We are both 60, both like a drink, I work 33 hrs a week but he hasn't, for two years. I come home each day and he has done nothing except watch T.V or read newspapers. We got a rescue dog a year ago and he won't even take her out for a walk. Because he has no motivation, I seem to have lost mine as well.
2007-02-22 02:16:56 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
This is a very tough situation, I'm sure. Has he been to see his family physician? That would be the first step. My husband was very depressed for a long time and once he started seeing a doctor on a regular basis, and she got his medical problems under control, and put him on an anti-depressant (Paxil) he is an entirely new person. He enjoys things now like he hadn't in many years. We also have a therapy dog for him and since he's been on his anti-depressant he's started walking the dog (causing my husband to lose weight and feel even better about himself) and he's gotten involved in hobbies that keep him busy.
2007-02-22 02:27:50 · answer #1 · answered by Vicky L 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you come home, try to be cheerful with him. Try to get him to get up and do something fun with you, Take the dog for a walk together, go to the store, even go for a ride somewhere on the week ends, anything to get him out of the house. Don't be mad at him, it makes it worse. If it really is bothering you, ask him to do something in particular by the time you get home. . .wash the dishes, walk the dog, pick up some where . . .that you would like it done so you don''t have to worry about it when you get home from a hard day at work. See if that helps. If not, Maybe it's time you both went to a Dr to see if he/she can help.
Bottom line, Please be loving and patient with him. If you aren't he might get more withdrawn from you and life. . . . You don't want that.
2007-02-22 02:39:32 · answer #2 · answered by mouse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are going to need a lot of patience and be supportive. The first step is to get your husband out of the house and into some type of group, maybe chess or some type of activity he enjoys where he can spend time with others (preferebly his age group). Maybe you to can join your local "elks" club or something like that. You both like to drink and they have activities there where he can go during the day and hang out. Good luck I know what it's like to deal with someone going through depression and it's not easy. Try to realize it's really not his fault. He's just unstructured and lost right now but you can help him get back on his feet. Just rememeber Patience is the key word here. Hang in there
2007-02-22 03:04:54 · answer #3 · answered by Jersey Style 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your partner has probably lost his sense of purpose as he hasn't worked for 2 years. Can't you persuade him to take up a new hobby or interest that you can both participate in? Or write a list of things you have always wanted to do but never got around to & then start ticking them off as you do them. Everyone needs some sort of purpose or goal in life, what ever our age. It is no good sitting in the house all day, that would depress anyone.
2007-02-22 02:30:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does sounds like he is depressed. Try St. Johns Wort - a natural anti-depressant. Can you talk to him about it? Maybe try and get him out at weekends, walking or involved in some other social activity. Does he have any hobbies that he could do during the day? Maybe if he got a part time job it would bring him out of his shell.
2007-02-22 02:28:40 · answer #5 · answered by monkienutz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure he takes his medication. If he hasn`t got any get him down the doc`s, because it sounds like he needs something to help. Leave him a few jobs to do around the place while you`re at work. If he refuses to comply and seek help tell him you`re off to seek new friends and have some fun! He can`t drag you down with him.He needs a wake up call!
2007-02-22 02:25:49 · answer #6 · answered by The BudMiester 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he really depressed? Has he been diagnosed with this illness? If he has,he needs all the help, love & support you can give him. If he isn't depressed, tell him to get off his lazy bum and DO something. Yes, walk the dog would be a good start.
2007-02-22 02:25:09 · answer #7 · answered by jet-set 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sure its not the drink making him depressed? its all too easy to fall into a depression when you have no motivation, cant he find some part time or voluntary work or a hobby? you will start to feel the effects of his depression if he doesn't try to help himself. I hope things work out for you.
2007-02-22 02:28:07 · answer #8 · answered by karen333342 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u can´t therapy a partner, not even think about it...i can only answer, what i would do in this case: stay alone.
i am very sorry, but such a lazybone and depressed person, only hanging ´round, living without working or helping u, i won´t accept.
if s.o. is ill, my full understanding with this person, so he can see a doc,get a therapy and will do better afterwards.
but just doin´nothin´and wastin´time can´t be toleranced.
2007-02-22 02:23:54 · answer #9 · answered by Alter Ego 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you can`t give up and become depressed like him. try to get his lazy butt off that chair and try joining some excercise programs for him. that way he doesnt stay home all day and has something better to do. excercising might help to cure his depression, and also walk that dog!!
2007-02-22 11:48:06 · answer #10 · answered by Blabbity 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋