Need advice on renting to a friend?

Question

I'm 26 and purchased my first condo not too long ago. There's a separate entrance so I turned that into an apartment. A friend of mine / ex co worker recently informed me that she's near homelessness because she' has to find a place to live ASAP..Here's the thing, she has a track record when it comes to renting, she's rented 2 different apartments before and she bailed on both when it came to paying the rent, she just packed up and left.. I think one of them ended up taking her to court.. Would I be a bad friend if I told her no..She promises' to pay rent- but I've never rented to anyone before so I have no idea how this works- the friend in me wants to help her out, but then again, I dont wanna end up how her previous landlord's ended up.. My mom told me to nicely tell her NO and leave it at that.. I guess the nice part of me will feel badly if she's out there on the street..but then I dont wanna be a fool & rent to her knowing her record..what should I do??? Serious answers only plz

She's 45 and I would think by now that she has enough common sense to know that you don't just rent an apartment and then just bail when you're tired of paying the rent..

Yea I think you're all right...the previous apartment she had, my mom is on the board of directors, and she (my mom) was nice enough to get her an apartment.. otherwise she would have been on a waiting list.. and she bailed on that one too..they ended up serving her with an eviction notice.

Answer 1

You are not going to win on this one. Since you know her track record, you do know what is going to happen. you just want someone to validate your thoughts. Well, you just got one. she is going to be pissed off when you tell her "no". Tell her this has nothing to do with your friendship, but I'm telling ya, she is going to play the guilt trip, AND don't let her do it! If she is 45 and hasn't gotten her S_ _ _ together by now, You are not the one to help her. I hate to say this but people like that can be manipulative and know how to pull all the right strings to make you feel bad. You have worked hard to get what you have. You don't owe anyone an explanation. There is a reason she is where she is in life. Some times a person has to hit rock bottom before they see the light. Then some never do. If she is really homeless tell her you can help her with calling women's shelters( Why don't her other friends help her, or has she gone through them already?). They help women who really want to better themselves by giving them shelter and training for a job so she can support herself.
I did try to help someone and her two kids, I finally had to basically throw them out. She found her own place. She told me several months later it was the best thing I could've done for her. Make her stand on her own two feet. You can't do that for her, only she can.

Answer 2

She sounds irresponsible. I wouldn't rent to her for the simple fact that she has a bad track record. Don't feel obligated because she is almost homeless. The way I look at it, its not your problem and she is old enough to take care of her own issues. Its sounds like she would bail out out on you sooner or later too if you give her the opportunity. Seriously, go with your gut feeling and don't it. Like I said earlier, you don't owe her anything. Its nice to know you have a big heart, but some folks take other's kindness as a weakness. I'm known to be a big sucker too, but I have grown a backbone throughout the years.

Answer 3

This same prinicple applies when "loaning money" to family and friends.

If you loan money or an apartment to the friend expect to end up with neither money, nor the friend at the end of the ordeal.

Maybe I should hit All Caps with the word ORDEAL.

Either you are a business person here or you are giving out charity; you can't do both. Give the apartment to this person and not get paid, then have to deal with the eviction process, which is going to be very painful and difficult.

suggest renting the movie "Pacific Heights" with Michael Keaton, than decide.

Answer 4

I'd give her a wide berth unless she came up with a significant deposit, maybe like 4-6 month's rent, and specifiy in writing what the terms of her stay would be. This means that if she bails or stops paying rent you are protected somewhat....... and if you tell her you need the funds up front, and she can't afford it, well that's an easy out for you. You are sweet and compassionate to even consider this issue but you need to put your own best interests first.

Answer 5

If you don't want to be taken for a ride, insist on a lease. Actually, technically this is for the benefit of both of you.

If she does not pay rent or damages the apartment, you need to serve her immediately with her notice to vacate. Then if she doesn't, you can get the police involved.

Talk to her about your concerns. If all she has to say is, "Well, if you don't want to rent to me, don't rent to me," take her advice. However, if she says she has learned from her past problems and is trying to turn her life around, then think about it - but not without a lease. And, based on her history, a hefty deposit.

Good luck!

Answer 6

No, I would not. One because she has a history of bailing on the rent. So think of what she will do to you. She will probably through your friendship in your face everyime she does not have the rent. Then you will destroy the friendship for real. My advice is to listen to your mother and tell her no, or that you are renting it to someone else, and advise your friend to stay with a family member or something

Answer 7

Do not rent to her!!

People like this, who have a history of this kind of thinking will not change.
You are a easy target to her and this is how she will treat you. As your mother said nicely say no. It will make you feel bad when she starts in on the I have no place to go BS. If you want to help her out let her crash on your couch. This way no money is going to be exchanged.

Answer 8

I have to agree with everyone here. Don't mess up the friendship, cuz it is bound to go bad. You already know how she is, do not put yourself through the drama. Offer to help her find a place, just not yours. It is a tough decision (being a friend and all) but I don't think it is a good idea. I had a friend living with me once, and it ended very bad.

Answer 9

If you are going to be relying on the rental income to make your mortgage payment, then your answer is clear. Business has got to come first... friend or no friend.

If however, the extra money from the rent is not really necessary for you, it would not hurt you to be charitable and take a chance on helping a friend, assuming she is a close friend.

Answer 10

She already had someone help her from a state of "almost homelessness" (your mom) before so that she wasn't on a waiting list, so that shows that even if you try to help her out, you will end up getting sh*t on. Say that you found someone who seems to need it more than her,. and rent to a newlywed couple or a small family.