last night I went on a date with a guy I met online, we have been in touch online and on the phone for about 2 months. He lives far from me so we agreed that he would stay at my place on the sofa as we were going for a couple of drinks, however we got a bit drunk and he ended up sleeping in my bed but we didn't have sex, he tried as any guy would I suppose, but I didn't let it happen. We got on really well and I felt that by having sex he'd lose interest and respect for me. I do regret having allowed him in my bed but was drunk and because I haven't seen anyone for a while it was nice to have someone to cuddle in bed but has he now got a bad impression of me?
2007-02-18 20:57:33 · 17 answers · asked by Liz S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
In the morning he left at about 11 but before that he went to buy me some cigarettes by my request as I had ran out and he suggested we meet on tuesday, hell come down to see me.
2007-02-18 21:05:35 · update #1
Well, he certainly won't think you are an easy lay but he might think - as I do - that you have control issues. I think you were testing him and somewhere deep down you may even have wanted the responsibility taken away from you by putting him in a situation in which he would find it difficult not to try to get intimate with you.
There is a little emotional dishonesty going on here. When you see him on Tuesday, I think you really need to deal with this as he could be left wondering what you expect of him and this can lead to a huge strain so early on in the relationship. If you don't want to have sex with him, avoid putting him (and yourself) in that situation.
If you genuinely think that by having sex with him, he wil lose interest and respect for you, then is this relationship worth pursuing at all? I think you need to do some thinking before Tuesday!
2007-02-18 21:43:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what's the big deal? no sex? dont think u have an image problem,with him. might b u wanted it 2 happen and he was 2 respectful! I a lady say's no! that what it mean's no! and we have 2 respect that , and happy 2 just cuddle.But dont say no and u really mean"i want 2 see how much ram u got in ur pc" lol.he respects u , and he had enough self control not 2 just get up and go home. I had a lady come 2 my house get naked (granted i had intermate relationship with her 4 7 year's) and asked me not 2 touch her......well after a while i asked her 2 leave(felt she was trying 2 control me), but i dint have sex with her and she know i really care 4 her.So is ur question really bout y he didnt try harder? cause no mean's no and he respect's u!
2007-02-18 21:24:38 · answer #2 · answered by sitting_in_th3_cut 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would he have a bad impression of you ? you did the right thing, if you are looking for a serious relationship rather than a fling. good on you for backing him off!
of course meet him again and maybe this time talk about it - and be honest - say you really like him but you dont really want to go 'there' yet, as you need more time to know him and dont want to jump to sex yet. i hope he understands you and respects your choice, and that you two continue seeing each other....
good luck girl :)
2007-02-18 21:47:05 · answer #3 · answered by GorGeous_Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has a bad impression of you then he must have been blind! You did nothing which would allow him to have one! In fact he probably respects you more because you have shown him you want a decent relationship. Guys prefer it i think if they get to know the girl then make that move! Just makes it better for them to wait it out!
2007-02-18 22:30:20 · answer #4 · answered by Kaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are worrying too much. he likes you that is obvious. He has made plans to see you again. That is your most important sign. Not having sex was the right choice if you did not feel comfortable with it for whatever reason! If he is worth anything he will see that and respect it and respect you for it!
Good luck
2007-02-18 21:27:19 · answer #5 · answered by twilite44 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No sounds ok to me. Also shows that you have more respect for yourself, personally I would have been impressed and want to carry on seeing you more. It also means that the whol thing doesnt end up being based upon sex.
2007-02-18 21:07:18 · answer #6 · answered by djp6314 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's still interested then you've done the right thing. There is too much pressure to have sex these days but by not doing it, you have told him (in a way) that you are no pushover!
2007-02-18 21:06:57 · answer #7 · answered by Chris B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats not a bad impression to leave , in my opinion its a good one , well done to you .. if he likes you he`ll wait and if you feel he has changed after this no sex night then good riddance to bad rubbish .... but i also have to say you did put yourself in a dangerous position there be careful xx
2007-02-18 21:05:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is impressed that you did not comply for sex, but he also knows it takes you one drink to get into your bed and the next time he may feel he can get lucky.
My advice is to play it cool for the next 5 times, and then he may have the impression that you are a very tough woman well in control of yourself
2007-02-18 21:02:35 · answer #9 · answered by MafiaGal 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I don't think he'll have a bad impression of you. You stopped him from having sex with you, so he knows that you are not easy. Good luck!
2007-02-18 21:01:20 · answer #10 · answered by So_many_questions 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋