Do sealed records violate the rights of adopted children or protect the rights of those who give ^ their child

Question

Do sealed records violate the rights of adopted children or protect the rights of those who give up their children? Please give opinions/facts (and where you got them) on one or both sides. Should the adopted child be able to track down his/her birth mother/father? If not, why? Should these records be sealed so that an adopted child can not learn of his/her mother/father? Explain. Would you like to be protected from your child finding you when (s)he is older?

Answer 1

Well lets add up the issues and you decide.
Regarding being given away and records being sealed.
1 - Your childhood is spent in numerous foster homes, 7 different homes by the age of 6. 5 more by 18, then out on ones own, alone in this world, without any family.
2 - As a child you watch dozens of children be adopted from the same home your in, but never you. Often right after you become attached to your new brother or sister they are adopted and dissappear for good.
3 - Every school you attend, and theres quite a list, thinks your just a trouble maker because your a foster child.
4 - Kids tease you about being an orphan.
5 - You are a standout in every sport you play and set a few school records yet never have a family member watching you play.
6 - You cried yourself to sleep almost everynight of your childhood wanting your mother to just hold you.
7 - You grew up an indentured servant in most foster homes and had to do all the chores while their biological kids did nothing.
8 - You had to explain numerous times later in life why theres no mothers maiden name, no known race, and revisit bad memories.
9 - Finally when the one controlling access to the records dies the military releases the records. Finally at 47 years old I locate from her name and a few months work, my mother.

The rest from here, is a different story but while my first 9 answers are true and exactly how most of my childhood memories are to this day, dont despair. Many a criminal could take any 2 or 3 of them and use them for an excuse for being a bad person later in life. I beleive nothing from a childhood can make a person turn criminal other than maybe becomming a petty theif or becomming hooked on drugs. I praise the lord every day and have dedicated most of my life to helping people.
There is no situation one can ever endure where god cannot come in and restore you. Ask and he can make a difference, the enemy of god doesnt need asked. Because of him many women faced with my mothers situation of years ago would just opt for an abortion. My mother couldnt get one back then and so I was born unwanted. Now I see my mother and biological brothers, sisters, and my father. I really respect my dad and have helped him more in the last year and a half than my 5 brothers and sister have in the last 3 decades combined. I pray for my mother and the rest but think she has ruined them with her horrible example of how to live and be responsible. She has made them all beggars and leeches. So to answer your question I suppose there is no answer, just thousands of situations, each one has its own merits.

Answer 2

Well I wanted to find my birth mother to find out more about a medical history. As I got older and went to the doctor.. the questions is there any cancer in the family.. it would make me think. So when I turned 19 I went to the court house of the county I was born in and asked the Judge if I could open my birth decree? The 1st Judge said No.. went back again the very next day and asked another Judge and he allowed it! I also was lucky enough to find my biological mother the same day. It was pretty interesting and we got along at 1st and she even came down and met my parents and lived with us.. that is another story, but all and all it was nice to learn about the family history and medical history as well. As of today.. we only talk every now and then, she is a drug addict and alcoholic and I thank God that she did have the sense to place me up for adoption. Be aware that some of them do not want to be found and even went to the extreme of using a fictious name at birth. I know that my biological mother was not even 100% sure who my father was.. so that can be difficult to swallow as well. I wish you luck and hope that things will work out for the best.

Answer 3

Your daughter is feeling her oats. She is allowing a woman--who is her biological mother--to fill her head with lies about you. As long as you know the truth that is all that matters. I would suggest that you write her a letter or an email stating how much you love her and always will. She may not accept this fact right now but in a few more years when she has a chance to mature, she will. Have patience and your daughter will realize the truth about you. Soon enough, after the grandchildren come along, she will need you. Whatever you do, do not give up on her. Stay in contact by letter and email. Invite her and her husband to lunch. Try and stay apart of her life. She will get the picture how much you care.

Answer 4

Complete sealing of adoption records would render it impossible to prove that you are the guardian of the child. My adoption was private, closed and is sealed by the courts, but my parents (those that adopted me) retained a copy of all applicable information to prove that the adoption was legal and was finalized in the event that mommy dearest ever tried to contest the adoption. I have seen and have a copy as well of all applicable paperwork. I legally have had two birth certificates, one by the name my birth mother gave me with their names, then another by the name my adoptive parents gave me. The first one was destroyed and no copies can be attained, as required by law.

Do a little more homework. It's fairly easy for a child born in the united states and adopted in the united states to get information regarding their adoption. Most judges will give you a copy of your records, in the event of destruction or theft, with no hassle.

Answer 5

It is my understanding that if the parents (who give the child away) decide to have the original birth certificate available after the said child turns 18 then the child can see this...other than that...I think it protects both the parents and the child. Maybe at that time the parents weren't ready to be parents / maybe they thought they never would be ready...depends on the situation. But on another hand...if you really want to find someone, it's not that hard.!

Answer 6

Protect the rights of the parent giving up the child. They give their children up for a reason - they don't want anything to do with them. I for one would be horrified if I gave a child up for adoption only to have him or her "find" me (like I was lost or something) 18 years later to tell me how horrible I am for giving them up.

Answer 7

I think that every adopted child should be allowed to see the record of their birth parents.....just for the medical side of it...there are so many things that are hereditary and can be prevented if the history is know about.....I think they should not be open to anyone but the child and the parents.....