My friend mom is mentally abusing her by callin her names & blaming her 4 every little thing wha do i do?

Question

she's been doin this jus about all her life and i known my friend for about 3 years now and its constant and i cant take it anymore cause she keep callin me cryin. so who do i call or what do i do cause i tried talkin to her mom and she wasnt tryin to hear me and hung up.
she wanted to talk to my mother but i am a grown independent 21 year old college student and besides my mama dont like her anyway.

Answer 1

First of all, there is only one side of the story here ... and no information on what the Mother of your friend is having to deal with in regards to your friend's behaviors towards the mother in the Mother's home ... and that would be a key.

I AM SURE that the 'friend' is not as 'innocent' as you are making her out to be here ... and not treating her Mother with Respect, breaking some house rules, etc etc etc (everything that parents worry about .. for their children's safety).

YOU have no business talking to her mother ... that is not your place in life. Have you tried to be considerate and respectful to the mother? Is the daughter sneaking out, seeing a problem boyfriend, not concentrating on her schoolwork, not doing chores, disrespecting and calling the mother names, throwing or abusing the mother?

THAT is what we need to know from the mother's perspective to really address the problems in that household, and any therapist would work with just the mother and daughter .. and no one else.

The BEST thing for you to do at this time ... is to listen to your friend (limited), but ENCOURAGE her (and TELL her) to SHOW her mother RESPECT and DIGNITY and to TREAT her MOTHER as a HUMAN BEING ... one who is providing for that daughter, and for which (I am almost sure of this) disrespecting the mother in the mother's home.

Answer 2

If you are 21, I assume your friend is also over 18? So she can choose what she will do. She needs to decide whether the benefits of living with her mom outweigh the disadvantages. She should also consider that, as a grownup, she doesn't have to take her mom's criticism so personally. She needs to see that this is a problem of her mom's; that her mom isn't likely to change; and that her mom's behavior isn't really personal toward her. Her mom is just that way.
If she can manage this, maybe she won't have to move out. But if she simply can't get along with her mom, she might be better off to make her own way in the world.

Answer 3

just try to be there for your friend for support and guidance as much as possible. that is really all that you can do in this situation. that will help her out more than anything. hope this helps. good luck.