I have two friends M and Q. M is a closer friend to me than Q...however the two don't get along well....anyways, Q had made a remark about M, and I defended M...Q apologized and asked that I not mention anything.
I got into a discussion with M and I stupidly said someone had talked **** about her and I stood up for her. Which was a big mistake because then she asked who it was, then I realized I couldn't say anything. Now M is really upset that someone said something, she's really hurt that someone said something about her...I really shouldn't have said anything...I tried talking to her about it and saying it wasn't a big deal that ppl are stupid, but she said I was just making it worse....
I feel so bad that I said it, and hurt her feelings...is there anythign I can do?
2007-02-18 22:32:37 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would just appologize and let her know that you are not going to be put in the middle and that you let the other person know that to. You did not let them keep saying bad things about her just like you would not let her say bad things about other people. It is hard to be a good friend like that but she will gradually learn that you are right and respect you more for this.
2007-02-18 22:43:56 · answer #1 · answered by cricket111111 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were in your shoes, I write M a letter to say I'm really sorry for hurting her feelings, that I don't want to lose our friendship but will just be here when she needs me. Then, I'd leave her alonejust so I could let her put off some steam and call her in 2 or 3 days or maybe a week. That way we would be both willing to discuss things more objectively and intelligibly and can avoid the potential nasty exchange of words that could happen if I insist in talking about it while it's hot.
2007-02-18 22:47:06 · answer #2 · answered by Jane C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you shouldn't have said anything about someone badmouthing her and the only reason you said anything to her was so you could get the ego boost of her thanking you for defending her. Think before you say something! Especially since M is a girl, she is more sensitive to how people percieve her. Besides, what was the purpose for you saying what you did?
2007-02-19 01:02:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YEP, start by getting on your knees and begging for forgiveness. Explain to M that this person spoke to you in strict confidence of you NOT saying one word. You know that YOU screwed this up by even mentioning it remotely to her, BUT you will not reveal where or who said this. Then tell her the only reason you even said anything is so that she would know what had been said just in case she wanted to address what was said. Meaning if they had said her hair sucked the way she keeps it then she could if she wanted try to change it. I use this only as an example. Don't know if this will work, But Good Luck.
2007-02-18 22:48:55 · answer #4 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apologize!
2007-02-19 01:08:29 · answer #5 · answered by njyecats 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her to forget about it.that u do not share the other person's opinion about her.that u love her,respect her and value her friendship.tell her to let go and forgive.resentments get u nowwhere!
tell her is she cherishes ur relationship to just go on....if she can't ...stop seeing her for a while!
i bet ur friendship is worth more than a gossip and if it is not well then,,, bye bye!
good luck.
i've been there and it is sad not to be able to spend time together with 2 of ur fav people AT THE SAME TIME
2007-02-19 00:19:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask apology and tell the truth tell her that both of them are your friends and if possible the 3 of you will be friends
2007-02-19 00:03:15 · answer #7 · answered by Jesus M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop gossiping, and stop listening to it. nothing positive can come from either end. but to solve your situation. tell her what she asked to know you shouldn't have open the door. ask you friend m to keep the info in confidence, if she doesn't and q gets mad at you for telling you deserve it because you did tell and they already don't like each other you can control that.
2007-02-19 00:22:30 · answer #8 · answered by nealnefertirri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
simply, go to her and say sorry, if you are really friends she will forgive you. do it now don't spend more time of just feeling to be sorry. everyone makes mistakes but the clever one who realize his mistake and fix it quickly
2007-02-18 22:45:33 · answer #9 · answered by logyne26 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nothing....its not really your problem if shes too sensitive as to feel bad about every little bad thing someone says about her.....u did your part which was defending her...as far as i kno ur not at fault...wats been done's been done...
2007-02-18 22:43:20 · answer #10 · answered by unpredictedmystery 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋