I am in college now and I have a boyfriend and we are thinking about getting married, but he has not proposed and i am going to go to medical school soon and i think we will be getting married soon (just a fealing) and i think that i want kids but i dont want to have to go to school and take care of kids.he wants kids
2007-02-21 10:19:09 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I went through the same thing when I went to college. I just wasn't ready to get married. We were already engaged, but I called off the wedding because I had your same feeling. It just didn't feel like the right thing to do. Especially if you're going to med school, you definitely don't need any distractions like what color flowers do you want, or when to schedule your bridesmaid's hair appts. Kids is an even bigger distraction! Get through school before anything else.
2007-02-21 10:22:32 · answer #1 · answered by Jen 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Since you didn't give a true question, let's go with a guess....
Just don't engage in sexual activities until you get married - the only way you can be assured that there will be no children. Medical school is a lot of years, so that's a long time to just be dating. Up to you, but I wouldn't be waiting -- what about all those cute interns you will be running into at med school? Give yourself time and some more life experience.
2007-02-21 14:10:06 · answer #2 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to go to medical school do that first, then get married later. You both seem young, so there is plenty of time for kids. If you value having a family over medical school, then get married.
However, give this a lot of thought. Ask yourself, If you get married now and not go to school, will you regret it later in life. Will you wake up one day to think, what if? If that's the case, then go to medical school, and have a family a little later.
2007-02-21 10:24:25 · answer #3 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why hurry and get married? Nix on the kids. For anytime soon at least. Kids are time-consuming and expensive. Why don't you get your life together first, then worry about whether you want to get married and then decide whether you want children or not. So many young people dive right into the marriage and children thing and it is REALLY better to wait. Get YOUR life together first. Then you will have a career and maybe a nice guy to share your life with and then you will have enough time to raise and love children as they deserve to be raised and loved.
2007-02-21 10:24:48 · answer #4 · answered by Keenu 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What is your question? If it is should you get married before medical school then I can give you my opinion about that. The process of going through medical school will result in a hugh transformation in every aspect of you. You will age physically. You will mature mentally. You will know a lot more about life and your career interests. You will no doubt end up moving many miles from where you live at least twice in the next 5 years. You will not have any time to build a marriage or family while in med school or during residencies. Your values will be different? Your likes and dislikes will be different? Your interests will change. Your sexual desires will change. Your vision of an ideal husband will change. You will get to know many different men during your training. Many of them will be very attractive and well adjusted and smart men who will have similar interests as you do, career-wise. You will need to be free when you finish med school to go where ever you want to do your residency and possibly your second residency. After all of this training you will need to be free of husband pressures to start your career anywhere in the world where you want.
Does it make sense to get married before you go through all of this? All of this could very likely cause you to divorce. Can you honestly say any husband could put up with you during all of these changes? Can you honestly think you could put up with the person you now think you love when you get through with all of this stuff?
Stay single for at least the next 7-9 years, then consider marriage.
2007-02-21 10:41:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Finish school and get on double birth control until you get out of college and have a stable job
You can get married now but wait a little while to have kids
2007-02-21 10:23:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wait until after med school. You would run yourself ragged trying to take care of kids and do everything else you've got to do. Get yourself together first, then start your family. The other way around, you're apt to put off your schooling and never realize your career goal.
2007-02-21 10:49:09 · answer #7 · answered by Happy Wife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he has not asked you to get married yet...don't rush marriage. Finish your education first, then when you marry, you will be a graduate and may be ready by then to have a family. If he asks you before...tell him you will marry him, but wish to wait until after you graduate from med school before thinking about having children. If he's not agreeable, then you may have to make a choice
2007-02-21 10:23:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, Ashley, if you were going to go into something less intense than medical school, perhaps it would be worth a shot to have both a career and children. In your case, it may come down to a choice of which do you want more. You can always have marriage and children (up to a certain age, I guess), but putting yourself through medical school needs to be done while you're young and still have the energy and learning capacity. Choose what would really make you happy (duh).
2007-02-21 10:26:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Take it slow..Tell your boyfriend that if he has any plans of marriage that it should be after Medical School if he wants kids. It is hard to take care of a child and go to school. I'm sure he'll understand. School is most important and it is a thing you should take seriously. Finish school first and then get on with your life. :)
2007-02-21 10:24:10 · answer #10 · answered by Tiffany 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋