Our daughter used to live with us. Today unfortunately she called the police on us (father & mother) so she could get her stuff from the house without our interference. Of course we are outraged. She took only bare essentials and she has remaining items here. Can she call the police again and just come & go as she pleases in our own home or can we remove her stuff from our house now that she has done this? We cannot afford her to come to the house again with police or my husband will risk a heart attack. We do not want her in our home ever again. What do we do with her items?
2007-02-22 00:13:42 · 19 answers · asked by reputfindin 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Give her items to her and tell her to leave forever and tell her u can take her into court if she does this again
2007-02-22 00:18:00 · answer #1 · answered by The Sweetest Sin Princess 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'm sorry you're going through this situation.
Maybe she only took the bare essentials so wouldn't have to be there any longer than she had to; she didn't want to make the situation worse. Maybe she called the police escort because she was afraid of confrontation if she came alone. You said you were outraged because she used the police as a way to get her things from the house without interference. Why were you outraged? If they were her things, doesn't she have the right to get them and leave and move on without confrontation? As awful as that sounds, maybe it was a better idea to bring an escort rather than a fight erupting?
She still has some things in your home. As hard as this is, you really need to bite the bullet and call her and ask her what she wants to do with her items. If she wants them, give her a timelimit for coming to get them (unescorted) with the promise that you won't interfere. Then you won't have to have her in your home again, which is what you want. If she doesn't want the items, then have them removed or throw them out.
How old is your daughter, by the way?
2007-02-22 00:22:37 · answer #2 · answered by AnswerMom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all -- the things that YOU purchased for her use .. you can do what you want with those items -- donate, throw away, whatever (after all it was your income that purchased those items in the first place).
Next: IF she lives in the same town you do (with a different address) .. then go to the police and have them SERVE her with a Trespass Order (one that will be enforceable -- meaning she can NOT legally be on your property at all for any reason OR she will be arrested and end up in jail).
IF she has been violent with you (which is a real possibility considering the way this question is framed), have you filed the Restraining/Personal Protective Order yet? You can go to a Domestic Violence Shelter for sure and get the help you and your husband need there in not just figuring out how to file the papers, but also support when you have to go in front of a judge to explain why you BOTH need this order (and NO elder needs to be abused NOR do they 'deserve' to be abused by their children).
AFTER that .. anything that she has purchased (from her income) that is STILL in your home ... box up (and yes, take an inventory), and (again, the Domestic Violence Shelter can help you here), get the paperwork to send her Certified, Return Receipt, a notice to pick up the items or they are forfeit after 30 days ... and can be disposed of after that time. YOU will start that 30 day timeclock from the date on the Return Receipt.
2007-02-22 01:23:21 · answer #3 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would your husband have a heart attack if the police are called because your daughter wants to get her stuff out, you obviously are not telling everything, i can only guess that you and your husband got into a fight with her and you threw her out on the street and telling her never to come back, and i can almost bet that is what happened, so your daughter wants her things and seeing how you said things like that she had no other choice to bring the police and yes she has the right to get her things out call her and tell her that you will leave them somewhere in the garage and give her a certain amount of time to get them cause if you don't she can take you to court for disposing of them even if they get damaged, so think before you act.
2007-02-22 00:20:20 · answer #4 · answered by Mary O 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you are upset at her , but pack her things in boxes or bags and set them in the garage or attic and write down everything you packed in boxes so that if she trys to take you to court or something saying you did something with her stuff that never existed . Do it with a witness besides your husband . Have the witness sign the paper and you as well and date and time you packed it . When she comes for her stuff it will be packed and try and get her to sign the paper if it is possible . If you have no intentions of letting her come and get it just wait . Do not let a third party pick these items up for her cause that could be bad . GOOD LUCK !!!! Don't let her take advantage over you or your husband . Let her know you love her but you need to think of your husbands health and yours and you can't go through this again .
2007-02-22 00:24:06 · answer #5 · answered by Me777 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Store them in the basement and tell her if she wants them she can come without the police but it will be the a once only deal. I don't know what happened between the 3 of you but she is obviously very angry with you.
You also didn't say how old she is? If she is still a teenager then she may come back needing the love and support that she suddenly realized she's missing. Teenagers often leave their parents homes in fits of anger (been there) & they come home when they realize life isn't all the rosy out there on their own.
2007-02-22 00:21:57 · answer #6 · answered by Lucy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack them up and put in the garage or tell her to come get them and give her specific time and day to retrieve them. You can also tell her you will meet her at the local police station to pick them up or have a mutual family member of friend bring them to her. You do not have to allow her entry into your home again. She should have taken EVERYTHING when she came with the police.
2007-02-22 00:18:42 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think first of all you need to remove her from your address so that she won't have a reason to come around! then you need to go to the police station and tell them that the story that she did not take all of her things like she was suppose to do in the first place and please,please get a copy of that report showing that you reported this, and then you need to take out a ppo=personal protection order on her..this will stop her from coming within a certain amount of feet of you, your husband and property and do take the police reports when you go to take out the order on her! i know it's sad, but you gotta do what you gotta do!..good luck!
2007-02-22 00:24:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not just move her items in storage or up in the garage or something. Or put them in trash bags on the porch, contact her to get her belongings. I think you need to contact your local sheriff department and ask them what you can actually do or can't do. They should have a civil deputy that works only with civil cases. Best of luck
2007-02-22 00:18:17 · answer #9 · answered by Amanda 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Gather them up and take them to the police station. This will make them police property and she will have to pick them up and sign for them there. Leave a note on your door telling her you did this, or call her to tell her AFTER you do it. God Bless the two of you, I wish you the best and will pray for you and your daughter.
2007-02-22 00:19:27 · answer #10 · answered by absolut_nixter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She brought the police in, so if she didn't get what she thought to be hers, she will forfeit the rest, but to be on the safe side put her things in a box, and hold them for 30 days.
2007-02-22 00:18:27 · answer #11 · answered by Nikki B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋