cutting daughter?

Question

My daughter is a cutter. she will cut herself for stupid reasons and i dont understand it. can someone tell me why this seems to be the cool thing to do now days? its not like she has a bad life she has every thing she needs roof fuse tv love and a very understanding free thinking parent yes only one i am a single parent, i lett her express herself and explore life at her pace but this cutting thing has me stumped. how can i get her to stop before shes nothing but a scar.

we went on vacation last year to texas california and vegas so thats not it. she tried to hide it some but not effectevly and all her friends do or have done it, her mother is somewhere in california we havent seen her since 1993 my daughter was 6 months when she left. hasnt been abuse that i know of have been very close and open with each other for a long time she tells me alot i know not all but most. thinks for your answers she wont go to counslers.

Answer 1

If I remember correctly, this has something to do with a need for touch, kids scratch themselves or cut themselves because their lacking touch. If this is the same thing, the therapy requires like a hard massage over the arms, legs, back. I remember reading about it somewhere, however I have no idea what it's called. You need to get your daughter help.

Either way, this is a disorder, I don't know if your daughter has what I am talking about or not. You really need to bring her to a therapist for help ASAP. I am no expert in this area, they will help you.

Good Luck

Answer 2

Sounds like she might need some psychiatric help. This might be a cry for help and something maybe dark and deep rooted that maybe she doesn't want to talk about? Just a suggestion. Alot of times cutting; is an emotional release. I did it when I wasn't taking medicine. Now I am on medication and I don't even think about it. I wanted to feel the physical pain instead of emotional pain. Example, a break-up of a boyfriend. I had everything also. Loving parents, roof over my head. That stuff doesn't matter. She might be clinically depressed and maybe have never been diagnosed for it. Her brain doesn't think in terms of what she has. It might be thinking of something that needs or she is missing.

Answer 3

My sister, now 31, used to cut herself as a teenager. She had underlying depression and anxiety issues that caused her to feel that hurting herself was the only way for her to deal with her feelings. Your daughter may be given "everything she needs" but that doesn't mean she might not FEEL like her life is bad. I would guess that she probably needs some help, be it from you or a psychologist, she may even need some medication. This can quickly turn into a disastrous situation so the sooner you take initiative the better. Good luck to you and my heart goes out :)

Answer 4

I used to be a cutter myself. She may be stressed or even depressed about something, Maybe something's going on at school that she isn't telling you.
Cutting is not the cool thing to do these days, it's a release of anger, pain, and resentment. They don't know any other way to release all those negative emotions. Help her to find other ways to vent, if she is in fact depressed/stressed about something.
Sometimes when people cut themselves it's a cry for attention. Maybe she isn't getting enough attention at school from other people.
These are just some of the reasons why some of my friends used to cut and why I used to cut myself.
If the cutting starts to get out of hand, like she is cutting too deep, you need to take her to a psychologist.
Talk to her, see if she is holding anything feelings in.

Answer 5

Cutting is a sign that a child has been sexually abused. It's called self mutilation. How old is your daughter? Cutting is not normal behaviour, its a way of expressing pain through seld destruction. I know this because when I was 15, I too was a cutter. I was repeatedly abused as a child. I hated myself at the time. Now I am an adult, I watch for these signs in my own child. This is not normal behaviour for a little girl. You need to seriously look into this.

Here are some links for you to educate yourself on. Good Luck.
http://www.selfinjury.com/

http://www.coolnurse.com/self-injury.htm

Answer 6

i know this doesnt sound like i take this type of thing seriously but my question is this......is she really doing damage and trying to keep it away from you, or is it not so bad cuts and she's making sure you know she's doing it? cause when i was younger, only a few years back actually i used to do the whole over dose thing every time something didnt go my way, my mum would be in tears all the time cause i would make her think i was over dosing but i wasnt really it was all for attention( something young girls kinda live for!) and one day my aunty told mum to ignore me when i did it ( she could see right through me cause i wasnt her darling daughter!!) and as soon as mum wasnt interested in my little drama scene .....either was i!!! its just a thought though obviously if your girl is very serious she might need some serious help theres nothing i can help you with if thats the case because im not a doctor but i really hope for your sake its all for attention, i know from how i acted that daughters can be such a handfull,my mum always said you'll know what its like one day you'll have a daughter who gives you a hard time....well i was blessed with a dear little daughter 2 years ago and she already runs me off my feet i just know what im in for years down the track!!. Good luck i hope you and your daughter work it all out.

Answer 7

I am not sure that I have any advice to give on this matter.. but I will share with you the reasons that I have seen for cutting

The first is that the individual sees cutting as some release of an inner pain. I've heard it described as hurting themselves makes the other pain not seem as bad. Your daughter is not trying to kill herself, because the way cutters do it.. they would not be successful at committing suicide.

The second reason I have seen is that the kid just wants attention. It doesnt mean you have done something wrong in parenting or that they are deprived of attention, but I am not sure.. its just something in their personality. If your daughter shows these cuts off to her friends it is most likely that she is doing it for attention or acceptance


I hope this helps some.

Answer 8

Get her into counseling. I had abuse issues when I was younger (1970's)... I started self-injuring in 1973. I was alone in it.. no Internet... nothing. I struggled with self-injury as a way of dealing with anger and unnamed emotions that had nowhere to go. Not until the late 90's (I was in my 30's) when I entered the Internet world, did I find out that I was not the only one in the world who did that...

On the other hand, I also noticed, while participating in an online support group, that among young girls, "cutting" was becoming a trendy thing to do... not necessarily attached to any lifelong emotional issues... Maybe because of their exposure to this reality because of the Internet.

Whatever the reason your daughter is cutting, she does need to get help before she accidentally cuts too deep...

Here is the website that offered support for me when I first learned I was not alone... there is help for understanding "Cutting", support for cutters and support for family's of cutters... hopefully you can find some help here:
http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html
There is a lot of info here... so take some time to explore this site.

Good luck to you and your family!

Answer 9

There is a psychological problem. Sometimes it can be deep seated--and needs psychological treatment-including medication. On the other hand, it has become a thing in vogue and celebrated in teen culture--it is an attention getting device.

It is important that it be carefully evaluated--the latter may need some counseling and certainly some adjustments at home. But it does not need medication, etc.

Answer 10

it sounds like shes reaching out, for what reason...i have no idea, is there problems at school or with boys? i had a friend who was a cutter, and it was a form of attention seeking (i know that sound bad) and depression for her. i literally had to break down the bathroom door to get to her one day because she took to herself with an army knife thing. i think she needs counseling, as open as she is with you theres obviously something going on that she feels too ashamed or embarrassed to talk to you about. she might find it easier to talk to someone outside her everyday circle about this. if she locks herself away to do the cutting...take down her door, anything you think might help dont hesitate and do it, if she doesnt get help soon the cutting might lead to much worse. i hope i was some help