Why can't be happy with my self?!?

Question

I dont know why I hate my self very much. Whatever I do I never feel proud of it or satisfy with the results. I hate how I look, although people say that I'm cute, funny, bla..bla.bla..! The thing is I dont think I'm not as good as they say.

Everytime I lok at the mirror I hate what I see. If I did something I never think "It's good!". What's wrong with me?

My hubby close to this Russian model, which apprently she's one of his studens. He said that there's nothing beetween them, but I keep telling my self that he's cheating on me. I'm ugly that's why he's cheating on me with the Russian girl.

My marriage is in the bottom of the rock and part of it because of me. My negativity (spelling???). It's difficult for me to let go the past as well makes it even worse.

Oh, I'm so confused, sad, desperate. I just want to be happy and normal. Please help me...

Answer 1

I'm sorry that you're so unhappy, but try to cut yourself some slack. Don't make impossible expectations for yourself and hate it when you don't meet them. I'm sure that you are normal and not ugly at all, so change your attitude and soon you'll find yourself being happier than ever.

Answer 2

you seriously need someone to talk to ( professional help). Don't let the russian model go to your head. she could really be just a friend or student. there will always be someone more attractive , you just need the confidence and self esteem to tell yourself that you are beautiful and it doesn't matter what other females look like. A man hates low self esteem from a woman and men hates a woman with no confidence. A man can sense when a woman is very confident about herself and thats what makes a man attracted to that woman is her confidence. i had the same problem. i started working out and getting my life together and i feel a hundred times better about myself. i'm no longer jealous of other females and i don't put myself down anymore. good luck to you.

Answer 3

You sound as if you are trying to live up to everybody else's standards and none of your own. You need to establish with yourelf who you are, what you are, and what you want to be. Instead of focusing on what makes you unhappy, find those things that make you happy. There are many reasons for hating yourself. If your marriage sucks, you may be hating yourself because you think that you are the cause. You may even being told that you are the cause. Jealousy makes faithful people cheat. If you accuse and the person is innocent, that person may get so tired to being accused that he/she will just go ahead and do it. What is there to lose if you're already being accused? If you are having problems dealing with the past, than you need to be in some kind of therapy to help you get out of these stuck places and get rid of unfinished business. Lots of people, who are quite attractive, feel ugly because their insides are ugly and need to be cured. You need some outside help.

Answer 4

Please find a good counselor in your area, start going, talk, listen, and, above all, don't believe there is an easy "cure."
It takes much work to improve your outlook on life and learn to love yourself.
Positive affirmations help. Even if you don't believe them at first, keep telling yourself whatever positive affirmations you can come up with.
When you start thinking negatively about yourself: pretend your brain is a blackboard, immediately erase these negative thoughts. Learn to stop worrying. Worry does not do a thing except cause physical and mental problems.
It is only difficult for you to let go of the past and see yourself in a negative light, because you allow yourself to dwell on the past and provide yourself with negative thoughts constantly, instead of dwelling, teach yourself to see the past as a teaching tool and STOP saying negative things about yourself.
I'm short, fat, and ugly, have had many, many bad things happen in my life, but decided years ago to say to myself, "I can live with myself the way I am, except myself the way I am, not allow my past or physical appearance dictate or have power over me, and learn to love myself. If others judge me, that is their problem, not mine. I am a good, loving, sweet, and gentle person and that is all that matters."
I call myself a B I T C H.
B - beautiful
I - intelligent
T - talented
C - calm
H - happy.....
It works.

Answer 5

you might benifit from some time out. i mean say to your husband hey this girl she is just a friend great then lets go out with her and her boyfriend or other friends and go dancing or something . if that is what she is she must have some other friends if not then insist she only meet with him at your home when you are there.
i think however some plain old fun is in order. dancing parties trips to movies all sorts of dating fun stuff is in order here.
that and a new dress or something to make you feel more specail . once that gets you feeling better then find something to help you have a sence of self worth besides your looks . a job or some volonteer stuff or even just a group of friends who all make a party from time to time. just dont over do it on the alcohol if you go out with this lady friend of his you might end up saying stupid stuff when drunk.

Answer 6

First, you need to sit down and think, "What really makes me happy about myself?" You can also write down the positive things on a piece of paper and keep that piece of paper somewhere you can look at it whenever you feeling down. Second, you should look in the mirror and say, "You know I am smart, cute, fun, and Gosh Darnet people like me!"

Answer 7

i think your unhappy with your self becuase you dont really think its worth it to praise your self for small stuff. next time you do some thing that you think you should be proud of, smile, whether you feel like it or not. I get like that some times, and what i do is when some one tells me im pretty, but dont believe it, try to believe it. think about it. keep it as a memory for when ever you feel down, and never put your self down, you keep telling your self all these bad things about your self, your mind actaully believes it after a while. emial me at [e-mail]

Answer 8

hope you make it...is that what life is all about? what happened? a person feels ok most of thier lives, and then something changes, a sudden drop of energy, will power, everything is heavy and a burden, you care about alot of people and thats what keeps you going, but think for a second, what happened to you? where did you end up in all of this?youv e been bombarded, life has brought you hard times, sheilds are low and weapons are down,but you know you can t give up!, and thats the toughest part, you wish life would just give you a vacation, you wish you could find a place where all resposiblities and guilt would give you a break, well, here are your options, take a break and waist everything around you, or, look at your situation from an other angle, what does_______(replace underline by your name) realy want?, what has and is preventing ________to get to that goal?who have you blamed for not getting to that goal?and who are you blaming now?...just stop for a second....and think outside the box....what if anything was possible right now, what would i do?, well for example, a career change, what is stoping you from being what you want?, you see , you got to understand that depression has many times got to do with deception, things that were hoped that never happened, people, things, dreams, careers, love, and carriing other people's lives on your shoulders, and thats behond any humans design, so forget it, if you want inner strength, build yourself, and then maybe you will have strength to help others, if you want strenght, you need to be strong, if you want to know how to be strong, you need to know what makes you weak, what makes you weak? well...your enemy....what's your enemy, FEAR...fear of yourself, of others, of what others think, fear of the future, fear of being rejected, fear of not being loved, fear of being hunted by your past, fear of not being good enough for others, fear of if i loose this arguement, for all the next ones, the other will vue me as weak and an easy target, fear i didn't raise my children right, fear of truth, fear of change, fear of being put back on track because it means accountability, responsibilty, and if i fail, i will be looked down again.

immagine if we could take that word called fear, and crush it under our feet once and for all, how piecefull and rested our life would be for all the events to come, and how all the things that your enemy would bring(fear) would never have a grip on you.

the greatest fear crusher is happy thoughts, positive thinking, put away the past, FORGIVE, if you don t forgive others, the enemy has a legal right to torment you, look at things from a birds vue, not from a horizon perspective, take a walk, breath air, watch a sundown, look at the stars, appreciate real friends, and stay away from gosip and negative friends, they are real energy suckers, and never produce joy, happiness, truth,... take time to heal, and life will give back to you, never linger in heavy negative thoughts...if those thoughts happen...right away...fight back and do something fun.

fear not

Answer 9

Do things you like, it will pick up your spirits. Set goals, and achieve them. However, you need to set realistic goals, set goals where its easy for you to achieve and difficult for you to fail. Decide you'll be happy just waking up or accomplishing something you know you can...that way its difficult for you to fail and if you don't fail then you can prove your selfworth to yourself. I'm sure you're a great person, obviously others think so. Sometimes we just have to accept what nature gives us, and believe what they say.

Answer 10

I think that I can´t help you cause I hate myself too, I have depression, a seriously illness.