I can't seem to release my stress.....?

Question

I feel so much pain and tension inside. Awhile back walking,running,and other physical activities used to help calm me down. Now I can barely even cry. Its just building up inside of me.....
It makes me want to start practicing self mutilation again because it was the only thing that would make me feel ok. Unfortunately,if my Mom catches me again(I am fourteen) she'll freak out and tell my father.
I can barely get to sleep some nights. I can't cry myself to sleep,because for some odd reason I can not cry period.
Its driving me crazy. I can't just go to sleep anymore and "turn off",because I can't seem to fall asleep. My mind is all ways occupied with thoughts of death/suicide/violence.
Whats wrong with me?

Answer 1

My dear 14-year old, there's more to your life than just what you're feeling. Really. There are lots of other people who love you that you can love back, there are lots of other people who want to share good times with you, there are lots of other people who have problems of their own that you could perhaps reach out to, give your support to and help through their problems. Instead of occupying your mind with thoughts of death you could ask God to heal your wounds and give you the necessary strength and courage to live the life that you've chosen and thank God every day for allowing you to come to this place and meet the challenges it presents to make you a better person. But you can't think about thanking God, or your family, or your friends, or do anything beneficial in your life until you stop thinking about yourself, stop focusing on YOU. Get outside yourself... that's where life is, outside yourself where other people are.

There are breathing techniques to stop your racing heart: Take your pulse and breath in for 4 beats of your heart. Hold that breath for 8 beats of your heart. Then breathe out for 4 beats of your heart. Do this at least 4 times when you're anxious. It's guaranteed to slow your pulse to normal. There are meditations that put you to sleep. Lie on your back in your bed at night, start thinking about your toes and with your mind, relax them, don't move them, let them be still. Mentally move up to your feet, mentally relax them, let them be still, then your ankles, etc. Do this slowly so that each part you think about relaxes. Don't think about any other parts of your body until each part you've thought about is relaxed and still. When they are, continue moving up the rest of your body with your mind, to your calves, your knee caps, your upper leggs, your thighs, your pelvic area, your butt, your abdomen, your back, your stomach, your chest, your arms, your shoulders, your neck, your face, the top of your head. If you make sure each part you think about is relaxed and still before moving on to another part of your body you'll probably wake up the next morning refreshed and wondering what part you left off on. It's hard to complete the relaxation before falling into a peaceful sleep. One day when you master this tecnique of relaxation you'll be able to lie down and mentally start at your toes and zip up to the top of your head and be asleep.

Instead of feeling pain and tension, feel God's love for you. It's all around you and inside of you. He gave you the spark of life. You are part of Him and He is part of you. Feel the beauty of the body you chose to live in during this life time, it's strength, it's youthfulness, it's ability to do almost anything. Seek some counseling from your school nurse or other professional people. We live in a marvelous time of physical and mental health knowledge. You might not find the answers you're looking for from the first or second person you talk with, but eventually you will. There are lots of answers out there for your questions but you have to look for them. No one is born into this life with answers. We all have to look for them. Don't be afraid to seek and find the answers.

Although I don't know what you look like, or where you are, I'm surrounding you with the White Light of God's Holy Spirit. It will protect you and comfort you always. Feel it's warmth, its comfort and it's love. You're having a negative energy attack with your thoughts of death/suicide/violence. Tell those energies to stop attacking you and turn your thoughts toward positive energies. Love, Life, Trust, Friends, Knowledge, Caring, Thankfulness. I know it's hard to do because you don't get so much attention from people if you're not so weird. But believe me, if instead you focus on life/supporting life/love (all positive energies) your life will change for the better so that you can make a difference in this life for yourself and others and you'll be rid of pain and tension and sleeplessness. Self-absorption is an easy thing to do, it only involves one person. You didn't come here to think only of yourself. You came here to accomplish something, what is it? If you long for a beautiful life that you can enjoy and feel good in, then start right now to make that life happen. Only YOU can make it happen. It can't be done FOR you. Go to your Mom, tell her you love her. Go to your Dad, tell him how much you love him. Lay out your clothes for school tomorrow, relax your body before going to sleep, and wake up tomorrow with a new attitude. Remember that God loves you and that His love is better than anything else. Shine some of that love out from your eyes to others, let them see your light. Stop dragging that bushel around with you and hiding under it everywhere you go. Even though your generation of kids is tough, you all need love. Everyone does. Maybe you can be the one to give hope to some others who need it. For a 14-year old you are a wonderful speller and you express yourself very well. Since you're probably in high school why don't you look into some of the journalism courses offered which require these exact two skills?

Release your stress now. It's not doing you or anyone else any good because it's a waste of energy. Embrace your strengths and start to use them to do some good and you'll see some wondrous things happen in your life. Stay in the Light of God's Love, 14-year old, and don't forget to ask Him for all your answers.
Much love to you
From a stranger who cares about you

Answer 2

Sweetie, everyone no matter how happy they look have problems that trouble them. Some people deal with their problems better than others.

Try to figure out what is causing you this pain and tension. Can you solve it? Can someone help you solve it? If so, then talk to someone you trust and try to work out your problems. Try finding a guidance counselor at school, or maybe a friend's mother or a relative that you feel you can confide in.

If what is causing you all this stress is not something you can change, you need to try to understand that it is out of your hands. Worrying will not help you change something that is not your fault or that you cannot control or change. It will only make you feel worse.

If you cannot find a reason for you pain and tension, some chemicals in your brain may be imbalanced and this causes depression and unhappiness. There are a lot of medication available to help balance those chemicals out. You should speak with your doctor to see if this is right for you.

Another thing to pay attention to is your diet and excersize. You mentioned that physical activities helped you feel better. This is true because excersize releases endorphins which are chemicals that make you feel happy. Also, when our bodies lack some nutrient or vitamin, we start feeling lazy and depressed. Try taking supplements and eating healthier foods. Again you might want to ask you doctor about this.

Sweetie, please don't self-mutilate. You might feel like you are masking he pain inside by creating a new type of pain on the outside but in the long run you are just hurting yourself and your psyche even more! Whenever you feel upset, go run around the block or dance to your favorite songs. You can even try watching funny movies or TV shows to help you out of your gloominess. Call a friend or try to spend time with people that make you feel good.

Nothing is wrong with you. It is normal to feel depressed at times and sometimes these feelings get the best of us. My teenage years were the most difficult time in my life and I can relate to what you are saying, but please believe me when I tell you this: Life gets better. Life goes on. Things either solve themselves or stop mattering.

Hang in there, I know you are strong because it takes a lot of courage to admit that you have a problem. Just stay true to yourself and believe in your ability to overcome this.

Answer 3

I have found the miracle cure for you. Really works. Take 2 tbls. apple cider vinegar in a glass of water 2-3 x day or whenever you feel stressed. Has 93 vitamins and minerals. That is what our bodies are crying out for. This is why you cannot sleep at night and why you are stressed. I promise you, you will feel instant results. In about 2 weeks you will feel like a difrferent person. I am telling GOD's truth, as I have often wanted to kill my family and neighbors. Now I am happy and smiling everyday due to acv. Read the apple cider vinegar website for more info. It really will help with whatever ails you.

Answer 4

try chamomile tea before bed about half an hour. That should help a little on the relaxing. But yes you do need to talk with your parents and get some help. If you are 14 and going through this, something is wrong. Try some basic meditation. Lay flat, close your eyes, take in slow deep breaths. With every exhale try to imagine the air being let out of your body. Start with the toes. Deep breath, exhale, calves are deflating. Keep doing that until your entire body is in a self induced trance. Main thing is to force yourself not to acknowledge any sounds in the room. Do not acknowledge any thoughts. Just think air out. it really should help. I used to dothat the nights before taking a big test and after studying or in the middle of it if I needed to refocus. It should help.

Answer 5

Higher stress levels affect both the mental and physical health of a person. Deep breathing is a simple relaxation technique which can be used to effectively lower stress levels at any time.There are many deep breathing relaxation techniques which when followed will make you feel relaxed.More details and remedies at http://deeplyrelax.com

Answer 6

1) Hun...i don't know whats wrong wiht iinux but smoking had my grandfather intubated (life support) for a week while the hospital (Intensive care) figured out how to treat his softball sized cancer in his lung (from smoking). so don't smoke
2) maybe go see a shrink they CAN help (no shame in therapy)
3) maybe a creative release paint, draw, music, scream?

Answer 7

it sounds to me like you're reaching your share of teenage angst. we all go through it, but it's still a very real and very personal time. i myself self-mutilated when i was 16, and regret it now.
if you feel you can't talk to your parents about it, please seek out a good teenage support group online. you're obviously very unhappy, and angry, and it's time to talk about it with people who can sympathise and help.

for the insomnia, i suggest taking a few slow breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. do not force the air in or out, keep your breathing slow and rhythmic. it may also help to soothe your stress and nerves too.

i really hope you feel better soon!

Answer 8

I understand how you feel.Im 13 turning 14 soon..And Im going through counseling now.I loss my REAL dad.BUt i never knew he was my real dad.And counseling is helping me.Just see your school counselour they really can help you....

Answer 9

You need to talk to your parents and get some professional help.

Answer 10

smoking really helps to relieve stress.. its the next best thing after weed and alcohol...