Frustration and Kids?

Question

I have two kids, a 16 month old and a 1 month old. I'm sure lack of sleep is a part of it, but i am so frustrated with them. I unfortunately don't have a ton of help from my spouse and/or family and am pretty much doing it all on my own. I have managed to get this far, but i am at my wits end and need to cope better. Can any moms with two or more kids offer some advice on what you did or are doing to keep sane? Or can someone recommend some good websites for tips?

Answer 1

Well I have just one...he's 4 months old...the only thing that keeps me sane is the fact that I went back to work...at least there I can get some damn rest...

If I were you, I would hire a nanny or a nurse or someone to come in once or twice a week or for just a few hours everyday so that you can get sane. The sleep depreivation is a a killer...like I said..I just have the one...I don't know how people do it with 2, 3, 4 or 5...god forbid multiples!! I'd go nuts....

Don't get me wrong...they are a blessing ...I have no regrets...but you people with more than one...are frigging miracle workers...I don't know how you do it...especially the folks out there with multiples...it's mind boggling to me.

Good luck mamma and congrats!

Answer 2

I am the mother of 5.. 14-1 year... I work full time.. I am a full time mother.. My 1 year old is disabled.. You have to start a routine.. Once you get a routine down then everything else will flow into place..

Now WTH is wrong with your spouse. You did not make these kids by yourself. Someone else needs to step up to the plate and take care of business.. If that is not an option. Go on line and find some parenting support groups.. Or play session for your kids with other kids. This way you can get ADULT interaction and build the kids social skills. But DO NOT put your kids in daycare that young.. The are at high risk of catching everything..

Answer 3

I know how you feel. I have five kids, all under the age of 7 when the last of them was born. Three in diapers at once, oh joy, LOL.
The four best pieces of advice I can give you are these:

* Use the kids' naptime as your own naptime too. It's super tempting to try to get stuff done while they're sleeping, but it will help enormously if you catch up on your sleep.

* If the house is making you crazy because you can't seem to keep up with it, go to Flylady.com. It'll make housework manageable again.

* One day a week, make Mommy Time. Find someone to leave the kids with (hubby, mom, neighbor who will trade off sitting with you... I used a drop-in babysitting service located next to the gym) and go off on your own. Window shop at the mall, take yourself to lunch, or just go to the park and breathe and enjoy the silence. It will do you, and your family, a world of good.

* Don't resent your hubby. This can be tough, because it's hard when he comes home from work and needs to relax and wind down, and you feel like you never get to relax and wind down. When he comes home, feed him, let him unwind for a bit, then encourage him to play with the older child for a bit before bed. Once the kids are down for the night, try to spend some time remembering why you fell in love and ended up mothering children in the first place. Even just snuggling up together on the couch and listening to him talk about his day can give you a break from the kids and let you relax.

Good luck. They are much easier to physically care for as they get older. Of course, we won't talk about the emotional and mental strain once they become teenagers... :-)

Answer 4

I understand where you are coming from i had my three yr old step daughter when my first child was born and I was tired because my baby never wanted to sleep and im a person who needs 10 hours of sleep or im grouchy it was hard I thought I would lose my mind but yanno I eventually got through and things got easier I know you have a much younger first baby but I will be having my second child in august then ill have a 5 yr old a 2 yr old and a newborn thank god for school lol I would suggest trying to get them to nap at the same time in the afternoon so you can take a break and dont bother trying to do housework at that time ,relax watch tv read a book surf the internet or take a nap yourself and just remember how fast your first one grew you will be smooth sailing in no time. Hang in there =)

Answer 5

I know exactly how you feel... It's awful overwhelming when you have two babies that are fighting for your attention. (Mine are 18 months apart) I can't tell you what will work for you but any ideas when you are at your limit will help.
I had to go out and get a part-time job so that I didn't lose my sanity, oh and an anti-depressant. I'm so glad I did. I only work in the evening after my husband gets home from his job. This makes it better for the problem of not getting enough help from him too. lol They have no choice than to deal with it while you are gone. Plus he'll realize all that you do each day.
Now I'm not saying anit-depressants are the answer for everyone but I still 5 years later am taking one. It helps me get through my day easier. I'm not nearly so irritable. I can enjoy my time with my children much better.
It will get better as they get older and more independant also. Just hang in there and remember YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 6

Invest in a moms day out program. Its 2 days a week for 4 hours a day. Use that time for you. Make dear old dad pay since he doesn't seem to help much!

Answer 7

Suggest to your spouse that you would like to send them to daycare a few days a week to get some rest for yourself, and so you don't go insane. If hes a caring man, he should appreciate all that you are doing, and realize you need this.

Answer 8

Send them to daycare. I send my older two to daycare for 4 hours Monday, Wednesday, and friday, and 5 hours tuesday and thursday. I stay home with my twins (they are a month old) Monday, Wednesday, and friday. On tuesday and thursay, they go to the daycare also.
It's called "Mommy day" and every mom should have atleast one every week.

Answer 9

Kick your spouse in the butt. Tell him to grow a set-become a man and help father/raise his children. Otherwise hes just being a little boy. Its not fair that hes putting it all off on you.

Answer 10

i have four kids, ages 11, 6, 4, 1 and its hard to stay sane around my house!! it doesn't sound like you get much time to yourself, but you need to. try parents.com they have tips for everything!