Trust in a New Relationship?

Question

Well,
I've known this girl for almost 3 months now. 2 weeks ago I asked her to be my girlfriend. She happly said yes.
Yesterday we went on a date. She communcated to me before that there was a problme. So, I made the dicision to skip the movie and talk. She gave this example 'its kinda like this. You know how some teachers start you off with an A and you have to keep it, or some give you an F and you have to earn it'. Well I've been giving you an A, but then thats stupid. then she said, 'i cant tell you the problem because it could jepordize my trust system.

Should I end it? I'm just heartbroken over it.
I know there's other women.

Answer 1

I don't care what anyone else tells you our entire life is a game, a test, and filled with judgments.

I have never been in a relationship with a lady that I did detect some emotional issue. The fact in the matter it is our own level of understanding about our self and the human condition that determine how well we handle any situation.

All women play games to a certain degree...that is that. Women test men all the time to weed out the idiots ASAP. The more feeling she has for you the more complex the tests. What is there to be heart broken about? This woman presented a challenge that you simply could not deal with. Looking at her trust system if she told what's on her mind it give you an unfair advantage over her. More importantly it spoils her grading system. She wants you to earn her trust before she gives herself to you completely. I have more respect for this woman. At least she knows her value system and maybe when to give it up.

The answer to your problem is in the word “communication”. The other clue to solving your problem with this lady is learning when to take control of a situation and be a man without being a bull in a china shop in the process. Your feeling of being heartbroken is an over reaction on your part which denote a possible lack of emotional maturity as well. Smart women can sense these things from a mile away but this lady sees potential in you. Don't blow it if you like this gal.

There are allot of emotionally mature women out there that are tired of teaching men how to be men. I used to burn women out over their little test until I started thinking like one. If I was a beautiful woman that was approached constantly by men wanting only one thing I too would develop some system to weed out the men from boys.

Answer 2

She sounds kinda kooky and if she's not going to communicate what the issue is, then it's going to affect your behavior and you aren't going to be able to be yourself 100%.

Relationships aren't tests. In school there was a correct answer and everything else was incorrect. In Life there is a lot of grey area and subjectivity. People should be treated as individuals and not as letter grades.

To end it or not is up to you, but she certainly hasn't made a good start. If she's keeping something from you now, what will she keep from you down the road? Telling you the issue may "jeapordize her trust system" but not telling you is jeapordizing y'alls communication system, not to mention affecting your trust and view of her.

Answer 3

(Assuming the mentioned problem is a problem in your relationship:)

Experience has taught me that if a girl lets you know there is a problem and doesn't tell you what it is, it's almost like being on mental probation. If you don't know what the problem is, how are you supposed to fix it? In other words, how are you supposed to keep an A if you don't know what you're doing that is making you fail?

Answer 4

Sometimes women or men can rush into relationships without good judgement. Maybe she's been hurt in the past and was falling too quick for you. Give her some time and see what happens.

Answer 5

LEAVE THAT CHICK ALONE!!!!!
She sounds like she is on some games. Placing your relationship on a grade scale??? WTF. Leave it alone