I've been in a long term relationship- 2 years now and i broke up with the guy. i used to be popular and had guys eating out of my palm. I seem to have forgotten the rules of the game and the strangest thing is i do not remember how you're supposed to act on your own.
I have started a relationship a month ago and i seem to be unwanted. the guy says he doesn't want to break up with me and keeps the problems to himself...
And yes, i do not know how to get a guy, nor do i know how to handle this one...
What should i do?
2007-02-21 00:33:51 · 13 answers · asked by Madeline 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i am quite grown up, thank you, and i am looking for a mature answer, not fore someone to point the finger. that is easy to do.
2007-02-21 00:38:13 · update #1
oh, and i am looking for another long term relationship...and talking...well he don't say much at all
2007-02-21 00:47:44 · update #2
Sometimes, being in a long relationship sort of "breaks" our ability to just date. We just get used to having someone around all the time, and it's hard to have the independence and a true social life. And the game changes over time, so that what was the norm 3 years ago for single behavior might be totally different from how singles behave now.
My best advice is to do some dating for a while, and learn again how to be independent and enjoy yourself. Many areas have singles services and clubs. One nearby me is called "Just Lunch" and it arranges lunch dates for busy professionals, far less committment than an evening's dinner! Get out more, go to bookstores, walk around the mall, flirt with salespeople and people in line for movies and concerts.... Just interact with people of your own age, you'll figure out soon enough how the rules are nowadays.
Learn how to be single again before you look for a new relationship, or you'll bring the mistakes of the last long relationship into your next one, as unwanted baggage.
2007-02-21 00:40:09 · answer #1 · answered by Jarien 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder if your new boyfriend senses that all is not well and thinks the problem may be him or you are still attached to the ex? Anyway, beside the point. We don't need blokes to have a good time. I was single for a long time with just part-time not serious boyfriends to ease the biological urges. It was in some ways the best years I have had. Eventually, you start to enjoy all sorts of things by yourself or with friends only. However, I think because I was so happy and confident, men found me attractive and I was fighting them off even at my age! I am married now and that took some adjusting too but its been wonderful. I wondered if you wouldn't be better having some time to yourself and building up your confidence and enjoying singledom for a while - learn about you and concentrate on what you want. Men are naturally attracted to content women so eventually, when you are really ready, you could date again? Its just a thought.
2007-02-21 08:48:57 · answer #2 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dear ADELINE if u say u old then u should be able to handle urself during the period u going through so figure urself out,,,
u should understand that u recently got out of a relationship that is not just walking out u should remember that u should heal spiritualy,emotionaly and socialy,so i can say u rushed to a new relationship before u were ready for one,,i suggest u take a time out find urself, friends if u have some coz it seems u dont have any, hang out more and forget about man at the mean time...
be patient until u get ur MOJO back
GOODLUCK
holla me back
broderm2k@yahoo.com
2007-02-21 08:55:22 · answer #3 · answered by broderm2k 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i suppose the important question you both need to answer is what do you want from the relationship??? --- sit down and talk it out --- and while you say you dont know how to get a guy then know what to do when you do catch him ---- well you have one now you just need to decide if what you want is short term --- long term ---- or just sex ----- and what he may want as well ---- best wishes to you both
2007-02-21 08:42:04 · answer #4 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,give the relationship time to grow you are both only just getting to know each other which takes time.
2007-02-21 08:37:25 · answer #5 · answered by Ollie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk to the whoever the guy is and let him know that a relationship is between 2 people... it takes two to tango as they say.... also, be yourself... as cliche as this may sound, it still holds true...
2007-02-21 08:38:11 · answer #6 · answered by iceprincess 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't be self centred. Enjoy the guy's company or be on your own. I think you have a superiority problem.
2007-02-21 08:39:02 · answer #7 · answered by Pagan Man 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seriously. If you expect us to believe your story, then you have the cognitive ability of a cabbage.
2007-02-21 08:37:39 · answer #8 · answered by adreed 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd say I'm sorry, but i'd be lying, and you wouldn't want that, would you?
2007-02-21 08:37:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
grow up
2007-02-21 08:36:14 · answer #10 · answered by q6656303 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋