Why do people treat there oldest child like sh-it?

Question

yes i am the oldest child and my little brother and sister never get hollered at my little brother shoved my toothbrush up his *** and didn't get hollered and shoved a book down the toilet nothing happened to him!but if i was to do that i would get bit-ch-ed out!

Answer 1

I'm an oldest child and, in experience, I had to take the hit to "pave the way" for my younger brother (4 years younger). My parents always set the toughest rules for me due to fear of what would go wrong if they didn't set enough rules then, once they learned from me they could give more privileges at a certain age and still be safe, they let my brother have those privileges at that age.

So in my case, and I'm sure many others, my brother always had advanced privileges 3-4 or so years before I did (IE he got the same privileges I had when I was 15 when he was 12).

And, guess what, since he had more privileges he had more chance to learn more and develop more socially for his age. So he became the popular capable one, in my parent's eyes, and I became the dork. Also I was the troublemaker, because I had to "rebel" to get decent privileges, while he just coasted along on the privileges I "earned" for him and never had to rebel. I picked up guitar at 13, he copied me by doing it at about the same age. And yet, when he was about 15, he got to go out and do gigs at that age and get popular for it...while I never did and was forced to do more school work instead at that age (by the time I was allowed to I was already in college and didn't have as much time to fool around with it).
SO, JUST LIKE WITH YOU, IF I BROKE THE SLIGHTEST RULE OR TRIED TO GET THAT EXTRA BIT OF FREEDOM TO GET IN SITUATIONS I MIGHT MAKE MISTAKES IN, IT WAS ALWAYS MY BEING THE TROUBLE-MAKER, WHILE MY LITTLE BROTHER GOT THESE PRIVILAGES FOR GRANTED AT THE SAME AGE...WITHOUT HAVING TO PUT UP A FRONT TO GET THEM.
Not to say "woe is me", but just to say he had more ways to express himself because "the coast was clear"...and I regret it because I could have become a smarter person had I been allowed to take the risks and learn for myself like my brother did.

So being the oldest child means you often are the troublemaker and have less privileges and get to be less daring...at the same time (kind of a double-standard, eh?)

But, don't worry too much, by the time you are 20-something none of being the older one will matter much anymore and, for once, you'll get to choose your own destiny and take reasonable risks without being made to feel guilty or dumb about it. Needless to say confronting your parents about the issue and stating confidently you think it's unfair and giving examples should help your case in the meantime.

Just hang in there....

Answer 2

Actually I am the secound to the last child, there was four of us. But after my two brothers moved out, well I was the oldest. But for some reason I got treated like that no matter what. I was the child that mother have do every thing. Clean cook, take care of my little sister. When my brothers were at home I had to wash their cloths. So in a way I understand, but not totally.

Answer 3

hehehehe are you the oldest child? lol, i'm the oldest child, and while i have had to shoulder extra responsibility seeing as how i was kind of like the guines pig and my parents were learning so i was the one they were learning from making it easier for the next ones coming. however i don't think i was treated like **** just because i was the oldest. i hadmore responsibility in regards to that i had to cook and clean a bit more, but then i was also allowed to do more.

Answer 4

we in the same boat sister
i say ppl should be made to only have 1 child or if they have more, they be the same age like twins or so
its not fair
just cuz he is 4 and "doesn't understand"
he is fuking 4 and knows how to fking play an xbox!
and computer!
and i didn't know any of this shiat until i was like 10

Answer 5

not in my family the oldest is treated like a god. he gets a car for Christmas, insurance, and gas whenever he wants it. he does not have to pay for any thing. my parents never yell at him, they never blame him for any thing (even if he did something wrong. I am blamed). in every way possible they treat him like a god. they even pay for his college.
every thing is the opposite for me (the second oldest) I don't drive yet but my parents have told me that I will have to buy my own car, insurance, gas, college, books, and any thing else I want.

Answer 6

Since this is about YOUR parents why don't you ask THEM? Rather than making a blanket statment about everyone who is a parent? You can't possibly know how every parent on this earth treats their older or younger children. All you can go by is how YOUR parents treat YOU so you need to ask them.

Answer 7

Because they're not the "baby" so they don't matter as much.