My boyfriend acts like he loves me so much and wants to be around me when we are alone together, but when he is around other people and I am also there he ignores me and pays attention to other girls only, not like in a sexual way but in like a friendly way- only he ignores me and doesn't talk to me hardly at all, acts strange aroud me, and it's like he doesn't want other girls there to know that he and I are in a relationship because he wants them to keep flirting with him.
What should I do? Please help me out with some advice- this is really hurting me; how can I make him act like he does when he and I are alone together when we are also around other people?
2007-02-22 04:12:20 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, as I tell everybody, the key for a good relation is to communicate. You must sit down with him and talk about your feelings.
Maybe he doesn’t even realize what he is doing, so it is a good idea to le him know how he chances his attitude from being alone with you and being with you in front of others.
Or maybe he does it on purpose, but if that is the case, then he must change, otherwise he is not good for you.
But whatever is the case, you have to confront him, and be honest. Don’t get mad or give him an attitude even if he gives you one. Remain calm and show him you are willing to talk, not to fight about it, at least not for now.
If he is sorry, and says he didn’t realize it, and promises to change, then you promise him that you will help him too in case he starts doing it again and he doesn’t even realizes it again.
If he gives you an attitude and says that you are just jealous or you are overreacting or something like that, and still denies to be doing that, then you tell him (remain calmed down) that maybe he is right, but that you would appreciate if he can change a little bit and to think about it, and just leave it like that. From there, just watch him. If he does it again, just pull him apart from anybody (so you are in private) and tell him nicely that he is doing it, and to please let you be in his conversations, etc, etc. From that point, you will have to watch him and decide if you think he is at least trying, of if he doesn’t do anything about it.
And if by any chance he agrees he likes to change while in public, then be direct and tell him you don’t appreciate that. But I doubt he would tell you that anyways.
Hopefully he will change. Otherwise, you will have the right to get mad at him, and if things don’t work out, it will be up to you if to stop the relation or not.
Good luck.
PS. If you see he tries, and there is improvement, show him your appreciation for what he is doing and give him some rewards… ehem… ;)
2007-02-22 04:36:35 · answer #1 · answered by Dan D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all.... you can't MAKE someone act any certain way. Then I think your boyfriend has an inreriority complex, otherwise he wouldn't turn into a jerk when others are around.
I say you should ignore him too, and not spend time with him, unless he look for you. It just sounds like he's playing games with you, and you shouldn't allow him to treat you like this.
Either he snaps out of it on his own, or give him the boot. You could also find out why he's doing this, have you confronted him?
2007-02-22 12:26:21 · answer #2 · answered by grldragon101 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have had this problem before as well. The answer is YES he does not want them to know that you two are in a relationship. He wants to keep his options open in case things don't work out between you two. If I were you I would tell him that you didn't go out with him to be his "mistress". Tell him that its complete bullsh*t that he would rather pay more attention to other girls than you. Ask him if he is questioning how much you mean to him and ask him how he would feel if he was in the same situation.
2007-02-22 12:18:03 · answer #3 · answered by Kristin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hes not worth it tell it to him straight he is either your boyfriend un and out the house or he is not at all. don't let him mess you around!!!!!!
He shouldn't be getting to you like that if he realy love you.
2007-02-22 12:23:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him why he's acting like that and tell him how much it affects you.
2007-02-22 12:18:09 · answer #5 · answered by Bubblez ♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like this guy is a huge player and if i were you i wouldn't give it a second thought and i would leave his a** right away....You don't deserve this!
2007-02-22 12:36:01 · answer #6 · answered by Kasja 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if he doesnt want them to know that yall are going out them LET THEM KNOW if he denies it break up with him and move on
2007-02-22 12:20:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't make him act anyway that he doens't want to act.
2007-02-22 12:18:43 · answer #8 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ask him about it. tell him that you dont understand why hes doin it.
2007-02-22 12:16:43 · answer #9 · answered by hillbillyangelbaby 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋