How to teach my my 13 month old to fall asleep by herself?

Question

I want my 13 month old to fall asleep by herself and sleep through the night. We o through out night time routine and then i make sure I put her to bed awake. she hates it. sh also doesnt want to go near her room anymore because she thinks I'm gonna stick her in her bed and leave. I am so heartbroken over this and am willing to nurse her till she is 14 years old. lol. No but when we are in her room getting ready for bed all she does is try to escape. We tried the Ferber method but its been month and she still cries at least 30 min every night until she does pass out by herself. I have also gradually weaned her from her 2 night feedings. If she wakes up for them my husband goes in to calm her. But how can I make her feel more comfortable to go to sleep? feel safe in her room and ok with me leaving when we shut the lights??
has anyone been through this?

Answer 1

I did Ferber when my son was 6 months and it took about 3 weeks. Your daughter is much older and has gotten use to a certain way so you're going to have to be much more patient and consistent. The older they are, the harder and more resistant they are to change. You may try to not put her down totally awake, instead, try to get her drowsy then lay her down. Gradually do less and less over the week. Remember, that she really needs about 10-15 min of "wind down" time before you even start to get her in bed...she might just be so wired from the day and trying to figure out how to get out of the situation that she works herself up. Also, try letting her play in her bed during the day. Put some toys in and stay and play with her. Hang in there! Good luck!

Answer 2

This is harder than potty training. My daughter had problems until she was almost 2. It is NOT the fact that you are still breastfeeding, Kudos, by the way on that. The best thing to do is to stick to the routine everynight. Don't do it differently at all, and do your best to do it at the exact same time each night, as well. After the routine, put her in bed, tell her you love her, give her her favorite item, and leave. Stick to your guns. Don't get frazzled, and especially don't let her see you fretting, she will know she has you then. If the crying continues, check on her, as with the ferber method, but don't pick her up. Just pat her. I had to do it less than the ferber method, or we would have been in there all night. She never hushed either. We just had to lay her down, let her cry for 20 or 30 min., go in reasurre her with as few words as possible, then leave again. It took longer with her than most, because she was so used to getting her way in everything else. After a few weeks, she knew what was going to happen, and conceeded. SHe also tried to escape. She would even throw herself over the crib and bruised her face once. It is harder on the parents, than it actually is on the child. Also, one more thing that helped us was to cut her nap time down, and kept it before 2 in the afternoon. Just hang in there. She will adjust, and so will you.

Answer 3

first of all i respect the fact that you still breastfeed i breast fed my 1st till she was 2. your daughter feels safe when she is with you and babies communicate by touch my daughter is now 18 months old and she goes to sleep in her bed i sit there with her and talk to her let her know whats going on sometI'mes if she sees that there is activities going on she wont want to sleep she wants to be part of that action i put her back in bed and tell her its time to go to sleep sometimes she wakes up at 5 in the morning and comes to our bed that part im still working on try to cherish your children maybe the Ferber method is not the best method for your child do what you feel is best DON'T compare YOUR CHILD TO ANY ONES CHILD every single child is different you do what you think is best that has always work for me don't let anyone pressure into doing other wise

Answer 4

Wow, I'm sorry that you're going through this, but it will pass. It is very hard, but part of it is you needing to let go. Let her cry, even though it breaks your heart. Try a night light or one of those bears that make the womb sounds. If it doesn't work maybe you should switch to breast milk in a bottle. She will get through it. Although I do think the breastfeeding is great. Way to hang in there! Good luck.

Answer 5

I have a 12 month old baby. I give him his favorite toy or his favorite blanket then wines for a few minutes then he goes to sleep. If he wakes up during the night, I go in and give him a bottle or sippy cup. and he falls back to sleep on his own.

Answer 6

You should read the sleep lady book.She said to slow leave the room a few inch away ever couple of day until you can comfort her form the door.It may take to way to get her to sleep but it works.I use it for the twin I look after.

Answer 7

Put a night light in her room.

Answer 8

you should of done this a long time ago.

just tell her that if she is a big girl, she needs to learn to sleep alone.

Answer 9

you're still breastfeeding her? that's insane. 6-8 mths of breastfeeding is all you need. that's why she cries.