Am I ready to settle down??

Question

I am in my twenties and only became successful in dating less than a year ago after years of frustration. In the past half year I have been with a few women casually. I was happy that I was finally able to do that and thought that was what I wanted...

Until I recently dated someone who is religious/spiritual and I think that is what I really want, a good woman not sex with different women all the time.

My hang up is that the girls I date are very attractive and usually very experienced with men. I am afraid if I settle down now, it will be too early and I will always have the feeling that I am not experienced enough. That she is more experienced than me. That I lost out.

I am way ahead of my friends who are in their thirties and ten years older than me, they are afraid to talk to girls and don't know what to do/say.

The question is do I chose God's path, turn to Him and settle down now with a woman from church or play the field to get over my insecurity before marriage?

Answer 1

If you need an imaginary friend then do what you have to do to make that imaginary friend happy. But I don't think that feeling of not being fully content ever goes away. At times in relationships the grass is always greener on the other side, till your on it again. Only you will know if you are ready to settle down with this chick, but make sure you give it a while before you get married, and see how each of you act after a while. But I had the same kind of life scenario w/out a religous factor, and I don't know if those kind of questions ever go away. Over time you will know what feels right. And it never hurts having kids young, because you will have more time to spend with YOUR family, and there is no other love like that of unconditional and unlimited love for your kids and thiers. There is always plus sides to which ever you choose. I wish you the best sir, and I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

Answer 2

I may not be of much use to you...but I am 19, dating a 17 year old girl (for over 2 years) and we are already talking about getting married. From what I have experienced so far, I would say that casual relationships offer nothing more than temporary fulfillment. If you find someone who you can love more than yourself - you will understand a whole new meaning of the word "love". Sex may be great, but it is no substitute for God's plan for your life, rather it should augment your relationship with God through a powerful, intimate relationship with your partner.

Either way, if you decide to get married...you should be confident in your decision. Take it seriously...so many people these days don't...it's sad.

Answer 3

Sweetheart, chose God's path he will not lead you astray. And then look into your heart and ask yourself what you really want. By now you should already know if this girl is the one for you. Never make a promise before God, if you can't keep it. And as for playing the field come on, thats just immature. I'm not sure of your experience level but when your in love your partner will not care about all the tricks you've learned in life, but the way you love her. I personally would not like it or appreciate it if my husband had an "experience list" a mile long.

Answer 4

when you're ready emotionally, mentally, physically, financially and spiritually ..then settle down.
are you sure you love the person already not because she's just filliing some void you had? Nothing bothers you anymore mentally? maybe some hurtful memories, make sure you had moved on? Love isn't enough, you must be ready. also, you yourself must be financially stable too. Choosing someone religious isn't a basis if you will settle down or not. Yes you may have faith in God but you must also cosider that not all who goes to church are real. Just make sure you had overcome some hang ups or whatever there that you need to resolve before getting a partner because you will also have your own issues. Good luck!

Answer 5

Chose God's path, turn to him and let him guild you in the direction he wants you to go in. If you are insecure about getting married then that is a clear cut sign that your not ready. God will never give you more than you can handle so remember that. And if it is not your time to get married God will send you the perfect person for you when he is ready. Its interesting how people make their own choices in life and God allows us to do so with "Free Will" but if those are not his plans for you, you will learn the hard way, things will not work out and he will lead you back to where you started, and hopefully you will make the right choice on your second chance.

Answer 6

If you are ready to settle down with one woman, you know it, no matter how old you are or how immature your friends are. It doesn't sound to me as though you've found the right partner yet. You will know she's the right one when you meet her and get to know her.

I have been married 28 years and this is about the only thing I know to be 100 % true. Good luck.

Answer 7

Since you're not 100% sure, I don't think you're ready to settle down. Are you ready to spend the rest of your life with one person? And as far as experienced goes.....pfffffft. More experience doesn't mean better sex. If you are 100% sure that you want to be with that one person, then my brother, make your move and begin the rest of your life. But make absolutely SURE that it's what you want. Good luck

Answer 8

Jack -
You are the only one who can make that decision, but I suggest
you pray about it......REALLY!

Also, I would suggest God's path......the other path is only going
to lead to heartache and heartbreak. If you choose Gods path
you are going to find a good girl who loves you for who you are
not how experienced you are in the sack. Also, you will be able to grow together.........mentally, physically, and most importantly spiritually.

Good luck

Answer 9

I wouldn't recomend playing the field
But I don't think you are ready to settle down
Just date without the sex
too many diseases out there
you gotta be careful

Answer 10

If you feel like you have insecurities, then turn her down. in your marriage, you should feel greatful that ur with her, not wishing that you took the other way! that would hurt her even more.