what is your best joke?

Question

of all timne best joke you know. i hope it.s really funny lets see what you got. best joke gets ten pionts not much but all i can give

Answer 1

A nurse was on duty in the emergency department, when a punk rocker entered.

This young woman had purple hair styled into a mohawk, a variety of tattoos and strange clothing.

It was determined that the patient had acute appendicitis and was scheduled for immediate surgery.

When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff found that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it was a tattoo reading, ''Keep off the grass.''

After the prep and the surgery, the surgeon added a small note to the dressing which said, ''Sorry, had to mow the lawn.''

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An 8 yr old boy walks home from school each day passing an 8 yr old girl's house.

One day as he is passing by, carrying a football, he can't resist taunting the girl. He holds up his football and says, "See this football? Football is a boys' game, and only boys can have a football."
The little girl runs into the house and cries to her mother, "I want a football." Being a woman of the 90's, her mother runs out and gets her one. The next day the girl is waiting for the little boy and he rides up on his bike.

She holds up the football and says, "Nah Na Nah Nah". The little boy angrily points to his bike and says, "Oh yeah, well this is a boy's bike and only boys get boy's bikes and you can't have one."
She runs into the house for her mom. The next day the little girl is waiting for the boy on her new boy's bike.

The little boy gets furious and pulls down his pants and pointing to his most private of parts and says "Look, only boys have these and your mom can't buy you one!"

The next day he walks by and asks her, "Well I guess I showed you," to which she promptly pulls up her dress, points to her parts. The little girl proclaims, "My mother tells me that as long as I have one of these, I can have as many of THOSE as I want!"
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(this one is my best!)

Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the forest to deliver a picnic basket to her gramma.

Before heading out, her mom tells her, "Little Red Riding Hood, be careful. The Big Bad Wolf is out there and he will pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties, and f*ck your little red socks off."

Little Red Riding Hood takes a shotgun out of the closet and puts it next to her and says, "It's ok, I can handle it."

So, Little Red Riding Hood starts out on her journey. First she runs into the Three Bears.

They say, "Little Red Riding Hood, what are you doing out here all alone? Don't you know the Big Bad Wolf is out here and he's gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties, and f**k your little red socks off?"

To which Red Riding Hood shows them the shotgun and says, "It's ok, I'm covered."

So, Red Riding Hood continues on, and sees the Three Little Pigs.

They say, "Little Red Riding Hood, what are you doing out here alone? The Big Bad Wolf is out and when he finds you he's gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and f**k your little red socks off."

Red Riding Hood again, pulls out the gun and says "I'll be alright".

So, Red Riding Hood is walking and she sees none other but the Big Bad Wolf.
The Wolf says , "Little Red Riding Hood, I have found you! I'm gonna pull up your little red dress, pull down your little red panties and f**k your little red socks off".

Red Riding Hood pulls up her little red dress, pulls down her little red panties, lays down on the ground, points the gun at the Wolf and says "NO. You're gonna EAT ME like the BOOKS says!"

Answer 2

An Italian cop walks his beat,when he comes upon a black kid playing with sh%t. So, he looks over and says, "What are you doing? "I'm making an Irish Cop." the black kid replies. Stunned, The Italian Cop calls over his Irish partner and points to the kid. "Ask him what he's doinf?" And he does. "I'm making an Irish cop." The Irish cop is irate and fuming. "Why are you making an Irish Cop?" The black kids looks at him. "Because I don't have enough sh%t to make an Italian Cop."

Answer 3

haha properly good i've got been given a intercourse shaggy dog tale for you desire you like it :) on listening to that her grandad had purely died kate went and visited her nan to convenience her whilst she requested how he died her nan replyed by utilizing sayin that he had had a coronary heart assault jointly as makin love 2 her kate reported that it grew to become into stupid that 2 previous human beings the place havin intercourse because it grew to become into askin for hardship her nan replyed by utilizing sayin that they used to do it to the sluggish %. of the church bells because it grew to become into purely the final speed she then wiped a tear from her eye and carryed on by utilizing sayin''if that dahmed ice cream van hadnt come alongside he might nonetheless be alive immediately'' :) xxx

Answer 4

(Being totally serious...)

Hey, did you hear they filled in the snake pit at the zoo? Yeah, they filled it in! Now the snakes don't have a pit to hiss in!