Man, does that irritate me. When my daughter was still in diapers, I got a lecture from a co-worker (no kids but "I have nieces and nephews") on how bad it was to use disposable diapers and a "good parent" would use cloth diapers and wash them. My wife had a childless co-worker (again with "nieces and nephews") go on at length about what a lazy parent she (my wife) is because we had child-proof doorknobs, a gate across the stairs, etc. and a "good parent" would be attentive enough and not need to child-proof everything, that's just being lazy. Grrr! Does this happen to other people too, or are my wife and I being singled out?
2007-02-21 05:18:17 · 17 answers · asked by Marc B. 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Now that you are a parent, everyone will want to share their opinions with you. Try not to take it personal. You and your wife will find what works for you and is perfect for your family. And don't be afraid to disagree with those giving you unwanted advice! Just say, "I couldn't disagree more!" They really don't know what they are talking about until they have children.
2007-02-21 05:26:31 · answer #1 · answered by BopMom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because it takes a village to raise a child and some of the answerers are right in that people like to participate however vicariously in parenting. Instead of being offended, be gracious and just say "Thank you for your advice, I'll think about it" But following your logic to make generalities, then how about a childless doctor or paediatrician, a childless child psychologist, teacher....Anyway, from my experience (mother,grandma,teacher) I'll give you a little unsolicited advice - use whatever is necessary to make your life easier and have more time to spend with your child(ren) and don't "childproof" your house 100% because the world is not a childproof place (the occasional small boo-boo is a mandatory learning curve). Teach them as soon as they can crawl and haul themselves up onto things the meaning of the word NO, HOT, DON'T TOUCH and you'll have a child you can take and enjoy anywhere. Happy parenting, it's the best job in the world.
2007-02-21 06:17:04 · answer #2 · answered by Just Me 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ha!
I love it when people with no kids tell you how to raise your kids. You know the funniest part is when they have kids!! Boy oh boy do they eat their words.
I'm a stay at home mom and I use all safety precautions. It is lazy and irresponsible NOT to. It only takes on minute for them to slip from your gaze and bang they fall down the steps and break a limb or worse. And, even the best parent can't follow the child everywhere. Talk about over bearing, and where do they learn their independance? They'd be attached to your legs until they were 8 years old.
I love it when people say, he needs a hat or it's too cold for that jacket, or don't you think he needs longer pants. I'm thinking, I'm sick of fighting him with his hat - his hood is wool with a very thick sherpa lining it'll work from the resteraunt door to the car (which my hubby pulled to the curb). And, why don't you buy him some new pants if your so concerned!
2007-02-21 05:30:51 · answer #3 · answered by Baby #3 due 10/13/09 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Geez! I know what you mean and before you freak out I'll say that I have no kids of my own but do raise my niece and nephews right now along with my parents and have on and off since their births (the oldest will be seven in March), depending on what "mood" their mother is in that month.
No. This happens to everyone and it ticks me off. I've had friends who've never had kids or experience with them at all, get on my case for giving my niece warm milk with vanilla, cinnamon and sweet n' low because I was "Basically just giving them poison!" And the gate/locks thing? That's just good parenting! You must be watchful and dilligent AND proactive. What does that lady do, take her kid with her and set her on her lap while she goes to the bathroom?? Kids get into stuff, it's totally normal and healthy for them to explore and as a parent we've got to let them learn by playing while also keeping them away from the under cabinet garbage can and cleaning supplies. I'm getting totally PO'd about this now! LOL
No, you're not being singled out. There are just lots of know-it-alls out there and since you have kids and kids/parenting are likely regular conversation topics, that's where they have to give their two-cents. Good parenting is not all about the details, it's about the overall health and happiness of a child and I couldn't give a rat's patootie what kind of diapers you use.
You could say, next time one decided to start in with that know-it-all nonsense about parenting, "Hey, let's talk about another topic of which you're equally as knowledge: rocket science." (Or some other topic that he/she has no clue about). Or you could just tell 'em to stick their nose in someone else's dirty diaper. LOL
2007-02-21 05:43:09 · answer #4 · answered by Wonderin' 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't have kids, never wanted to go down that road! But I'd never tell anyone else how to raise their kids. I have a childless great aunt who's a great one for telling other people how to live, so I learned to not do that from her example.
Perhaps your know-it-all coworker would like to help you out sometime and babysit, then you can put a cloth diaper on your child and let the coworker change and wash out the diaper. She'll change her tune and keep her opinions to herself after that.
2007-02-21 05:31:36 · answer #5 · answered by BobKat 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It happens by some people. I mean sometimes it's normal for some people to give advice based on what they've seen but this story is rediculous. I think these people need to be shut up in some way. I love disposable diapers. As long as you don't make a decision that endangers your childs life then nobody else should tell you whats right or whats wrong. Its your kid, you do what you want. Tell other people to shut up.
2007-02-21 05:24:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
People love to talk about what type of parent they will be until they actually have them. My personal favorite however, is the people who have a newborn who think because they have lived through one month with a child, they are now the experts. They have NO idea what's in the future for them. I just bite my tongue and smile to myself. I hope someday they'll sit there after their kids have torn their house to shreds and think " wow, that comment I made a while ago, I had no idea what I was talking about." Although they would never admit it.
2007-02-21 05:29:22 · answer #7 · answered by Melissa R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well me personally i have not had any childless people tell me how to raise my son but when it comes to my mother-in-law it is what you are talking about and it does bother me because i think i know what is best for my own child and i don't need any tips on anything. Yes it is irritating.
2007-02-21 05:25:35 · answer #8 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
even worse.. I actually have a sort of elevating my very own... i hate custody battles!! why can no longer that is even?.. i mean i'm basically as a lot his discern as his mom is.. so why does some individual who has by no skill raised a new child get greater say so than i do?.. no longer honest!
2016-09-29 10:27:23 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It happens all the time to me and my husband. My older brothers both without children try to tell me and my husband what to do. But since they are family I just tell them to be quiet because I have parenting down. That would be hard if it was a co worker I guess, I would just smile and nod.
2007-02-21 05:31:43 · answer #10 · answered by Shaz T 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋