...when a person is put into a position where they feel they are being forced to chose.
What would you do?
2007-02-21 23:56:08 · 18 answers · asked by Betsy 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
The parents are causing the need to chose. The spouse says, go, have a relationship with them, they ARE your parents.
The lies are just too many and never stop. Both spouses are most often present when they are supposed to have been said so know they are in fact lies.
2007-02-22 00:04:38 · update #1
We are supposed to honor our parents but when one marries, your choice lies with the spouse. It's sad though when one has to choose. No one should be put in that situation.
2007-02-22 00:01:45 · answer #1 · answered by Mary G 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It says in the bible that when you get married
you leave your parents and
Cleave unto your spouse.
Meaning:
Your spouse is supposed to come 1st
You made a vow before God to be One with that person.
and to Leave your parents House.
Standing beside your spouse is both Honorable and Respectable.
Your parents will Understand and love you Regardless.
and they will probably Respect your marriage all the more in the long run.
Good Luck
2007-02-22 00:06:02 · answer #2 · answered by jewelblossom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For Catholics the choice seems obvious. I taught a course on the Sacraments (including Marriage) years ago, and not that Sunday School bull, but a real, academic course on the Sacraments. This had nothing to do with personal faith development, but an investigation of doctrine and how it was developed (and I taught the other personal development kind, too). ANYWAY, first comes your relationship with God and with yourself. These two should always be your top priority. Next comes your spouse. Only after that should be your kids, IE you should always put your relationship with your spouse above your relationship with your kids if you want a strong, foundational marriage for those kids to thrive in. Parents, who are now your extended family, come after. Now, this assumes that you AGREE with your husband more than with your parents in this situation of which you speech. Remember, FIRST be true to yourself and your God.
2007-02-22 00:04:55 · answer #3 · answered by Not Your Muse 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well your parents are your family when growing up, and your spouse is you immediate family when you get married. So I would say your spouse. But if circumstances indicate that your spouse was at fault, let him/her know that you did not like what ever they did. But never do it in front of your parents. And if your parents did something well have a serious talk to them.
2007-02-22 00:03:00 · answer #4 · answered by LuNis 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
God said spouse-look at it this way you picked that person and you have to go to bed every night with them not your parents and make a point to stand by your spouse and parents usually back off and respect you for the decision its not about who you love more or whose right its about respecting your partner and their decisions and living with it if you back your hus/wife life at home will be wonderful
2007-02-22 00:05:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would choose my spouse, but I wouldn't block out my parents, because thats just not right.
Everyone needs to start a family, well, I guess not everybody, but the people that WANT to...
If you can't choose...
I would sit down and explain why and how I can't choose, and there needs to be a sense of balance installed into both relationships...
Good luck :o)
-blessed be
2007-02-21 23:59:55 · answer #6 · answered by iColorz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The Bible says to honor your parents so that you may have a long life. I noticed from Spark13's answer that the Quran pretty much says the same thing.
The Bible also says that a wife should submit to her husband; this means that he is the head of your household. He is to be to you and your children as Christ is to the church. He is also the final decision maker - as we all know, there can be only one CEO in a company!
Without knowing the full story this is all I can tell you, to do both of the above. Use this as your guidelines in making your choices, and God will bless you for seeking Him first, for doing His will as best you can. Feel free to email or IM me if you want to discuss it more, it's hard to help without knowing the circumstance :)
2007-02-22 00:09:34 · answer #7 · answered by arewethereyet 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The important issue is why they do not honor each other.....i believe in being noble.....pick the side who is making the most sincere, positive effort... and then tell the other side to show more respect.
If neither is showing respect to the other, then tell both sides, you will not take sides...they need to grow up...you will not choose between them
2007-02-22 00:01:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a Muslim its parents come first. A scholar narriated that a man walked to the prophet and asked who should i take care of . The Prophet replied; "Your Mother". The man then asked again and the Prophet replied again ;"Your Mother" and again the man asked and the same reply was given. The 4th time however he said your Father. It is also known that heaven lies under the foot of your mother (meaning you should treat her with love and respect, not yell at her etc if you want to enter the heavens)
2007-02-22 00:01:39 · answer #9 · answered by Spark13 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You become one in a marriage..you as a wife should have deep respect for your husband.
You should honor your parents in that you care for them emotionally and show them you are grateful that they raised you. God says you should leave your parents and stick to your spouse.
When it comes to decisions, listen to your husband. But don't compromise your Christian principles to hurt your relationship with God.
A wise woman will find a way to have parents and a husband in her life. You shouldn't have to choose between them. Your parents should not be cut out of your life or your children's lives.
Pray about it.
2007-02-22 00:16:15 · answer #10 · answered by debbie2243 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋