How can I help my mom?

Question

Okay,I'm 21 years old.My sister's 30 & my brother's 28.Over the past 10 years my parents have been dealing with every thing you can think of with my brother & sister because they act irresponsibly.My brother's been in prison for about 2 years now.He's set to get out in a year,so my mom's worrying about trying to help him.She's been worrying really bad about my sister because of how she lives & treats her 3 kids.Yesterday my sister tried to overdose on pills & she's now been committed to a mental hospital by a physician.My sister's 3 children (ages 7,3, & 2 months) were just left at the house by themselves through this whole ordeal.A sheriff took my sister to the mental hospital which is about 2 hours away & just neglected to find anywhere for my nieces & nephew to go.Anyway,my mom has 2 of the children for an unknown amount of time.She seems really stressed,like she's about to have a breakdown.I work over 45 hours a week so I can't keep the kids all the time.How else could I help her?

Answer 1

I am very sorry for your troubles. There are agencies out there that can help. Get out your telephone book. Most cities have places that can help with food, medical care, etc. Maybe even a day care program that can help out during the day. That would give your mom some extra help. Don't be discouraged, they say God never gives us more than we can handle. Good Luck.

Answer 2

Wow, your family is in a tough situation. I'm really sorry. I wish I could have a better answer but here it goes....you sound like you're very busy yourself and therefore can't make a really big contribution to helping care for the kids. If they are the older kids perhaps your mom can put them into daycare so she can have some time for herself during the day. When you have time off it would probably mean a lot to your mom to watch the kids for even a couple hours or so. Maybe take them out to do something so she can rest a bit. That's all I can come up with given the circumstances, sorry for having no great solutions. Take care and good luck to your family.

Answer 3

every little bit helps. From what I read you don't live there so maybe at night you could go over and put the kids to bed for your mom, give them their bath, make dinner. If you are going grocery shopping ask your mom if she needs anything, or pick up the kids and take them with you to give your mom and hour or so. Go over and take the kids outside to play. Drive them to scool and pick them up when ever possible When you go over do the dishes or start a load of laundry. Every little bit helps. The 7 years old should be pretty self sufficient. So if that is one of the children that your mom has he could help out a little bit. By that I mean to clean up after himself. Well I hope that things get better for you and your family, and I hope that this helps. Take care

Answer 4

It sounds like your family is one that as a custom helps each other when something goes wrong. Your mom is trying to hold the family together and its tearing her apart. You yourself work alot, but what I can suggest is that if you want to help your mom and her stress level, then when your not working take the kids off her hands for a few hours, or for over night to give her a time to rest. As far as your brother is concerned, I don't know what she's trying to get together for him for his release, but remind her she doesn't have to do everything, ask her if you can help at all, and tell her that your brother needs to take responsibility for his life, and for making the right choices to stay out of prision. Talk and listen to her, but encourage her not to take on so much. She maybe a Super mom to your family, but she's still a person who needs to be reminded she can't do everything.
Somtimes a mom needs a good cry, so let her vent to you, it also may help her stress level.

Answer 5

Tell your mom you can not help who does not want to be helped. I know it is hard watching your child go down the wrong path. The thing is those poor children deserve the best. Is your mom able to take care of them. Maybe if not they could go to there father. Or maybe they could go to foster care. As for your brother have you seen or talked to him since went to Jail does he seem to have changed or does he talk and act the same way. If he does your mother would be better not trying to help him. let him go to a half way house. It seems like your mother is having as much as she can handle.

Though these are words to life by.
"GOD DOES NOT GIVE YOU MORE THEN YOU CAN HANDLE"

that was my mothers favorite quote and she went through Heck

Answer 6

Wow, you mom is kinda going through the same thing that we were going through with my sister. My sister did spend some time in a pschiatric ward facility and had to rehab from xanax and what not and she too has three kids. Her husband is not much of one. Henceforth to this point, my sister and her husband lost there home and now in an apartment. However it seems like they are in better finacial situations so hopefully they will find some stability. Well to stop beating around the bush, see if you can not contact a human rights center of something to that sort or depending if you live in US each state, county city has some type of family services. Perhaps they can provide aid to your mother to help with the children. Tell your mom as far as your brother it is not her responsibilty to take care of a grown man. Obviously he got himself in the mess and he is a grown up. I would tell him to figure it out. I would let him work his way back into the family. I understand your monthers love for a child as I am a mom but there has to be a cutoff point. He will continue his ways as well as your sister if your mom just doesnt' shut the door and tell them she has had enough. We hate to think of the children going into foster care, but if it is to much for your mom, you have to see what is best suitable? Perhaps some type of open adoption limited to who can visit them. Such as you and your mom only. There are plenty of options out there but definatly contact your family services and see what type of help can be provided. Good luck to you and your family!

Answer 7

Just show you love your mom and that you're willing to help her. Do your best, don't fall into the trap your siblings have. Your mother appreciates you more than you know already. Don't ever take your mom for granted.

Answer 8

Just do what has to be done, and what ever you all do dont let these children here this stuff. tell your mom to face it that she has got to raise these children until your sister comes to her scences, and just go own with life, no one can help someone unless that someone wants to help them self.your brother is a grown man and he needs to help his self, and face life like we all have to, your mother has done her part and has raised you all now it is up to them to do the rest. people like this have to hit rock bottom sometimes before they wake up so your mother needs to quit worring and let them hit rock bottom so they will pull their self back togeather, and pray and dont keep the door open to their wrong ways shut it.and stand firm own this, as long as some one is their to try and do it for them it will go own and own and own, this something to hard to bare for your mom so she has got to turn it over to the Lord and let him handel it, and stand firm Jesus will put a end to it, trust me own this, take those children to church and you all go and it will get over with, this is satan ruleing let Jesus deal with it, pray and dont let up own praying get all the people to pray that you can so it will get done, Jesus tells us come unto Him all that labor and are heavey laiden and I will give you rest..trust in Him. when all fails you call own Jesus...and put your trust in Him...and when 2 or more come togeather with the same prayer Jesus says it will be done trust in Him for all your needs, what do you have to lose. God bless and I am praying for your family and I will put you own our prayer list...Gods speed...

Answer 9

Can you put them in Daycare? I know it's expensive, but maybe you and your mother together can afford it.

Answer 10

Find some daycare providers and stuff.
Be there for her.
Pray.