There is a bit of an age difference between my wife and I, 17 years to be exact. She will be celebrating her 29th birthday tomorrow. She wants to get a tattoo something simple that she drew a cross and a heart. not very big either. However I don't like them her brother was getting this for her as a birthday present. The way that I was raised the only females that got Tattos were barflies and biker girls. She said that if I found them that distateful that she would not get one. I feel that if I don't let her that she will be resentful later. Am I being a jerk by not wanting her to have one. I might also add that she has told me that it is her body and that she should be able to with it what she likes.
2007-02-21 07:32:55 · 16 answers · asked by Froggy_45 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Well, its nice that she said she wouldn't get one if you didn't want her to. BUUUUUT it is her body and if she wants one, maybe you should think about letting her get one. It doesn't mean the same stuff now as it did even 20 years ago. Mothers and grandmothers get them now to represent milestones in their lives & things. Its her birthday and that's a milestone. I have 5 tattoos. I'm a good girl who comes from a good family. I'm a mom. I'm not wild. My family doesn't like my tattoos, but I have them in places that can easily be covered if necessary. My future husband doesn't like tattoos so much. He's fine with the ones I have but doesn't want me to get any more. I can see where he's coming from though cause I have 5 already. If the tattoo she wants is tasteful and somewhere that she can easily cover it. I think you should maybe bend on this a little.
2007-02-21 07:41:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with its "her body" but if she is willing to let it go to please you How does it make you feel ? will you feel bad for being part of that decision of not getting it ?
I feel if the tattoo is something that she wants, its small discrete and not really noticeable or in your face would you be able to accept that ? Tattoos are not only for biker chicks or barflies
There are some really beautiful ones out there and very sexy
But again I have two Myself, an angel on My ankle and a rose on My shoulder
Hidden , small
I wish you luck and you both come to some sort of terms about this so there is no " resentments (for her) or no bad vibes " on your part
DominaPleasure
2007-02-21 15:43:45 · answer #2 · answered by Domina Pleasure 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You’re not being a jerk by not letting her get one, but it sounds like you do need to learn more tolerance skills. You must understand that some people like egg plant parmesan and some people don’t. In this case you happen not to like “egg plant parmesan”; that doesn’t mean that she shouldn’t eat it.
Relatively recently, tattoos became more acceptable when celebrities started showing theirs off. People that have tattoos and like tattoos find them no different than wearing jewelry or nice clothes. To them it’s just body adornment/ ornamentation.
You might want to bring up the subject of whether she’s going to get tired in the future, of the tattoo she plans on getting, and if the tattoo she gets might impede her from being employed sometime in the future. If she is a socialite and doesn’t have to work, ask her what people in her social circles will think of the tattoo. These questions will allow her to evaluate whether she wants to adorn herself with a tattoo in a clear way.
People need their space, and telling her she can’t get a tattoo is like telling her she can’t wear that dress because it’s too pretty. Does she tell you that you can’t hang on to those ugly tattered jeans that you love to wear so often in public? Then what makes you think you can tell her she can’t get a tattoo?
2007-02-21 15:59:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have three tattoos of my own and I have Milf written on my back needless to say my Ex bf didn't like that and kept threatening that he would remove it for me. My other tattoos are an angel and the other one is a combination of a heart cross pot leaf and a rose. I love them and it is a symbol of your part in this world remember everything is for a reason be a sport after all it is her body. My advice is to go with her to get it at least then you know where she is going. Good Luck
2007-02-21 15:40:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's right, it is her body. Tattoos aren't to every ones taste, but you've just insulted a whole lot of women, me included. I have a memorial tattoo for my mother, on my wrist, and I'm no "Barfly or biker girl" I think you should lose some of your snobbish ways
2007-02-21 15:45:53 · answer #5 · answered by Taylor29 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Man, I don't know, if you seriously hate them then let it be known. If it's not that big of a deal, just let her get it. I think if girls get tattoos, they need to be extravagent, expensive, quality work, and really sexy. Then I dig them. But little bull sh*t tatoos on girls, I hate. Also the lower back ones. I have 2 half sleeves myself but I'm not big on chicks with ink. I do, however, like girls w/ foot tattoos, half or full sleeves, and big tats across the rib cage. Sexy! I would say if she really wants one, invest some money and make it hot. Hope this helps. Peace!
2007-02-21 15:41:03 · answer #6 · answered by The Dude 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That may be the way you're raised but it's no longer true nowadays. Lots of people have tattoo's, it's nice. Try to not judge people on their appearance as much!
2007-02-24 00:39:02 · answer #7 · answered by Sheriam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing about the generation gap here. My husband is 17 years older than me too, and he loves tattoos. this is just your feelings about that and there is nothing worng. However, i would suggest to let her do what she wants. It will make her happy, plus she is not going to have it all over her body as i understood. And may be you can help her choose what you would like, and you will like it and find it sexy too.
2007-02-21 15:45:35 · answer #8 · answered by snowdrop 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that she will resent you if you don't respect her individuality. By the way, I have many tattoos and am a well educated and respectful wife, mother and artist. Let your wife help clear your mind of those stigmas. Let her help clear the air for all of us who just embrace art for what it is, especially if it's something that she designed herself.
2007-02-21 16:18:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well if you are married then every decision that either of you make will in someway effect your relationship, good or bad. If you guys were single or just dating, it would be easier to answer. i would say to her. go ahead and get one if its what you really want and he would have to either accept it or not. and i would tell you.. tell her what you think of them and she would have to decide if she wanted to respect your opinion or not.... but in a marriage you both have to live with the decision now so it has to defiantly be worked out for whats best for both of you. you cant be over controlling about what she does, but she also cant do everything that she wants, if you disagree with it.
2007-02-21 16:00:02 · answer #10 · answered by GunShow 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋