just found out......what should i do?

Question

There is this woman that I have been in love with. I never really told her how I feel because the timing just wasn’t right. For example we met while she and her husband were fighting which pretty much ended in them becoming legally separated. Even though they were separated he never left the house. As time went on she and I became real close I started to have feelings for her but I still never really acted on them. The more and more time we spent together I began to want to be with her and just I was began to feel this way her husband left and took almost everything. So I thought again I should just look past my feels and just be a friend. So some time past we continued hang and by this time I fell in love with her. The thing is I know she only saw me as a friend and I felt that maybe with some time I would be able to get over her. I’m still not over her
And just today I found out that she is seeing somebody. It’s really killing me. I didn’t even think about her seeing other people and how it would make me feel, if I knew I would feel like this I would of gladly ended are friendship like other people suggested. Well I think it’s a little too late for that. So I was wondering what I can do to deal with this?

i probably should have metino this early. but for the past few months she has been shutting me out and im not sure why so i really dont know how she feels

Answer 1

At some point, if she's supposed to be the one you have to let her know. If the friendship is worth more than the love, don't even go there.

If she's a good friend, she'll be able to say no and still have you as a friend. If there's doubt, don't ask.

Answer 2

You have pretty much two options, you can keep your mouth shut, swallow the lump in your throat and remain friends if you love her you should be happy that she is happy or I think a better thing you can do is try and woo her with a sweet, romantic gesture like write her a song or sweet poem from the heart and sing/read it to her or send her a dozen red roses with a card confessing your love for her, point is telling her is not that bad of an idea, at least she'll know and have a chance to perhaps have the best relationship she's ever had, maybe she's been feeling the same way too about you all along. What is the worst thing that can happen? I think it already has happened so you need to cease this moment immediately

Answer 3

Holy crap are you in a mess. I have seen this time and time again. I realize that you are stuck in trying to get what you want and being respectful of the woman you love. the only issue I see is the fact that you are going after a woman who is not in love with you. If she were, you would be together already. Am I right? Sorry kiddo, you gotta jump ship and find a reciprocating relationship. She needs to do a ton of searching before she is ready to give the real deal again. And, you need to talk darlin. You need to say how you feel and not be afraid to ask for what you want. It's your life. Live it for you.... If you want you can tell her how you have been feeling for the past however long and take your chances on the outcome. I suggest you learn from this little incident and take away the fact that things don't turn out how you want them to by themselves. You must be active in the course of your life. Spend some time single. I know that sounds awful but, this is coming from a former serial relationship addict. I have been single after 2 years of a horrible marriage. I learned so much about who I am and how to love my life. I also have a much healthier veiw of the opposite sex and who the right person is for me. I'm currently on the search and it's so nice to take my time and not feel bad being single. Hope this helps...

Answer 4

Somehow I doubt her first relationship is going to last forever. Hang out see how it goes then after she has been single for a week or so, ask her out on a real date. Tell her that you would like to be more than friends. She can't read your mind and she won't know unless you tell her.

Answer 5

Its very hard but try to forget her as a girlfriend just a friend. Ma ke you feel better: friend last longer than girlfriend.

Answer 6

wait till she is single again and come out and tell her how you feel about her already! good luck.

Answer 7

move on and find yourself someone, maybe that will make her jealous.