In other words no small kids. I recently got married on a beach and am having a recption in my hometown for my family in the late spring. Several of my family members and friends have kids, and I do not want small kids at the reception. I am looking for the correct wording to advise this on the invitation.
Thanks in advance
2007-02-22 04:55:23 · 13 answers · asked by tree 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Only the people you invite should expect to attend your party. Logically, that means that if you don't specifically invite kids, then they shouldn't show up.
But, you know as well as I do, that there are some clueless people out there who claim the umbilical cord has never been cut, and therefore they can't be away from their precious babies.
Puts you in a tough situation, I know. On the one hand, you want the party the way you want it. On the other hand, you don't want to insult your friends and family by assuming they would be so rude to begin begin with.
First, I would make sure that the invitations look very "grown up." No neon colors, no cartoons, etc. Very crisp and formal looking. Then I'd "chat" with those most likely to offend and make off-hand comments like, "Oh, I hope you can find a sitter! We'd so love to see you at the party!" Or even make up a scenario, like, "I just can't believe some people! Did you know that one of the guests just assumed she could bring her kids along with her? Some people..." Just don't name names. That gets the message across without coming right out and telling them "no kids." It also makes it look like you naturally assumed they knew better, so it was OK to vent to them.
2007-02-22 05:13:18 · answer #1 · answered by Daisy 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is fighting a war that you may end up losing no matter what. It's my observation that people who want to bring their kids will ignore any wording you choose and either bring their kids anyway, or will ask you to make an exception for them because of some special circumstances.
You might see about having a childcare provider available away from the actual reception to keep an eye on the kids, but then you run up against the kind of parents who won't entrust their kids to a stranger, no matter what credentials the stranger has.
...And of course you have to figure that at least some of the can-I-bring-my-kids faction is going to take offense. If these are family members, I think you have to ask yourself if it really, really is a good idea to antagonize them. Just a thought.
Were I in your shoes, I would phrase the invitation something like this: "Because of the lack of safe play facilities and supervision for children under 16 at [location of the reception], we respectfully request that you not stress your small children out by bringing them to the reception. We plan on holding a play-date picnic at a later date and an appropriate location, where we can all have a lot of fun. Thank you for your consideration in this matter."
(If you really want to be on the ball, set up the playdate site and date and include that in your invitation.)
Good luck.
2007-02-22 05:16:40 · answer #2 · answered by Karin C 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say something like "adult reception at bla bla bla..."
But I would also be prepared that some of those with children won't attend because of the restriction. Some people welcome an evening without their children (and other people's children too) but some are offended or put off by it, especially if they are family - the children are family too! But it's your reception, do what you wish, just be prepared that a small portion may have to decline - there isn't an unlimited supply of "trusted" babysitters out there - and if you are invited husband and wife, one or the other may have to stay home with the kids. Good luck.
2007-02-22 05:39:13 · answer #3 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you desire no children at your reception you MUST word your invites as such:
Adult reception immediately to follow
two o'clock in the afternoon
This and That Restaurant
123 Here Street
Rochester, NY
"ADULT" reception is the universal wording that says "keep the kids with the babysitter"...
Good luck and congratulations!
2007-02-22 05:06:58 · answer #4 · answered by terry_powerprofit 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
one way to do it is 1) just put the adult names on the invitation and 2) on the RSVP card, put the adult names there as well with a box for yes or no....from everything I have read, putting something directly on the invitation is not proper etiquette. In addition, spread the word....
2007-02-22 05:12:39 · answer #5 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Adult reception" is the appropriate wording. Additionally, you can word the invitation envelopes accordingly by addressing only those who are allowed to attend.
Outer envelope should read Mr. and Mrs. Smith (no "and family").
Inner envelope should read specifically Bob and Jane Smith and if they have one child over 16, you might put Bob, Jane, and Jill Smith (omitting any children under 16).
2007-02-22 05:34:11 · answer #6 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm having the same dilema the two most sensable options are putting "Adult Reception" or "No Children Please" on the invitations. If you think your guest will get the hint relatively quickly then put adult reception. If there any questions as far as age is concerned they wil contact you.
2007-02-22 05:09:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok, I wouldn't word it any way. If it's your family memebers that have kids, and you go and say you don't want them there, they're going to be offended. Better to have a 2nd party (like your mom or sister) talk to the parents and advise they get a sitter for that night.
2007-02-22 05:07:38 · answer #8 · answered by kebbs32 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
How sad for you to exclude your friends' and family's children. "Adults Only" I guess.
(If I received a wedding reception invitation excluding children, I wouldn't attend.)
2007-02-22 05:26:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Mine was worded....Adult reception. No one under 16 admitted.
2007-02-22 05:12:01 · answer #10 · answered by goodbye 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋