your question Buddhism does not directly speak about marriage or divorce and does not place the social stigmas upon it that you find elsewhere. Though there may be social stigmas in the society where it is practiced it is not something handed down by Buddhist practice. Since Buddhism is concerned with self- awakening and self -accountability it would place the onus upon the individual in the marriage to do whatever is best for the marriage. One would have to take seriously their marriage vow and commit to do their utmost to make it workable but if it is detrimental to the individuals well being then one should also consider that divorce might be best for all. To remain in a relationship that is self- destructive does no one any good so to be committed for the sake of commitment is foolish. On the other hand one should not take their commitments lightly and learn to develop their character in a relationship and not run from their problems. In either scenario one must take a deep and critical look at their situation and commit themselves to resolving their problems in a way that is not selfish or self serving but views the entire relationship.
Failure is a part of life. We learn more from our failures than our successes for the most part. Failure to see failure is perhaps the biggest problem of all. If we keep trying to force an issue that is not going to work it is very self defeating. We all must live with some regrets in our life but the regret should be a guideline for the future and not an anchor to our past.
I hope this helps you.

Answer 2

In Theravada Buddhism divorce (like marriage) is regarded as a civil matter, rather than a religious or spiritual one. I don't know of any suttas in which the Buddha expresses an opinion about divorce. The Buddha did, however, have some suggestions about how a couple should behave while they are married (see DN 31).

For some observations on how divorce is understood in Sri Lanka, see The Position of Women in Buddhism, by Dr. (Mrs.) L.S. Dewaraja. For more about marriage in general, see A Happy Married Life: A Buddhist Perspective, by K. Sri Dhammananda.

Answer 3

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Buddhism allows each individual the freedom to decide for himself all the issues pertaining to marriage. It might be asked why Buddhist monks do not marry, since there are no laws for or against marriage. The reason is obviously that to be of service to mankind, the monks have chosen a way of life which includes celibacy. Those who renounce the worldly life keep away from married life voluntarily to avoid various worldly commitments in order to maintain peace of mind and to dedicate their lives solely to serve others in the attainment of spiritual emancipation. Although Buddhist monks do not solemnize a marriage ceremony, they do perform religious services in order to bless the couples.

Divorce

Separation or divorce is not prohibited in Buddhism "though the necessity would scarcely arise if the Buddha's injunctions were strictly followed." Men and women must have the liberty to separate if they really cannot agree with each other. Separation is preferable to avoid miserable family life for a long period of time. The Buddha further advises old men not to have young wives as the old and young are unlikely to be compatible, which can create undue problems, disharmony and downfall (Parabhava Sutta).

A society grows through a network of relationships which are mutually inter-twined and inter-dependent. Every relationship is a whole hearted commitment to support and to protect others in a group or community. Marriage plays a very important part in this strong web of relationships of giving support and protection. A good marriage should grow and develop gradually from understanding and not impulse, from true loyalty and not just sheer indulgence. The institution of marriage provides a fine basis for the development of culture, a delightful association of two individuals to be nurtured, and to be free from loneliness, deprivation and fear. In marriage, each partner develops a complementary role, giving strength and moral courage to one another, each manifesting a supportive and appreciative recognition of the other's skills. There must be no thought of either man or woman being superior -- each is complementary to the other, a partnership of equality, excluding Patience, Compassion, Gentleness, Generosity, Peace of Mind, and Dedication.

Answer 4

Promiscuity would be frowned upon as sexual misconduct but an ongoing relationship between two people, either within or outside of marriage would be considered moral conduct. As one of the essential Buddhist teachings is that everything is impermanent and subject to change, the irrevocable breakdown of a relationship between a couple would be understood in this light, so divorce would not be considered improper.

Answer 5

Buddhism doesn't get specific about the concept of marriage and divorce. Whatever does not cause harm or suffering and makes logical sense is what's best. Marriage and divorce are mental concepts and constructs which have only whatever meaning the perceiver gives it, so therefore such concepts rate just about the same as any other concept, logically.

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