I cant even explain the pain that I am going through right now, I have a tear to my eye while writing this. I am finding it VERY hard to move on. I met this guy 8 months ago, me 24 he 28. We gelled RIGHT FROM THE START. We were like best buddies as well as lovers, he said to me at the time that he wasn't looking for a relationship right now, but if anything changes he will tell me etc. So we got closer and closer, and got to a point where he wouldn't get intimate with me anymore after 1 0r 2 occasions as he didn't want to hurt me ot lead me on which use to frustrate me!! but I didn't understand. Then over the months we started getting even closer so we started talking about starting something but taking it slow. But then he would go through a fase of not acting like the perfect boyfriend, probably because he just WASN'T in the frame of mind. So we would argue and then the final break up was in december where he would say lets be friends for now temporarly as it is not fair on you.
2007-02-20 20:24:28 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I guess that it was my fault for still sticking around, but then he was during the time very indecisive as to what he wanted. It was like he was in a catch 22 situation, he wanted me, but he didn't want any ties or to settle down. But during this time I have falling in love with him. I haven't told him this. and over the break up he did say that I was perfect for him I have intellect,vivaciousness and a great sense of homour and if he was looking for someone then I would be the one, but he won't lead me on right now!! I am trying so hard to move on and it is killing me! He called me the other day to see how my new job was going etc. It is like he is still keeping in contact as he does still like me, but will not be forced to commit as he doesn't want a relationship. I just feel like in the furture that I couldn't be with him if he wanted as he has really hurt me bad!!
2007-02-20 20:29:16 · update #1
You will get over it..He just was not the right guy for you. You will find another guy, and you will move on, and in a few years you will look back and smile..So:
Forget by: Playing with your pet, going out with friends, and take a guy break
2007-02-20 20:30:04 · answer #1 · answered by diamond_moon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem like you are really in love with him and I don't doubt that you are! At the same time, it seems like you really expected more from him even though in the beginning he did show some obvious red flags that he wasn't looking for a relationship! I went through something very similar (we broke in November and we were together for about 8 months as well!) but with very different details, I suppose. The main thing is that your relationship seems even toxic and very unhealthy- and you also seem like you're not very fulfilled and feel like crap because of this entire drama, this major pain and emptiness! I would stay away from him if I were you! But if you can't, try to see him less and less... he might even be using the word "friend" as a label or cover-up for the same relationship cycle. Try and do your own things, enjoy some hobbies and activities alone as things pan out or whatever comes! Good luck to you and take care!
P.S. DON'T answer his phone calls and don't give into him like that! For some reason that doesn't work well with exes even if they DO still care about you, hell if you do your own thing and not communicate with him for awhile then he WILL be wondering about you and would want to be with you! I always see this happening!
2007-02-21 04:31:20 · answer #2 · answered by purringout 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was very fair to you by being honest from the beginning. It is time for you to move on THROUGH the hurt. That's the only way to get back on track. Of course it's painful but there is life beyond the failing of a relationship even if both of you were on the same page for awhile. Next time, listen carefully to what is said as well as what is not said. Not every guy will be as honest as this one. You need to learn to protect your heart until you're sure you're both going the same direction at the same speed toward the same goal.
2007-02-21 04:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by missingora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just give him some breathing space and you also cool down. When your mind is cool, you can analyse your relationship carefully if he wants to be with you.
Continue to be friends with him and don't get angry.
2007-02-21 04:32:24 · answer #4 · answered by warrax 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will get over him, it will just take time. I guarantee this time next year you will be laughing about this and wondering why it bothered you so much
2007-02-21 04:28:40 · answer #5 · answered by ChocLover 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him go for a while...dont call him...dont email him..dont text him.. he is going to wonder why you arent wanting to talk to him..after a while hes gonna come back, they always do, you just have to stay strong!
2007-02-21 04:29:49 · answer #6 · answered by KOOSE 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do not understand your sex : m : f
Any way keep trying , men always are never happy with one
2007-02-21 04:30:16 · answer #7 · answered by TRADE DXB 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋