Parents only please?

Question

What are the advantages and disadvantages of having children? I would especially appreciate answers that a childless person would not think of.

Answer 1

disadvantage as mentioned is cost.

advantage is seeing the world thru the eyes of a child again after the world has beat the child out of you.

Answer 2

Advantages:
You're ALWAYS loved.
You love more than you've ever loved before.
You find that while your life seemed to have purpose before children that you were indeed wrong and there is no better purpose than parenthood.
You have a new appreciation for your spouse/significant other.
You loose your selfishness.
You gain education on health and risks that are taken, the way the human body works and develops.
You are PROUD of someone that you yourself have created.
You hear the word "mommy" or "daddy" and your heart melts.
You have a sense of self worth.
Where once you would have thought to pick up a bottle of Jack Daniel's or smoke a cigarette- now you think of the consequences "do I want to leave my children without a mother/father?"
You take better care of your body because you're concerned about your children's health thus you cook healthier thus you no longer live at the drive thru window.
You have more drive to do things- to go through with education or to get that promotion you've been wanting.


Cons:
Sleepless nights
"Mommy I think I'm gonna... (splat)"
exploding poopie diapers.
And that's all I can think of

Answer 3

the disadvantages to having children is that it is hard to have time for yourself, you have less money to spend on yourself, it is not as easy to just 'take off' for the weekend, you have to grow up just a little more.

The advantages are hearing your chid cry for the first time and then think that is the best sound i have ever heard, hearing your child playing and laughing, even the sleepless nights due to being sick or anything. You have this person that you will go without just to see them get what they need, and all you get in return for it is a hug and i love you, and that is all the payment you need.

having a child is different for everyone, i waited a long time to have mine. No matter how much money you make, it is never enough. It is a big choice you have to make, do what you feel is best. And you will make the right choice.

Answer 4

Well as for disadvantages you will have less time for yourself or your spouse. Some parents experience trouble with work due to the fact that not all employers are understanding of the fact that children get sick and your spouse may not always be able to take your child to the doctor. Children are an extra expense with clothing, food and medical/dental insurance.

On the topic of advantages, it's very rewarding to have your baby go from this little newborn who cant do anything for him/herself grow up into this person that can speak and take care of themselves. My son is going on three and I feel so much pride with him when people mention how well he speaks or when he uses his manners. I feel good because I know that my husband and I are the main reasons that he's that person. I can tell you that you'll never love anyone as much as you'll love your children.

Answer 5

Having children is the most wonderful gift you can give yourself. Sure, there may be some disadvantages like being pregnant for 9 months and having to go through the baby stage with the crying and such, but those are all temporary things and will all go away. I have a 3 year old and a 4 month old and they are the best gifts from God and I wouldn't trade them for the world. You will thank yourself later when you have children. if you don't have children, you will always ask yourself the question: 'What if'. You will miss a wonderful opportunity.

Answer 6

Hello,
Let see how can I explain it....
(Only my opinion here)
It's like this- If never had Christmas in your life you won't miss it (May wonder what it would be like, but defiantly wouldn't miss what you never experienced)
Now if had- Christmas every year, the big dinner, gifts, tree, friends and family. The big Holiday that you always look foreword to!
(Now for whatever reason you no longer celebrate Christmas, no family, friends, no tree, gift exchanging and no big dinner in Dec. You or I would feel so empty inside)
Get what I'm trying to say? My kids are grown up and we were so empty, a feeling of lost and what to do now?
Then my faith we adopted 4 years ago, at our age. Man talk about a adjustment but wouldn't change it for the world. She fills that empty feeling and the rewards are so greatly appreciated.
Her warmth, to know that you gave love, warm to a child that needs only this, no not hate. It is everything to see the glow on her face. The whole family is all united as one whole.
I feel like the richest person in the whole world.
You can't put a price tag on Love.
Now that's advantage, and well taken advantage of!
The disadvantage is not being able to just walk out that door any time you chose and I find myself lacking in things and places we could have went or could afford if not the smaller child.
And that's peanuts to us!
Oh yes adisadvantage- We have to watch our tongue at times. Oops
Thank you
^j^ Sandy ^j^

Answer 7

Advantages:
Absolute, unconditional love, like you've never felt before. The feeling that you have someone to care for and love. The joy of being able to bring up a well educated and well adjusted person, even in this world! Their first smile, words, steps. The feeling that your heart could burst because you love them so much. The sudden understanding of how your parents always knew what you were up to as a child! The cuddles. When they reach out and hold your hand.

Disadvantages:
Sleepless nights, and that's not just for the first few weeks, that's for the rest of your life... Less time as a couple. No more late nights and calling in sick, you still have to get your child to school... The arguements as they get older. Answering back. The cost. The worry. Three (or more) in a bed made for two!

CG.

Answer 8

OH MAN...long answer to follow:

I did not have kids until I was 30. I just figured I never would and was content with that. Then I had our first one...a son. You can not even imagine. I would not go back to not having kids for anything. These are concepts that are hard to verbalize, but I will try.

Everyday with a child is an adventure. Sure you hear horror stories from exhaused parents, and I have some too...Let me try to explain... have you ever been to a foreign country, and everyting is funny, strange, new and you want to explore around, see things touch things and try things - that is how every day is with a child. Everything is new, and to be tried. Even the most mundane item is new to them. It is fun to watch them experiement, touch leaves, look at different rocks and realize they are different, figure out how to use a door knob, learn new things.

Something else? The tremendous amount of pride and accomplishment you feel. You feel it when they do something good, when they learn something you are trying to teach them, when they say HI DADDY!!! after you have been gone even for 5 min., when they are the one they look to for guidance, answers, and boo-boo kissing.

Still need more? Love. I know you *probably* love your parents unconditionally. I am sure you love your significant other ALOT. But you have NEVER experienced anything like the way a child loves you. It is pure love, true unconditional love and the only way to experience it is by being a parent. You want to know what it feels like to be a superhero? Have a 3 year old.

More? I am glad you asked. Having child(ren) is more fun than you can imagine. The things they can come up with...you will laugh about them for the rest of your life. Their attempts at logic, reasoning, persuasion are priceless. They are comics. They don't try to be, but it is way too much fun.

Last good - nothing in my life has ever MADE me want to change. Now, I go out of my way to be the best that I can, because I know that my kids are watching everything that I do, and they will learn those behaviors. I used to be a mean, hard-partying, hard charging, hard-working, hard-drinking, selfish, prick of a human. The day the first one was born, it was like a light switch. Change, right now. To quote a movie - they make me want to be a better man.

OK. Now the bad. MAJOR life changes. Plenty of lost sleep. You can forget about having a clean house, car or nice furniture anymore - for several years anyway. They can be plenty frustrating - always repeating things, always climbing on you, always needing your undivided attention. Making messes, splashing all the water out of the tub, getting pen marks on things, asking why constantly, not eating at meal time, and being hungry when it is not meal time, breaking the DVD player, needing your help, relapsing to prior stages, forgetting, not being able to find things, causing you to be late, EVERYWHERE, needing to pee at very inopportune times. But, alas, 5 min. later, they are making you laugh again and all the bad melts away.

Let me share this story, and that will be it. My mother was diagnosed with cancer when I was 14. I am the youngest of her 5 kids. The docs told her she would live 2 years without radiation treatment, and 5 - 7 years or so with it. She choose to have the treatment. The treatment wasted her immune system, fryed her lungs, killed her taste buds and salivary glands. I never understood why she would have chosen to live an extra 3 or 4 years SO absoutely miserably. I even debated her on the subject. She would often cry at the dinner table, because everything - her favorite foods - tasted like "sucking on a penny". I always thought she had made the wrong decision. That was 20 years ago. My oldest -my son is now 3, my daugher is now 1. The first day I saw her hold my son, I understood completely why she choose to be miserable for those 20 years. She saw me graduate high-school, join the army, become a man, graduate college, get married, and have children. I literally appologized and told her I now understood why she chose what she did. I would do the same thing for an extra 2 years with my kids.

I hope I helped you get it.

Answer 9

Having a child is a wonderful, beautiful expierence.It's worth more then any othe rmoney in the world.Disadvantages: i can go one forever, hmmm well you have less time with other people(friends, husband, family,etc..,yourself),less money to spend on yourself(someone said this above),you live with a BIG MESS and when its clean its only for a second,you have to wash you stuff over and over again as well as the kids'(they play dress-up and get dirty easily),your friend and family are stolen from you by the kids,ya wake up at 2 to take the kids to the potty and you never get a REAL rest.Kids are the best gift a mother can aks for and when that proud moment comes(hasn't come for me yet)you can be holding your wonderful child's child...your grandchild,another advantage you can be a grandma.

Answer 10

You cannot make child bearing decisions based on weighing the advantages against the disadvantages. If one really sat down and did that, if they really considered the pros and cons and the dedication it takes to properly raise children, there wouldn't be any new births....It is the most difficult "job" in the world....IT is also the best thing you will ever do in your whole life if you choose to have children and raise them into fine human beings.

You either want a child or you don't. Either way is perfectly fine but don't make the decision on the basis of your criteria here.