Help They're Not Getting Along!?

Question

I just adopted a female short haired (calico colored) kitten on Saturday! She is 6 months old, spayed, up-to date on shots, and just had another check-up with the vet yesterday! She is not declawed! I also have a 5 year old male (polydactyl trait) Cat that is making her seem very unwelcomed! A couple years ago he was living with other cats (kittens even and was fine)! Now everytime he sees her or gets close to her he hisses and attempts to lunge at her! He smells her things but is very controlling towards her freedom (meaning he wont let her have any)! I know these things take time but Im a little concerned because she is becoming bold and wants to check him out and he isnt having it (he is normally a very sweet cat... my baby)! What are some subtle ways to bring them towards accepting eachother (she feared him deathly just 2 days ago but now she is getting ballsy and has had enough... She wants to roam and play)? They are seperated while Im at work!

Yeah we are for sure giving the older cat lots of love and attention! I dont seperate them when he hisses I just talk soothingly to him and sometimes pet him (he feels more comfortable and sided with when I do this)! My poor fatty (old cat) thinks he's being replaced when really I wanted him to have a friend for his lonely day hours!

Im just afraid he will hurt her! She is only 3.9 pounds and he is pushing 17-20 pounds! Both have claws... I dont declaw!

UPDATE!!!!!!!!! Guess what guys they became good and playful friends lastnight! Was weird but the kitten loves him and he loves plowing into her and making her tumble it a spurt of summersaults! Im shocked they made friends so soon since I just adopted her on Saturday! Thanks guys!!!!

Answer 1

This is normal behavior for cats, they will eventually get to where they will play with each other and become friends you just have to give them time. One thing you can do is sit down in the floor and play with them both at the same time, show them that you love them both. But no need to worry the cats may take a while to get along but they eventually will. For a while one of them may want to fight off the other but eventually the cat will get the idea that the other cat only wants to play, at first the play may be a little rough but that is just to show who is the domant cat around the house.

Answer 2

Tough situation. I do not envy you any. I went through this last spring. It was almost two weeks of cat on cat violence. My big fat old boy, Harry, was not too happy to meet his new friend, a tiny little female kitten. Harry was declawed before I understood what a rotten thing it is to do. The kitten has claws. Your older male cat does not think that he is being replaced, cats do not have those emotions. You are percieving it that way because that is how humans would react. He is mad because that is his house and now there is a stranger in it. Cats are territorial by nature and never like it when a new animal is in that territory. Just like wild cats in Africa, each cat has its territory and they will attack any new cat that wonders into that area. I am sure he roams the house a few times a day to check things out. He probably rubs against the couch and the side of the bed to leave his scent, these are both territorial behaviors. He will get over it. It is just a matter of when. The key is to not let him hurt her in the mean time. She has to approach him and get smacked down. She has to learn that he is the boss and that he calls the shots. The only way for her to learn that is for him to show her. Only one cat can be the dominant one. If they get into it and you think that he is hurting her you have to be willing to get in there and get scratched up. Although most of the time I find it does not get to that, it is a lot of hissing and growling. Maybe a swat or two and then one of them will run off. Good luck.
Remember - each cat needs its own cat box!

Answer 3

Put the kitten in another room with her food and a litter pan, make sure you spend time with both animals. Daily take one of your t-shirts (not yet washed) and rub it on the kitty then take it out and leave it with the male so he can smell both you and the kitty. Then do the opposite, rub down the male and let the kitty smell that. In about 2 days, stay with the kitty and open the door and let the male in for an hour or two at a time. Do this for a few days. By the end of the week, all should be well between the 2 of them.

Answer 4

It will definitely take time, but here are some tricks to help along the way. When you have your kitten in one room and your cat comes in, reintroduce them to each other by holding your kitten facing away so your older cat can sniff the hindquarters of your kitten. It is less threatening than full face contact.

Also, you can take a small drop of vanilla and rub it on all of your kitties foreheads. Then they all smell the same and for some reason this usually fixes the problem.

You can also take cat nip and rub a little on your kitten. Your older cat will warm up to her more.

These are some tips my vet gave me when I had new kittens in the house last summer. Good luck!

Answer 5

I'd like to spend my time here helping out, but the nasty answer from "Dragon" is a CLONE, & I'm cleaning up what he's done with his twisted mind. If you click on HIS you'll see what I'm talking about as far as his gross postings. He's now claiming I cloned HIM (he joined 2/19 & I've been on just about a year) & telling people to report ME. I'll get back to your question as soon as I can.

Edit: I'm delighted with your update! Basically, I was going to suggest what some of the others did--to give it time, because I've always seen that cats have a way of working this out by themselves, in time. I once had two strays I took in together. The female--Melissa--was a little ollder, but they'd already bonded. She watched over him like a mommy, but once she got carried away with a "love bite" & took a teeny piece out of his ear! She was so contrite after; just licked & licked him until I took care of it. They were both "fixed," but she'd lie on her back looking seductive, (eyes very narrow), & when he'd--in a gentlemanly fashion--approach her, she'd slap his face! I'm very happy for you!

Answer 6

A. DO NOT just leave them alone..... it can get serious. Who needs injured cats?
read on: this tried and true works.
This is invaluable info: borrowed from the HSUS. I post it here since “incompatibility” is one of the main reasons of return of adopted pets to our pound. Please read, it works wonderfully!

“Wouldn't it be nice if all it took to introduce a new cat to your resident pet were a brief handshake and a couple of "HELLO, My Name Is “Fluffy”? Unfortunately, it's not quite that simple, which means you'll need to have some realistic expectations from the outset. What are realistic expectations? First, it's recognizing and accepting that your pets may never be best buddies but will usually come to at least tolerate each other. Second, it's understanding the need to move slowly during the introduction process to increase your chances for success.
Of course, some cats are more social than other cats. For example, an eight-year-old cat who has never been around other animals may never learn to share her territory (and her people) with other pets in the household. But an eight-week-old kitten separated from her mom and littermates for the first time might be glad to have a cat or dog companion.

Cats are territorial, and they need to be introduced to other animals very slowly so they can get used to each other before a face-to-face confrontation. Slow introductions help prevent fearful and aggressive problems from developing. Here are some guidelines to help make the introductions go smoothly:

Confinement

Confine your new cat to one medium-sized room with her litter box, food, water, and a bed. Feed your resident pets and the newcomer on each side of the door to this room, so that they associate something enjoyable (eating!) with each other's smells. Don't put the food so close to the door that the animals are too upset by each other's presence to eat. Gradually move the dishes closer to the door until your pets can eat calmly while standing directly on either side of the door.

The Old Switcheroo

Swap the sleeping blankets or beds used by the cats so they each have a chance to become accustomed to the other's scent. You can even rub a towel on one animal and put it underneath the food dish of another animal. If there are more than two animals in the house, do the same for each animal.

Once your new cat is using her litter box and eating regularly while confined, let her have free time in the house while confining your other animals to the new cat's room. This switch provides another way for the animals to experience each other's scents without a face-to-face meeting. It also allows the newcomer to become familiar with her new surroundings without being frightened by the other animals.

Next, after the animals have been returned to their original designated parts of the house, use two doorstops to prop open the dividing door just enough to allow the animals to see each other, and repeat the whole process over a period of days—supervised, of course.

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

Avoid any interactions between your pets that result in either fearful or aggressive behavior. If these responses are allowed to become a habit, they can be difficult to change. It's better to introduce your pets to each other so gradually that neither animal becomes afraid or aggressive. You can expect a mild protest from either cat from time to time, but don't allow these behaviors to intensify. If either animal becomes fearful or aggressive, separate them, and start the introduction process once again with a series of very small, gradual steps.

You'll also want to have at least one litter box per cat, and you'll probably need to clean all of the litter boxes more frequently. Make sure that none of the cats is being "ambushed" by another while trying to use the litter box, and be sure each cat has a safe hiding place.

Try to keep your resident pets' schedule close to what it was before the newcomer's arrival. Cats can make a lot of noise, pull each other's hair, and roll around quite dramatically without any injuries. If small spats do occur between your cats, you shouldn't attempt to intervene directly to separate the cats. Instead, make a loud noise, throw a pillow, or use a squirt bottle with water and vinegar to separate the cats. Give them a chance to calm down before re-introducing them to each other.- gratefully reprinted from the HSUS.

http://www.hsus.org/pets/pet_care/our_pets_for_life_program/cat_behavior_tip_sheets/introducing_pets_to_a_new_cat.html

Answer 7

we had the same problem when my hubby brought home a new kitten the other cats wanted nothing to do with it, hissing and clawing at it when it came near . . but eventually they warmed up to the new kitten it took about 2 weeks now they are playing together

Answer 8

Just give it time. It may take a few weeks or a few months. I have never known any cats that got along right off the bat in just a few days.

Answer 9

hi been there done that. I brought in 2 six month old girls on my old boy. it takes time he barley hisses now and that `s all I heard out of him at first. Now he hisses at them when they are bad or when I correct them or if they get on his nerves. the other day he went up to one of them and kissed her. hang in there it does`nt happen over night but they will be best of friends soon enough

Answer 10

Leave them alone. They will work it out. When you pet or offer treats, alway pay attention to you old cat first. It will help establish who's boss.