my boyfriend and i have been together for 4 years and we have a 2 year old lil girl together. We got into an argument the other day and he left for a few days...come to find out i caught him with another girl.....they had sex one time he said. She won't quit calling him and i found out he has been answering her phone calls and texting her on his cell. Even down to it, going to meet up with her...he says he still loves me and wants to be with me. I put my foot down the other day and told him it's either get rid of me or her....he said he wants to be with me and his baby. So how do I trust him to not answer her phone calls cause you know she won't quit calling her. He called and told her there was no more him and her. How do I quit worrying all the time.....please help!!!
2007-02-20 02:28:17 · 10 answers · asked by aeropostale_chic_18 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You will always wonder if he's cheating.
2007-02-20 02:33:51 · answer #1 · answered by jacksfullhouse 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is really sad.Why do women hurt other women in this way? I guarantee one of his main appeals to her is the fact he has a woman and child already! I dont know why but I think women are terribly insecure so that when they engage in this type of behavior they get some sick satisfaction of beleiving they are better then some other woman because the man wants her over another.....The problem here though is your man.....Do you love him after all of this? Or are you holding on because he made you feel worthless bby cheating on you? Look deep insside yourself and ask yourself these questions. Frequently after a guy cheats on a woman she feels undesirable and not good enough anymore because HE made you feel this way NOt because you are! You said yourself you now have trust issues with him, so you really gotta ask yourself is this what is good for you and for your daughter? Do you want to go through this again in the future because odds are you are going to again if you stay with him. If you do stay with him then you have to truely forgive him but he has to truely be sorry and see the error of his ways and know how much it hurt you.....it doesnt sound like he does or has if he is texting this woman.....Do not think about him ONLy think about what is best for you and your baby and be logical in your thinking.....We women are too emotional so look at the facts....Good luck, I have been where you are now before with children involved as well.
2007-02-20 10:39:39 · answer #2 · answered by Jenny T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would probably continue to worry like you, but try not to do it so much. I am in no way saying to completely trust him, since he seems like he's untrustworthy and has lied before. One more chance wouldn't hurt. But if he begins to continue down the path of "I can have one girl, I can have another" type of a thing, it may be time to move on. I understand you two have a child together,but since the child is so young, if you two were to separate so to speak, it's best to do it early. That way, you avoid getting too terribly hurt and the child can have a better life while you find a better partner
2007-02-20 10:38:14 · answer #3 · answered by YinxSphinxmen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you know the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater".. dont get me wrong, people CAN change but they have to really want it and not change jus because they get caught.. and if you really think about it, do you really wanna be with someone who would throw away 4 years for sex one time????? and honestly to me it sounds like it was more than once cuz he obviously didnt take any time waiting. only 2 days seperated and already got someone texting and callin him ALL the time... guys dont like that type of thing unless they really like that person and hell some still dont like it.. my point is it dont look like he is tellin you the whole story.. read between the lines... and about the worrying... it will always be in the back of your mind.. time is the only thing that will make it better.. well not better.. easier to deal with
2007-02-20 10:57:09 · answer #4 · answered by tru_blondeness 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once a trust is broken in a relationship it is very hard to get the trust back. you will always think that he is. and once a cheater he will likely do it again. unfortunately he got caught. and will probably lay low for a while, but that does not mean he won't do it again. You have to think of your daughter needs. she needs to be the one that comes first. I myself can not tell you to leave him or stay with him, that has to be your decision. just follow what your heart is telling you. and remember you have a 2 year old daughter to take care of. and she really does not need that negativity in her life, that her dad is cheating. good luck. and I wish you and your daughter the best.
2007-02-20 10:43:23 · answer #5 · answered by misty blue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're worried that's good, it's common sense telling you he's a dog and can't be trusted. I know you have history with him and when children are involved it's never easy. But think about if a man didi this to your daughter one day when she's grown, would you want her to put up with this? And think of what kind of example you're setting for her. Plus you are in a relationship, do you want to marry him one day, where can things really go between the two of you if you if you can't trust him. You need to have more love and respect for yourself not to put up with being disrespected this way.
2007-02-20 10:36:12 · answer #6 · answered by beanie_babymama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Trust is something that is earned, not just given away. I would be forever weary about your boyfriend and this (and future girls) forever. They say Once a cheater, always a cheater, and I believe it. A leopard does not change its spots.
I'm sorry you have to go through this.
2007-02-20 10:39:21 · answer #7 · answered by kebbs32 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, get tested asap for a variety of STDs and HIV/AIDS - for your own peace of mind. The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour, so listen to these red flags. For your child's sake, maybe it's best to move out on your own, gain some independence, keep dating him if you want, but smarten up and do what's best for your little girl.
2007-02-20 10:36:54 · answer #8 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Sorry:S
2007-02-20 10:38:50 · answer #9 · answered by Lily 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this bee wants plenty of honey available so that he can flit betwwen flowers.......
2007-02-20 10:33:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋