I need some advice about my neighbours, please?

Question

I live next to the most awful couple. They're in their 80's & still fighting fit, but their very presence makes me feel oppressed. They've not wanted anything to do with my child and I (I'm a widow) since the day I moved here 35 years ago. In fact, they don't want anything to do with anyone in our neighbourhood. I've tried every which way I can to 'break the ice' between us, but they remain hostile. They don't answer the door to anyone. It's like living next to the invisible couple, in fact. Anyway, he (the husband) cannot keep his hands off our dustbin. He keeps looking inside it, and transferring his rubbish from his own into ours. I got so fed up that I wrote & told him to keep his hands off our property. He's the type of person who doesn't like anything that doesn't belong to him on his side of the property, & the bin men often leave our bin in his drive after collection. Yesterday, he kicked our bin to my side of the drive, just missing hitting my car. What can I do?

Answer 1

I can't help but think those people are living in an old age hell of their own making. I would not bother to attempt to be nice to them, simply live and let live EXCEPT do report them to the authorities.
There is much to be said for not being involved with them socially. They sound like a couple of odd Prats indeed. 35 years and still unfriendly!!!

That takes the biscuit, it does!

--That Cheeky Lad

Answer 2

Put your bin as far away from his as possible,even if it's on the other side of the street to be collected.You can explain to the bin men WHY your bin is being placed acrossed the street or even ask a neighbor across the street if they would mine if you placed your bin there for the simple reason that that next door neighbor had kicked your bin almost hitting your car!! if they are un- ruley also then also call the trash pick up company and explian what's going on so that they can tell the pick-up bin men," not to kept putting your bin in his drive after collection" again for the reason that your car almost got hit by this rudely neighbor! Also if he ,(the husband neighbor) " KEEP'S STICKING HIS NOSE WHERE IT DOESN'T BELONG"............... then put something in your trash one time that he won't want to be looking in there again!"(which is some dog or cat droppings)!! I had the same problem and thats what i did and it worked,for peace in the neighborhood! and what can you do? As for the invisible couple, "breaking the ice" ,might t be because they are up in age and are set in their way's and just don't want to be bothered by any one and are private people, you too can be invisible too! Probably better this way not knowing those hostile ,neighbor's anyway! i find that if you keep to yourself you have less problem's with neighbor's~~~~~~~

Answer 3

LOL

Sorry, but it really sounds funny, although I realize it is not to you. Having inconsiderate neighbours can make you think very odd things to do to them I know I have.

Ignore them, they are set in their ways and really, you cannot change the way they behave or think. It is not your responsibility to break the ice.

As for the dustbin, I would be tempted to tape a note on their front door - bit block letters for everyone to see.

Catch him in the act, take a photo of him full in his face (get one of those disposable cameras). If he does kick your bin into your car, call the police.

They are elderly, however, this is not an excuse to behave badly. They ought to know better.

Answer 4

They have made it clear that they do not wish to interact with any of their neighbours so try to pretend thay are not there. Many elderly people become very insecure & possessive about their property & space. Try to be tolerant but also try to place your bin where he cannot get to it. If he persists with putting his rubbish in your bin then you will have to approach the local council, explain the problem & get them to write to him.
Try not to let it all get to be too much of an issue & relax a little.
Also, they are in their 80s so, without being unkind, how much longer will you have to put up with it?

Answer 5

For the rubbish problem, they do sell special carts to hold a couple of cans, If you push your cart out to the curb with your cans in it, the collectors will more than likely put them back in the cart when empty. In fact, here's one for about $20: http://www.homedepot.com/prel80/HDUS/EN_US/jsearch/product.jsp?pn=100088184

If he starts going through your trash again, try to catch him in the act and go out there and tell him to get off your property. Don't be afraid to be assertive. They obviously won't respond to being polite.

As for the other issue, they are just unfriendly hermits. It's unfortunate but a lot of people are that way, and there's nothing you can do about it. I would just forget they were over there and get on with your own life. Don't give them another thought!

Answer 6

Phone the council and explain that you have a problem with your neighbour and could they please make sure your bin is put back properly. Add a note to the bin - stop and speak to the binmen if you have to.
And I'd write anther note tot he neighbour, telling him you have asked the council to take more care, but you are not responsible and please not to kick the bins anymore as they could damage your car. And if this happened, you would hold him liable for repairs.
The man is a pain, other than moving, there's not much you can do.

Answer 7

It probably is being abused because i know it's a pup but really pups don't just keep trying to escape at least 5 times well least when my all my dogs were pups they haven't done it that many times and one time my pup got out and me and my parents couldn't find her and the next day she was barking her head off at our door you should see what you can find out and if u think the dog is really starting to get abused you should call the RSCPA or some shelter or a vet or someone to collect the dog sash.

Answer 8

You should not attempt to be social towards them as you have already had negative results in that direction.
If the business with the bins worries, annoys or upsets you in any other way, you should record events in a diary, you can then visit solicitor, and tell them your problem.

Answer 9

I would contact citizens advice & then the council, especillay if as has been stated in the news that there are plans for each household to be charged by the kelo on how much rubbish is colected from each house.

Answer 10

Well, you sound a wonderful neighbour. I wish I had neighbours as lovely as you sound. Look, you've tried with them, they've thrown it back in your face. It must be pretty hard bringing up a child single handedly and your neighbours sound too insular to know! I'd suggest you move and if he damages your property, then I'd contact your council. Keep up your loveliness though!