( ladies only please over the age of 30 ) the word handsome?

Question

When you tell a man that he is handsome what are you really trying to say ? Is this a way of telling him that your not interested in him? I hear this alot -------your are very handsome ,--but

I consider myself to be a very good person,I treat ladies with respect.I can carry on a conversation about anything ,but yet not make you fill like i am running over you and not want to hear what you have to say. Sometimes i think that most women are looking for a man to abuse them in one way are another. Thats just not me.So when i hear you say your very handsome but ---i first thing i think is that your looking for a rougher type person,That bad boy type .The answers ive gotten so far are good . Thanks

Answer 1

i'm thinking if you're hearing it alot, you must be, well, very handsome....lol. when i tell a man he's handsome, i mean just that and think you should take it as a compliment. if there is a "but" following the compliment, perhaps what they're saying is that although there is a physical attraction, the chemistry is missing. saying "you're handsome" doesn't mean "i'm not interested". on the other hand, saying "its not you, its me" does. : )

Answer 2

My grandpa always told me when someone speaks to me and uses the word but, everything before the word is fluff & meant to ease the pain or disappointment of everything after the word but.
So what do the ladies say after the "but"? i see it up there in your post - just hanging there on the end of the sentence - that's where the meaning really is.....
(if i just tell a man he's handsome, then he's handsome. Not cute, handsome. Meaning there's something more to this man, something that to me represents class, grace, sophistication, ya know But - (hahahah)

Answer 3

Don't take it as a bad thing. It's actually a nice complement.

I think if you get a But in there after.. ie: you're handsom but.... it means she really likes the way you look but the two of you don't really mesh well on a personal level. Maybe she doesn't think you have much in common or share interests.

If there is a But in the sentence, she wants you to know she thinks your cute, so don't think that's why she's saying what she's saying.

Answer 4

What? I would think that was a compliment. Depends on the situation. If we were coworkers and you said, I can't seem to find anyone that is attracted to me, I might say, I find that hard to believe because you are handsome. But then you think I'm flirting with you, then you lost the meaning of my comment. Who is telling you that you are handsome? Your co-workers, your mother, your grandmother, your sister? Or some single chicks at the club?

Answer 5

I am 33, I don't think handsome is a bad thing, I would not use that word personally. I guess it depends on the person defination of the word. I think of handsome as nice looking, not a bad thing but that is just me.

Answer 6

If you are hearing the words "you are very handsome, but----", then I believe they are trying to be honest about being handsome and there's something else that is unattrative about you. I would pay more attention to what is being said after the word "but" and work on that. If I have misunderstood your posting, my apologies.

Answer 7

It means you look good on the outside, but theres something lacking on the inside. Are you conceited or boring? Too talkative or too quiet? If you want to be interesting to women, you have to give a bit of yourself, and then follow the same method women have used through the ages... ask her about herself and listen to what she says. People of both sexes respond to someone who is interested in what they have to say.
OK I have read your addition and so I will add this myself. The next time you get a brush off like this speak openly and honestly to the woman and say " I have heard this many times and I would like to know exactly what it means as I am confused, I think I have good interpersonal skills, but something must be lacking for this to have occurred so many times, it may be too late for us, but please, tell me what I can do to improve my chances next time".
As to that bad boy idea...what kind of girls are you going for that they would enjoy twisting up their lives with unpleasant people?
Its true women with a poor self image like the bad boy types, but is that the type of woman you want? When you look for a good woman, you find one, when you want an easy one you find that too.

Answer 8

When I say it, it just means he's handsome. No hidden meaning.

Answer 9

Handsome is a high compliment. It means you are "manly" attractive. : )