My MIL has done things over a period of 6yrs to offend me...to know this woman you would think she is the sweetest most hummble human being, but she stays on the phone 24/7 catching up on the latest gossip and also tells all of the other family members business...if you want to know the latest gossip, just drop by her house..he says he has spoken to her about things she done or said to offend me, but I've gotten no apologies etc..what should I do?
2007-02-19 02:24:22 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
OMG! Your MIL could be mine! I am going thru the EXACT same thing...Honestly, my husband and I have been in so many fights about it, and I was always mad at him thinking he's never said anything to her...but as it turned out, he was talking to her, but she's such an immature childish person, that she feels she's said and done nothing wrong so she's not going to apologize...just cause you haven't received an apologize from her doesn't mean he hasn't stood up for you, just means that you MIL doesn't care, as harsh as that sounds...
2007-02-19 02:32:39 · answer #1 · answered by Hayden's Mommy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If like you said he has talked to her and she still hasn't changed or apologized then it may be a case of she just doesn't care and it sounds like you'll just have to deal with her. You should be greatful that your husband has said things to her about it because a lot of men won't stand up to their mommies. I have a soon to be mother in law who is the same way and given things she has said and done we chose not to include her in our wedding. As a result she has alienated most of her side of the family and they have told us they will also not be attending.
At some point as harsh as it sounds you have to know when to cut your loses and just move on and learn to ignore the person causing the problem and if your husband can't respect that then to bad for him. It took me about a year to get my soon to be husband to realize that he isn't responsible for what his mom does and says but it was his job to make her aware of the problems she was causeing.
ALL I CAN REALLY TELL YOU BEYOND THAT IS GOOD LUCK AND I HOPE IT WORKS OUT FOR YOU.
2007-02-19 02:39:45 · answer #2 · answered by hotmamainmi1982 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to put your husband straight now and find out why he isn't standing up for you as your husband to his mother!!!!!! This is going to take it's toll on your relationship with him. How much insult can one women take before she snaps, at the women dishing it out. Sounds like she needs a good speaking to. I have me one of those and TRUST ME I PUT AN END TO IT. It did take a very large blow out as I also kept it in for approx 6years and when I snapped, I snapped. Let her know that if she wanted to be in MY LIFE THEN SHE WOULD ACT APPORPRIATELY IN MY HOUSE ON MY TERMS. Don't let someone else dictate to you how, when, or why you run your life the way you do. She has her own life to run her way!! Dam I hate these type of people
GOOD LUCK TO YA
I will tell you things with my MIL have been alot better since the cards were put on the table!
2007-02-19 04:16:19 · answer #3 · answered by momma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It Means He's a Man! Most real men won't get involved in the women's talk. You need to lighten up. Watch some Everyone Loves Raymond reruns! Unless she is really cruel or has done something outrageously offensive, laugh it off and call her "Marie"
2007-02-19 02:45:46 · answer #4 · answered by Grandma Shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can’t say without knowing what she did/said to offend you. Frankly, I’ve known people who have gotten offended over some very minor, insignificant, and downright stupid things. I’m not saying that’s the case in your situation, but, again without knowing what she did/said…
2007-02-19 02:38:49 · answer #5 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please he's a goddamn mama's boy. she figures she's the only person for him, and he's pussy enough to let her act that way, it ain't gonna change- but on the other hand -dealing with a liar, a cheat, and an abusive bastard could be worse. you demand to have a talk with them both and deny marriage rights till he does. you the woman of the house and if he can't respect it, and she can't, then get gone. A house begins with a woman--modified Mexican proverb
2007-02-19 02:39:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there done that.
It got worse in my case.However,he did warn me in beginning not to share with her. But stupid me,being a non judgmental person I shared personal things and got bit.
So,try not to personal things,talk only when you have to,be cordially.
After all mom&dad were there before you and will be there after you.
Good Luck,
Butterfly
2007-02-19 03:03:24 · answer #7 · answered by Butterfly274 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it means he's afraid of his mother. lol
Ok....getting serious now....maybe he loves his mother a lot and does not want to go "against her", so to speak. Maybe he thinks it would hurt her.
One thing he needs to understand though is that now, being married to you, he is bound to you. Not to his mother. When you get married you are tied to your spouse. I mean, you leave your parents to be united (as one) to your spouse. He has to understand that one time he was family with his parents and siblings, but now YOU are his family. His parents should almost be like friends now. His soul is tied to you and not his parents. He has to understand that YOU are his family now.
His dedication should be to you and not to his mother. He should stand up for you because you are his family now.
By not defending you, it seems like he never even left his parents to be united to his wife. It's like he's still united to them and not you.
I hope I'm making sense. And I hope he realizes that he needs to stand up for you. His loyalty and dedication should be to you and not his mother. The time for that has passed the day he married you.
2007-02-19 02:34:52 · answer #8 · answered by S.K. 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
two things he's either a ma-ma's boy and/or he is scared of her. things will not get better if he doesn't put a stop to this. it's his responsibility to tell his mother IN FRONT OF YOU, THAT SHE IS TO RESPECT YOU AND IF SHE DOESN'T THEN SHE SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED IN THE HOME. if she doesn't agree too bad. if he doesn't agree to do this then honey you are headed for a lot more offensive behavior from her and it will get to you.
2007-02-19 02:43:54 · answer #9 · answered by rencar32002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband's responsibility is to watch out for and support his wife and family. You should come first, not momma. If he won't then he's not much of a man, in my opinion. He's still "momma's little boy."
2007-02-19 02:30:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋