I need advice. My boyfriend (now ex) and I were friends for 15 years and then decided to give it a try. We even moved in together but because he wasn't in the right mind frame to grow up (I guess) I left him. Now after 4 months of living on my own again, he is totally regretful and wants me back. I know some guys are idiots and don't mean things they say...but he is very sincere and I can feel that. he has changed certain ways of his because he realized on his own that he needed to grow up and wants nothing more than to prove that to me and be with me. I find myself doubting my feelings for him now. I know we would be so happy but I feel that the damage is done and I'm not sure how I feel towards him anymore. I loved him very much but seeing him be stupid and careless took the "I am proud of my man" feeling away - you know. Should I give him another chance and see where my feelings lead or just leave it alone. he never cheated just didn't like his decisions. help !
2007-02-21 07:49:39 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I say take a month 'trial period' so that he can really prove those things to you and show you how special you are. Let him pamper you, etc. If after that month (and oh ya during that month don't have sex...) he has really proven himself to you and you get that 'proud of my man' feeling back, then absolutely go for it! I think he deserves the second chance. I def. think 4 months was time for him to think and reflect and make improvemnts in his life. It only takes 21 (give or take a few days) to drop a habit or form a new one, so he's had time. Good luck and have fun =]=]=]
2007-02-21 07:55:57 · answer #1 · answered by *apes* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you honestly think without a doubt that it would work, go for it. If you find yourself in doubt, think before you act. make sure you are both making the right choice. If you love him and think it's worth a try, give it another try, or you'll never know. Talk to him, you should both figure it out and come to a decision together. After all, the relationship involves the both of you.
good Luck!
2007-02-21 07:58:02 · answer #2 · answered by I Might Even Be a Rock Star... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow what you believe is right for you....You are the only one who can make the call.....If you honestly believe he isn't going to do the same things again and grow up and believe what he says then take him back....If your heart is not truly there anymore then move on b/c if your feelings arent the same anymore then move on now before feelings really get hurt and you invest so much in your relationship.....Follow what you believe is right....Personally if it was a guy I knew real well and I could tell if he was telling the truth or not that would be how I would make my decsion.....so the question is do you believe he won't hurt you again...
2007-02-21 07:57:51 · answer #3 · answered by Baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he's really changed. He's showing you that you are more important than his previous choices/lifestyle. That's a big change and a sign of maturity. You should try to ascertain whether he's changed or not, by observing him and speaking with him about everything so far.
Also, maybe you need to reevaluate your own stance. Maybe your being too hard on him? Maybe there's some things you need to change.
I say if you have proof that he's changed, give it another shot. I hope this helps. Good luck.
2007-02-21 07:58:19 · answer #4 · answered by codenamex_47 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your doubting your feelings for him now, then you already have your answer: NO. If you don't like the decisions he made then, you will not like the decisions he makes today. If you get back together things will be good at first, but the same old bad habits of his you didnt like before will show up again. People can change their bad habits, but most often they don't and its whether the other person can deal with them or not.
2007-02-21 07:59:34 · answer #5 · answered by kingIII 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys can sometimes be immature...that's just a fact of life. Especially if you are under the age of 25 (If he's over the age of 30 then LET HIM GO because he had more than ample time to grow up!) Anyway, I say give it a try; you don't have much to lose by trying. Hell, he might even suprise you!
2007-02-21 07:56:27 · answer #6 · answered by Brinee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know if you love somone, you can just feel it even if they are dumb...15 years is a long time to waste...my b/f of 2 years needs to grow up sooo bad so i know how you feel, but i try and help him i put him on the right track, thats what you can do then you will get im proud of my man feeling back...i dont have that with my man but i know i will somday and he makes me happy so i keep working on things, relationships take work...and maybe he has relized how much you meen to him, he will probibly be better this time around, give it a try start things out slow
2007-02-21 07:55:04 · answer #7 · answered by CRAZY 8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you nevertheless have emotions on your ex? in case you dont have emotions, dont difficulty/sense accountable too lots! he's your ex boyfriend, you're sure to consistently think of a few issues he does are candy. Ive gotta say nonetheless....... if your boyfriend famous out i do no longer think of he would be happy! perhaps it may be ultimate in case you advised him your self, i think of he'd comprehend extra in case you heard it from you and he could additionally be waiting to help if youre perplexed approximately all of it! :) i'm hoping it seems ok!
2016-12-18 08:08:50 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should be on ur own for awhile. if u have the slightest doubt (which u do) about getting back with him, i think u shouldn't. u need some time to see what's out there and grow individually and then sometime down the line if u realize u two are meant for each other....then pursue it. good luck.
2007-02-21 07:54:28 · answer #9 · answered by Scotty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey as long as he never hit or cheated on you, and you think he has changed I would try it again. I would start off slow and no moving in with him. But some people do change and deserve another shot at being happy.
2007-02-21 07:53:30 · answer #10 · answered by Derek 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋