I have a huge crush on this one guy, and he knows. He likes 3 other girls and said to me, "I dont want you to be mad if I dont choose you. There are other girls I like." I wouldn't be mad. but he hasn't chosen yet. So should I give up hope, continue waiting, Or flirt more so that I will be his choose?
2007-02-22 05:22:04 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well based on the fact you say you might not win this competition and you still like him, that means something else about you. Perhaps you are willing to do a little extra to get this guy. Let him know he doesnt have to choose just you and he can bring one of them other girls along too. Odds are they are going to not like the idea so much and for the guy.. well its every guys dream to be with two girls at once so you earned yourself a gold star for character. Though eventually he might dig up some girl that doesnt mind it and you'll have to put your money where your mouth is.
You can take all the advice you want about guys from other girls here as you like. But take it from one guy that knows very well the type of guy you like. This is how you get him and keep him. You are not going to be able to hold him down to just you for all of eternity so if you can accept this now and let him know its ok then you vastly improve your chances. Guys dont view sex the same way as girls do. So if you want the emotional relationship from him you are going to have to sacrifice a little bit of the traditional relationship moral.
On your last line of questions given the choice of flirt more, or give up. Do neither, if you dont agree with what I've said above then heres my last piece of advice. Make sure he knows youre there, talk about stuff that he wants to talk about, not shopping, shoes, purses, what so and so did with her makeup. We dont care about any of that and if it seems like we do then you've bought into a fascade. Guys also like a girl that can be like one of his guy friends on the inside and look like a hot girl on the outside. Becuase honestly, our relationships with girls outside of sex are not preferrable to hanging with the guys. The one week a month raging hormone fits where you make no sense whatsoever and go into a fit of rage when asked "what are you going to do with the butter?" really isnt our favorite thing to be around. Learn to talk about guy stuff. Learn to like beer. Like sports, you dont have to like them all either, just a couple.
Make the trip half way. Whats in it for you though? Well if you can earn a guy like this, he is going to looooooove you and he will make some changes himself. If you become what his ideal girl is and he falls for you, he will try to become more of what you want. Trust me though, no relationship is ever perfect no matter what anyone says. Nobody ever gets everything they ever wanted. You'll be lucky to make a list of all your dream guy stuff and only fill 50% of them with any guy you will ever be with. There is always going to be sacrifice on both sides.
Did i also mention to never let on that you are "trying hard" to get him, thats never going to work if he were to find that out either. Nobody likes obsessed people. You can be it, but dont show it.
Good luck!
2007-02-22 05:40:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is evident that he likes three others besides you and has warned that he does not want you to be upset if he does not choose you, it is obvious that this is choice he will have to make and let the others know that they did not exactly make the cut, but on the other hand if he has not choosen by now there is a chance that he will leave you in suspense a little longer and it could be that he could be a real ladies man, and you don't want a guy like that because if you and him pursued a relationship then there is a chance that he could cheat on you and then what would you do, so you have to think really hard is it worth waiting on him to make a decision or leave and find a man that will be there for you and treat you like you should be treated.
2007-02-22 05:35:09 · answer #2 · answered by gordonflames242003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. I've gotten over crushes for less than that. I once stopped liking a guy because he saw me dressed up for a banquet (I usually just wore sweats to class) and said he was going to look at me differently from then on.
You need to realize that you are valuable. You are special. The guy that you end up with needs to know that too. If he can't decide if he wants to be with you or some other woman, forget him. And if he has so little class and respect for you that he'll tell you something as stupid as "I don't want you to be mad if I don't choose you"........forget him. There is probably someone out there who likes you for who you are without all the flirting to catch their attention. They're just waiting for you to get over this idiot so they can show you.
Move on. Don't wait. Move on. Don't flirt more to move up over the other 3. Move on. You owe yourself at least that much respect. If he chooses you, move on anyway because he has already shown that he can be insensitive and is kind of absorbed in the fact that other women like him. He's likely to unchoose you when he starts getting more attention from other women.
2007-02-22 05:32:37 · answer #3 · answered by Zonte 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men are by nature Hunters, so, if you really want this guy, and think well on why you do...avoid him. He has such an ego, he couldn't handle rejection for very long. Why is he such a prize??? Looks? Money? Sports? A lot of these young men are unsure of their own masculinity, and want this attention to cover their own fears. Doesn't sound like long term involvement. Be careful and don't settle for a maybe, when there are others who would give you a sure. Best wishes
2007-02-22 05:33:28 · answer #4 · answered by tylernmi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my lord...sounds a little to complicated to be involved in. He sounds like a jerk off and no matter what you say, you are going to be hurt when he doesn't choose you. You should step away and not allow yourself to get involved with him. Even if he does 'choose' you as if he is some kind of God.
2007-02-22 05:28:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's no need to waste any more time on him, if he is in a spot where he can't decide between 4 girls?? You deserve someone who can tell you that you are what they are looking for and that you complete them in some way, not someone who says they are having trouble deciding.
If you two were together at some point, he may have trouble deciding whether or not to be faithful, I can't say for sure, but it's possible. You need someone who can make decisions. =)
Good luck to you!
2007-02-22 05:26:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Forget about him, he loves the drama, he loves knowing that he has all these girls interested in him, he isn't going to choose! He's just gonna let the 3 of you fight over him.
2007-02-22 05:36:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont flirt...let him chance you!!believe me i know the game!if he likes 3 other girls i'm sure when he chooses the one he wants to be with than he will prolly end up still wondering about the other girls so i wouldnt trust him!and if you wouldnt be mad than i think you should just walk away stop flirting and if he likes you enough he will chace you!be smart girlie!
2007-02-22 05:26:43 · answer #8 · answered by simplykimberly56 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
don't flirt more. but don't give up on all guys. if a guy likes more than 1 girl and is doing things like contests to see what gilr is best for him. if he picks you then great but if he dosen't then it isn't the end of the world.
2007-02-22 05:27:07 · answer #9 · answered by blah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Omg run away from this guy. Hes obviously having such a good time being such a ladies man why would he stay commited to you in a relationship? What a jerk - "if I choose you" geez it sounds like he thinks hes gods gift.
2007-02-22 05:25:34 · answer #10 · answered by radiancia 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋