My husband and I got married about a month ago. We've been living with his parents for about 7-8 months now. They're great and all but we are not expectin our child and feel that we need our own apt. they think apt is stupid-- what do u think on this?
2007-02-21 16:04:52 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
get your own place trust me you will want your own place when you are pregnant and then when its time to bring home your baby!! they probably just don't want to miss out on anything but in the end when they see you will still include them it will be fine but do your self a favor and do it asap because moving when your huge is no fun i did it once and will never do that again!
2007-02-21 16:17:41 · answer #1 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you married to a man or a child.
Your hubby needs to MAN UP and provide for his own family without Mommy & Daddy. Even if it means a second job.
There is no price to great for the pride of standing on your own two (four ... soon to be six) feet!
At the VERY LEAST you should be paying rent to your in-laws - even if they put the money in an account to put towards your own place.
They are trying to CONTROL you - and that doesn't mean they are bad or not loving - but want to help to the point of not letting go. Living with parents is fine for a short term housing problem but it MUST not be your long term solution. And if you don't get out before the baby comes you never will. Then they will start to think b/c you live with them they have a say in how you raise your child and the list will go on.
2007-02-21 16:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by apbanpos 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Apartments usually mean you are paying rent; rent is a waste of money. You don't get a return on your investment. If you are expecting a baby, then you should look into buying a home. Save for a few more months and then get a place a few months before the baby comes. Even if it's small, it's better then renting. You could fix your home up nice and then sell it for more then the purchase price. Take the money you earned and put it towards the home you have always wanted.
2007-02-21 16:12:39 · answer #3 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think if you're married and expecting a child, you're starting a family, and you need to be able to financially support yourselves and the baby that's on the way. If your married and not expecting a child, you're still starting a family (you and your hubby) and need to be able to financially support yourselves. That means living away from parents and paying your own rent.
Having said that, if doing so will put an undue burden on your finances--say one of you is still in college, then maybe living with parents is the best solution. It will really depend on your financial situation, and how supportive his parents are. They may be glad that you guys are married, and are willing to have you living with them for that trade off.
But I don't think you guys wanting your own apartment is stupid, I think it's normal. Good luck!
2007-02-21 16:13:50 · answer #4 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think if you can afford to get your own place then you should. But, at the same time if you get along w/your in-laws why not save up the money to put down on a house instead of wasting it on an apartment. Also, think about the help you will have with the new baby..
2007-02-21 16:13:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get your own apartment and start building a life of your own outside of your parents. They may mean well but you are now married and about to start a family and you need to be independent of them and make your own decisions about how to live your life, whether or not that makes them upset.
2007-02-21 16:15:41 · answer #6 · answered by Cris 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the both of you feel it is time to leave then go. It matters what you guys think (you are married to each other not his parents) not what the parents think. Find a decent place that is not too expensive, a place that his parents would find suitable, that may help. It is ultimately up to you two.
2007-02-21 16:34:28 · answer #7 · answered by CGS 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think the parents have the right to tell you what to do. If you want an apartment get one. I think just married newlywed's need there own space. If you don't want to hurt there feelings tell them you just need your own apartment and you still love them and you'll visit them everyday.
2007-02-21 16:11:43 · answer #8 · answered by TLC 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You two together have to decide what you are willing to sacrifice...lose your sanity but save money while staying with his folks...or spend money on an apartment leaving less for saving and keep your sanity...You guys have to chose. And if you are really going crazy and about to snap on your in-laws...you need to get yourself an apartment in my opinion. It's better to have a happy marriage with minimal interference from parents/inlaws. If you are really really really tight on money, and can't afford to live on your own...then you have to make a decision to do your best on your part to get along well, keep peace with them in their house. make sure you talk to your husband to stand up for you to his parents if they bug you...you should not be the one to confront them on their offenses unless it's really really serious and can't be left alone for a bit. Discuss issue with your husband before going to them...he knows them his whole life and knows how they may react to this or that. It's always easier on the parent's ego to get scolded by your own son or daughter rather than a daughter-in-law or son-in-law...save your good reputation.
2007-02-21 16:23:08 · answer #9 · answered by CocoaGirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should of gotten your own place when you got married.
They just want to help you guys. But, they probably don't remember what it is like to be young and just starting out.
I don't imagine they lived with family.
Make plans to be on your own. Be sure you guys are a mutual front on this.
2007-02-21 16:19:10 · answer #10 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋