my boyfriend is wanting to joing the army and it is something he has always wanted to do but he wants me to go

Question

with him, we have two children together, and i think that it would be hard for me to take them away from our parents, but it is something he has been wanting to do and i want him to be happy, can someone tell me if they would let me and our 2 children move on base with him, and what would it be like for us? how much money would he be making? hes wanting to jump out of plains.... im just not sure if i want to move out of my home state. what are the chances of him have to go to iraq if he joins? i want him to go.. im just scared... i need some help... if anyone could help me i would be really glad....

Answer 1

Lady, this not a picnic! you're talking about, think hard.

Answer 2

First of all, you would have to be married to join him in living on base and that would be difficult as a junior enlisted man. While the pay is good for a starting position in any company, it would be difficult for you to live well for a couple years, until he made some rank. For the first year you would not get to live with him at all because he would be in basic and advanced training, with or without Jump School. There is always a good possibility he could be sent to some foreign country, not necessarily Iraq, which is dangerous and where you and the childern could not go. But, I would not trade the 20 years I spent in the military for anything else. He may not like it after he gets in and only spend the initial enlistment, you never know til you try.

But, for sure, you can't go with him if you are not married, at least not officially. You wouldn't be able to get ID cards and use any of the base facilities such as commissary or housing and he would not get any housing allowance for you to live off post.

Hope I have been helpful.

Answer 3

I suggest that you and your boyfriend regularly visit some military or veterans' hospitals and do some research on how severely wounded soldiers are treated; you have to prepare for the worst, not just advantages. I saw a report on the news tonight on the substandard conditions in which wounded soldiers at Walter Reed are waiting for treatment. Spend a few weeks visiting and talking to wounded soldiers and their families.

Also consider that it's not easy to get out of the army now, even when the original enlistment time is up. Considering that, I'd make a list--an actual chart-- of what your goals are and of various ways they can be met, including ways other than the military, and of the potential positives and negatives of all the ways to achieve them.

Be aware that if your boyfriend is killed his benefits won't necessarily go to you or even to your children.

It's normal and wise to be scared about such a serious decision. Just take the time to think about it and discuss it fully. Make sure you know all the answers before deciding, and don't ignore your or your children's needs and wishes, and make sure your boyfriend really knows what he wants. He may have always wanted to join the army, but things aren't the same now as they were when he was a kid, and he may not have really thought about the consequences.

Answer 4

I'll be straight forward with you....if he wants to join hunny he will. There's no getting around it. Him wanting to go with an Airborne deal makes him an eligible canditate for many different places (including places all over the world.) I say it's a good expirience for him and if you're willing to part ways with him for alittle time while he attends basic, AIT, and Airborne school it will benefit you greatly. If he's looking for an Airborne Infantry type deal, the time apart will be roughly 5 months. Although the Army isn't the best paying job, if you have children it really helps when it comes down the insurance as the Army is very benevolent when it comes to depedants that you have custody of. Get married. Also, go to a recruiting office and talk to the recruiters with him. Alot of people here on Yahoo have never even served they just give their opinion because they think they know whats going on.

As for Iraq.....he'll end up going eventually. Everyone in the Army will go to the sandbox. And I'm not joking, as I'm getting ready to head out for my second deployment in 9 days.

Answer 5

It is scary to just up and leave everything you know, but military can be great if you know what to expect. The only thing is... it's almost impossible to know what to expect because military life is pretty unpredictable. The chances of him deploying to Iraq are very good and you will have to take care of your kids alone. There are a lot of benefits, such as seperations pay and housing... but there is the heartache and stress of it all. I don't know your current situation, so maybe this will be good for your family... My husband just got back from Iraq and he volunteered to go, because it's something he just had to do. Maybe it's the same with your boyfriend... he'll regret it if he doesn't and since you're a family, you should support him... Good luck!!!!!!

Answer 6

Well: I won't sugar coat it!
If he starts out as an E1, He'll make about $1000 bucks a month. It goes up from there with rank and years in service. You need to understand that alot of those jobs offered by recruiters are nice and exciting to look at, but in reality you probobly won't be doing them or at least all the time. You mentioned that you have children. The first thing you'll have to develop is something called a dependent care program. You'll get about 30 days after arriving at your first duty station to come up with this. After that, you will get regularly scheduled counseling statements to ensure that you understand the rules and regs and the ramifications of violating them. After you recieve about three for the same thing, You will usually end up with something called an Article 15. This is where you will lose pay and possibly rank and possibly have to be restricted and things like that. After you get your affairs in order and are using public assistance to buy your food and child essentials, you will have to endure Army housing if it's available. This is usually run by the worst landlords on the planet. You may forget to cut your grass now and then, don't worry, someone will drop by your house and tell you about it and then give you a warning with a return for another inspection and with a little luck, you may lose your housing for non-compliance. If you decide to live off-post in a rental area or place of that sort; get ready to pay through the nose to all those wonderful people who have retired from the military and own the house you live in. These people keep track of current pay scales and know when you will be recieving a raise or allowance. This is when they raise your rent. Usually every year. If you decide to both join and come up with a family care plan, get ready for child care. You ususaly would get reduced rates offered to military family members but you'll still pay about 3 to 400 a month. You could use a private baby sitter but the Army consideres them non-reliable. If you are late picking them up once , maybe twice due to military duties, don't worry, the caregiver you use will be sure to call the child protective agency to help you through the rough spots. If you get the opportunity to deploy and you probably will, more than once. You'll get extra pay which usually works out to not paying taxes for the deployment. I would suggest you understand that joining the military as a change in lifestyle is not a step up, it is a step over.
On the other hand, You will have the opportunity to travel to Europe and or the Far East if you want to. You and your spouse will be stationed jointly if you apply for it. You can actually recieve a bonus for joining if you choose the right job. It can be rewarding if you do it the right way.

Understand this: You will lose all sovereign rights as an individual. You belong to the Army, It's like having the strictest parents around. They will keep you out of trouble if you listen. Unfortunately sometimes you can't always answer the question because you don't know what the question is.

I told you I wouldn't sugar coat it.

I have been in over 20 years. I have seen quite a few things and been deployed quite a few times. I've earned my Bachelor's degree and Masters. All my kids will be going to college. Things can work out for you if you understand that you must ask yourself many questions before you make any decisions.

It is tough, but then most things in life are.

Answer 7

First of all ,he won't be stationed at a permanent base for at least a year if not more.
He will be going through extensive 2 month training in basic,where family will not even be allowed to see him during that time.
After basic he will be going through more training,although he might have a choice of where they might send him.
The probability is pretty high that he will serve some tours in the Middle East ,Iraq or Afghanistan. My nephew has been in the Army since July and he is still going through more extensive training and he living on the base in the barracks ,he has been assigned a roomate.
Base housing for families does not even become a factor until he has served in the Army at least a couple of years where he will be assigned to a permanent base,which could be overseas in Korea,Phillipines,Germany,Italy.etc.
Good luck and he will counting on your to keep his family together with emotional support during this long ordeal.
Have your bags packed and ready to go wherevere they send him.
Some overseas bases do not allow family to travel there for obvious reasons. If he has to serve overseas ,he should pick Germany if he even has a choice.

Answer 8

Ah, the military....

As a girlfriend/fiance you are nothing to the military. If your children are his biologically than they will receive health care. They can live with him on base. You will not receive any privileges (commissary (grocery store), gym, healthcare, educational benefits, housing, etc.) and everything else that comes into play for signing on to be a dependent of a military member. As a spouse they will move you (and all your stuff) along with him to the next duty station. As a fiance/girlfriend - you will pay out of your own pocket!

If your husband is married and you move with him to his duty station (even if he starts out as an E1), he will qualify for base housing. If base housing is not available, you will receive BAH to pay for adequate housing in the area.

My husband joined the Air Force in 2005. We were married 3 weeks prior to his enlistment. When he completed training I moved on base with him to Hawaii. He has deployed to Iraq and is now back, safely, thank god.

If he is joining the Army, its not a matter of IF he will deploy. It's more of a when he will deploy. If he does decide to join, RESEARCH RESEARCH RESEARCH his career choice!!!! That will give you the best idea of what your time as a military member will be like. If you can, find people online who share the same MOS (career).

As a spouse of a military member you will learn to put up with and listen to just about everything. You will quickly learn that what you are told one minute does not hold any value the next. It's seriously the biggest challenge I've ever gone thru. I've held the "fort down" at home for over a year without him. Written letters, written emails. Sent the pictures. Perks? Our marriage is extremely strong. I can confide in my husband thru anything despite any distance. Would I rather he not be in the military? You bet your butt! However, we know this is a temporary move for us and we're counting down the days until he is done his enlistment and we are back into civilian life. But we are saving and planning to make our dreams come true. The military will be a stepping stone for bigger and better things for us.

Best of luck.

Answer 9

I am an army wife and i will tell you that you have to be married to go anywhere with him and to get health insurance for you. Your kids will have health insurance as long as they pass the manditory paternity test. the chances of him going over there depend on his MOS which is his job and whether or not he is going active or reserve. I will tell you that they are taking reservist and national guard before active. the chances of him going if he is active is about 65%. the chances if he is reserve is about 98%. Keep that in mind. It is a very honorable thing to do. Just support him through it all and try to keep his mind clear of any problems. Trust me the pay is awesome if you are MARRIED! If you want all the benefits of the army. GET MARRIED if you really love him.

Answer 10

Wow you and me are the main opposite relationships i desire it each and all of the time and he does not."Wanna swap?" JK I does not sense reliable the two way. My bf is 33 and that i'm 25. each in specific situations it makes me sense like i'm no longer suitable adequate and he isn't any longer drawn to me. We communicate approximately it and he says he loves me and that has no longer something to do with it. Then we start up up speaking approximately him in all hazard being bored w/ me and wanting some thing else and he swears up a down he loves me. To make a protracted tale short, he has gotten slightly extra effectual and that i comprehend he has intercourse w/ me extra beneficial than he desires to. once you're in a courting you will possibly be able to desire to fulfill someplace in the middle. elementary guy or woman has intercourse like 3.5x each week i'm fortunate to get it in simple terms 1x each week.

Answer 11

You should be proud of him!! Yes you should go, its something you will never experiance in your life. Do you love him? You guys need to be married though, in order to be able to move with him. It isnt easy but in life you need someone to support you no matter what. I hope you and him have a great life together. I am proud to hear anyone wants to join the military. You will be in good hands. 2 kids? you guys will have fun. If you are attached to your parents then its time to fly the coop. Your kids will see them dont worry. You ought to be ashamed of yourself...... He needs your support. He is doing it for 1 of 2 reasons. he loves his country or 2 he thinks its the best for you and the kids. Now a days with divorce just as popular as marriage, I dont think you have to be married to the one you love. Actually I have mixed emotions about that... If you guys love each other you should be Married. But anyway, You gus have to be married in order to rate any kind of support from the Military. Although your kids will rate it no matter what. You guys need to be married for things like your medical, dental, and base housing. I wish you the best of luck! I really do. Satand by your mans side the same way I hope he would. Be proud of having a Soldier!