My boyfriend and i were together for more than 5 years. We recently broke up, a couple of weeks ago. Today, marks the first week that we have not had any contact with each other. We broke up because he got jealous of my other guy friends. However, despite having broken up, we would still talk and meet up. He gives me confusing answers. He said that he is already with someone. Yet, he still wants us to meet up from time to time. Then, he asked for time to sort out his situation. Sigh, what is there to sort out if he is already with someone right? I asked him if he was already happy, he did not reply. I asked him if he is already in love with her and if he did not love me anymore. No reply also. Then, on our last meeting, when i told him we could no longer see each other, I saw a tear fall down his cheek. So what gives?
2007-02-19 01:58:05 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
actually, donna, i have already addressed that issue, i changed my number and erased the names and numbers of the guys he felt jealous about. just a couple of days ago, my dad was rushed to the hospital, he found out somehow and relayed a message that he wanted to visit, his pride prevented him from asking me directly.
and yes, he told me that this new girl does not know that we still met up. thats why when i found out about this new relationship, i told him we could no longer meet up. hence the tears.
2007-02-19 02:27:54 · update #1
Ok, you've been together for more than 5 yrs and after all that time he gets jealous over your guy friends???
5 years is a lot of time to just one day break up because of something so small. I mean he's had a lot of time to change his mind. He's had more than 5 YEARS to know you. To know that you love him. Otherwise, the relationship would not have gotten as far to planning a wedding.
I mean, he should have known by now that you love him and that you don't have some "inappropriate" feelings for your guy friends. I mean, you were with him for more than 5 yrs. Doesn't that mean something to him???
I would say move on. Let go. If he can go and just quit something that's been going on for more than 5 yrs.....well, I would move on. It seems like he doesn't even know what he wants now. I hope he did not just create an opportunity to be free (being jealous....even when he's known you for 5 yrs). And that now he's regretting the decision. I'd move on, girl.
And why is he needing time to sort it out? Wouldn't it be an easy decision to come back if he really loves you and wants to spend his life with you? In my opinion, he wouldn't have even broken up the relationship in the first place if he really wanted to spend his life with you.
And how would he be if he got married to you? You say he's with someone and he also meets with you. So, he's now cheating on her. Would you want to be with someone who cheats even now when he's not married? What would it be like in the marriage?!
It's not easy moving on. I know that. It hurts like crazy. I've been there (heartbreak, I mean). But, I think you have to move on.
What helped me to not feel sad all the time when I was going through heartbreak was to keep myself occupied. Go out with friends. Life goes on. Very painfully for a while, but it goes on.
2007-02-19 02:23:31 · answer #1 · answered by S.K. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop thinking about it. Move on. If he is a jealous person, he's not worth being with. Jealousy=insecurity. U shouldn't be insecure in a relationship with someone else. It's not fair to them. People use jealousy to control u and to keep u away from other girls/guys so that u won't be able to compare what they are doing to what the other girls/guys could do. It allows them to blind u to what u could have so that u won't realize that they aren't giving u the best experience. If they were doing all that they could they wouldn't be insecure. Just move on and find a guy who is confident and doesn't worry about those things. As long as u are not flirting or leading your guy friends on he shouldn't have anything to trip about.
2007-02-19 02:05:25 · answer #2 · answered by Vince R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wants to have his cake and eat it too. My last relationship was 2 1/2 years, and reading "It's Called a Break-Up Because it's Broken" by Greg Beherendt (same author as "He's Just Not That Into You") really helped me.
The night I broke up with my ex I told him that I didn't feel like he loved me, wanted me, or needed me and there was no reply. Guys don't want to hurt us, so they say nothing. But, that basically means the worst.
2007-02-19 02:05:18 · answer #3 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he knows he made a stupid choice to break up with you over some guy friends... he has girl friends right?!?!
me and my boyfriend of 2 years broke up because of the same thing... jealous of my guy friends!!!
its just not fair... and he seems like he is really upset... but i mean you need to feel better and get over him, because he will keep being jealous no matter what!!
2007-02-19 02:03:12 · answer #4 · answered by Saritah Bonita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there its not easy getting over sum one u have been with 4 a long time honestly i dont think u really ever do hes probably seing this girl to get his mind of u and even try to make u jealous but to continue to c him isnt fair to anyone hang in there it will get better just me
2007-02-19 02:42:27 · answer #5 · answered by natasha k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
clearly there isn't enough communication between you guys, he is playing with your head by not answering specific questions. he isn't being fair to you and if he is with another girl does she know your'e meeting each other? I bet she doesn't. If you want to be with him you should tell him exactly how you feel, if you being with other men upsets him then maybe you shouldn't do it and make sacrifices for him. If you love him tell him thats what your'e prepared to do. good luck for the future.
2007-02-19 02:09:07 · answer #6 · answered by donna e 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time for both of you to move on.
did you act in a manner to make him jealous of your other guy friends ?
It sounds to me that your relationship is over.
Move on dont try and flog a dead horse
2007-02-19 02:04:42 · answer #7 · answered by deardaveuk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋