This is long, but I need input from outsiders, please answer?

Question

a year ago i ran into this guy and we instantly clicked.The problem is this guy is mutual friends with my brother and my x(my x and bro r best friends)when i ran into this guy i was still bitter about catching my x cheating,he was sweet and listened and understood,he drove me home that night,he told me there was a'guy code'and he was hesitant to breaking it,but i invited him to stay and he did,i asked him to sleep in the bed w/me,he did,i asked him to put his arm around me,he did till i slept,he was so sweet.I saw him 2 months later and he came to me and said"your killing me"my x was there alos and freaking out that we liked eachother.10 months later now,i called him and told him he was eating me alive,he said feelings are mutual and he had no idea thats how i feel.The problem now is he has been dating someone for a month now so i told him to tell me to give and let it go and he said he cant because im so beautiful.What now?

Answer 1

He's with someone else. If he left her for you, then what makes you think he might not one day leave you for someone else. If he was still so interested in you, then he should have seen if there was anything there between the two of you before he got involved with another.

In my opinion, he sounds like he is playing you and you are falling for it. He feeds you that line about a 'guy code' and being hesitant to break it, then slowly works his way to spending the night with you. This crap is so old school tactics. Everything else plays out the same way.

This isn't what you want to hear, though, which is too bad.

Answer 2

Well, remember how upset you were that your ex cheated? You don't want to do that to the girl he is now with so until he is no longer with her then you should not be involved with him. Also, if he cheats on her with you, chances are he will cheat on you with someone else.

Besides the "guy code" there has to be another reason that you two didn't get together sooner. There has to be something else behind it, because if he felt as strongly as you make it seem that he does, he would have talked to your brother and your ex and explained his feeligs for you and asked you out.

Tell him straight out that you feel this way about him and think he feels the same about you but need to know where this is going to go. Tell him that you can not date him if he is going out with someone else, but do not want to be strung along waiting for him.

The choice is up to him at this point, but you need to make it clear that you want it to go further, but won't wait around forever.

Good luck.

Answer 3

This girl he's dating now for one month - really isn't significant. It's not like it's been 12 months. Ask him straight up about getting together and seeing about making it work. See how he reacts. Don't do it over the phone - in person only! You have to see his body language and hear him at the same time to make the proper assessment. Take the heat off of him and tell him you understand if he doesnt' want to due to this new girl. And you have to obey it!

Answer 4

It is obvious that your friend needs to make a decision about what he wants to do in on instance he wants to be with you but in the other he is dating someone, whoever he decides to date he needs to tell you and the other person. since he knows how you feel and the feelings of the other person, this decision he will have to make won't be easy but he knows that he has to do it. Talk to him again if you have to just so you can get some answers to you question although all of them will not be answered, maybe you will get an idea about what you are up against and can go from there.

Answer 5

This may sound hard, but its out of your hands right now, its in his, you've done your part. He needs to choose between you, or the person he's currently dating.

A word of caution however, feelings like that rarely persist for long in a relationship, and are not a good basis for forming a healthy long term relationship. You may want to evaluate him on his behavior, character and general conduct.

The good news there is that feelings rarely persist, so given time, the way you feel for him will diminish, and you would find it easier to move on. You do need to occupy yourself however, that your thoughts do not stray back to him.

Answer 6

You already told him how you feel. If he really feels that strongly about you, he'll break up w/ his current girl to be w/ you or try to start things up w/ you once his current relationship has ended. But as of now, you should stop contacting him; since as long as he has a gf, if you two do have relations, he's no better than your cheating ex.

Answer 7

Well, as far as the code, I admire him for his integrity. But after 10 months, the code no longer applies. If you really like him and he feels the same about you, then you should explore the options of taking things to the next level.

Answer 8

Sounds very confusing. Just wait things out. If you both were meant to be together than it'll happen. But it seems like you kinda rushed things at your house. Having him sleep in the same bed as you and everything, maybe you rushed things and he has false feelings. Maybe you should talk things out with him.

Answer 9

A relationship will only work if both people are free and willing. If he wants to be with you he will break it off with his current. You should back off and let him decide so that if things go south he can't blame you.

Answer 10

I would say forget the guys code if you like each other go
for it. but make sure he lets the other person down easy.
and about your ex there is a reason he is your ex right

Good Luck!!!!!!