there is this guy. im not really attracted to. but he is everything i want in a man. He told me couple of weeks that he likes me. but like i said im not really attracted to him. but he has been doing really sweet things. he maid me a cd the other day with all the songs that maid him think of me. he knows i love pink and he gave me a pink bear. i am starting to like him everyday. but right now im hard for me to open up bc of all the hurt that i went though. what do you think i should do
2007-02-20 01:29:29 · 21 answers · asked by ♥live life to the fullest♥ 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A relationship's just not going to work if there's no physical attraction...
And you're gonna be miserable, because you're going to blame yourself for not being able to get over it.
It's not your fault. There's a word for a person who's good to you, but you're not attracted to. "Friend"
The guy is a friend. If you try to make him more, you're going to end up hurting yourself and him, and losing the friendship.
Believe me, I've done this a couple of times.. because they were just such awesome people... but not attractive girls at all.
2007-02-20 01:56:23 · answer #1 · answered by Offended? Aww Have a Cookie! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go with the flow and see how things go. Be his friend first, if anything shall progress, then so be it! You dont have to be attracted at first...an attraction can actually grow as you get to know somebody better, as can love! So, see how things go... friends turning into love is usually a very good thing! Just be his friends for now, if it doesnt work out and someone else sweeps you off your feet then it just wasnt meant to be! Maybe hes trying to help you get over that hurt and show you all guys are different and there is few you can actually trust! But, he is helping a lil isnt he? Without someone showing they like you, it would prob hurt alot more right now....but having someone else there always helps to ease the pain! Good Luck...Hope this helped a lil...
p.s. who knows, maybe he'll just end up being your best guy friend....just go wherever life may take you, its all a big adventure! So enjoy every minute...its too short to worry about things and how they should be!
Good Luck! Hope this helped a bit....
2007-02-20 09:43:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's sad that one rotton apple in the bunch causes everybody to assume they are all bad! This guy seems to really care about you. Is it the physical attraction that you are talking about? Sometimes, when you don't find men that are the most attractive on the outside they are the ones that make you feel the greatest (mentally and physically). I know when you are hurt is hard to open up and you don't have to open your whole life up to a person. I don't. I learned a long time ago when you tell people everything about yourself that gives them the ammunition to throw it up in your face when you are mad at each other. Be somewhat of a mystery. Think of it this way, you are holding all the shots. Tell him that you will go out with him as friends for now and see how things go. Just be yourself and have fun and don't let that jerk loser that hurt you keep doing it by not giving yourself the happiness that you deserve.
2007-02-20 09:42:23 · answer #3 · answered by K-E-G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the seeds of attraction are there, maybe they're just not ready to grow yet.
I'd say you need to figure out why you're NOT attracted to him. Do you not find him physically attractive? Are you having a hard time opening up due to a previous relationship? Are you attracted to other guys and just not him?
Once you can answer these questions you'll be in a better position to gauge what you should do with this guy.
Be sure not to lead him on though. It's not fair to string him along, making him think that it will become more than just a friendship if you're not going to be attracted to him.
2007-02-20 09:43:38 · answer #4 · answered by wa-webguy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be shallow. Does a guy have to be attractive in order for you to fall for him, attractive guys are in limited supply. What would you rather have an attractive guy or a guy who knows how to make a women feel great.
I have a relative who is very deformed her husband is also very deformed. Both would be considered ugly, but they fell for each other. Love each deeply, have sex all the time, and have been happily married for 10 years.
2007-02-20 09:36:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
decide how superficial you are, is the appearance factor gonna be a big enough issue that ultimately you can't get past it?
If you try to and aren't sure you can from the get go, and find the inner beauty, you may go from trying to be decent to hurting a genuinely sweet guy. If you can get past it, also realise any guy will try harder if he has to win you over at first, how confident are you these efforts will continue after he has. If you are trying to get over something reguardless, I suggest waiting because how much are your decisions based on that rather than the person themself, and if you can't get over it, or hurt him over what was done to you, it won't give him a fair shot if he is worth it!
2007-02-20 09:41:16 · answer #6 · answered by HPVcpl4HER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but you sound very shallow in this posting. You love with your heart, not your eyes.
Hurt was born from happiness that has left, and can only be replaced by more happiness. If you feel strongly towards your convictions of him not being attractive, than no matter what he does to sweep you off your feet, it won't work.
2007-02-20 09:35:08 · answer #7 · answered by Tyerant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart, yes we all get hurt but we have to move on or when true love knocks we close, (slam) the door. Friends all to often make the best lovers. Go out to eat, see a movie, talk, walk on the beach, in the park wherever. Just be together and see where your heart takes you. Sounds like you want to like him, he has what your looking for. Be cautious, but be open. :)
2007-02-20 09:37:11 · answer #8 · answered by whateverhohum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you saying that you won't go out with him because another man dumped you?
Or are you saying that you won't go out with him because he's not good enough for you?
Women are always complaining because they date handsome men, and of course they just get used for convenient sex, etc... and they dump you as soon as you mention the word commitment.
And when a man is everything you want, you complain that he isn't rich/handsome enough.
You either give him as try, or tell him that you are never going to date him so that another woman who deserves him can get him.
2007-02-20 09:49:49 · answer #9 · answered by A dad & a teacher 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont waste your time over a man your not really attracted to,but if ever you think you can learn to love him in the end then why not give the guy a chance....but make sure you really know him because he might be doing things he knows you already like,,,try to find out how much he could love you
2007-02-20 09:36:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋