wedding dilemma!?

Question

So what would you do about this?? Me and my dad were VERY close when i was younger. But once he got remarried and had my baby brother, his new wife convinced him to get a DNA test and he stopped talking to me for 5 years over a mis-hap(sp) at a christmas party. Im now getting married in august and over the last couple years have went and seen them maybe 3 or 4 times. But they never make an attempt to see me or call me. Im so tired of being the one trying. And my dad met my fiance and likes him and all,...but i dont know if i should have my dad walk me down the aisle or not. I have no brothers or uncles i am close to that could walk me, or grandfathers. Im so confused on this situation.

i tried to explain to him, i want him to be there and i want him as a part of my life. Now and after i am married. and still,..no calls, no visits.

NO i am his kid. You can tell WITHOUT the DNA test. trust me. But it came back that i am his.

Answer 1

Have your mom walk you down the aisle or even walk alone? In truth, it sounds like your Dad "gave you away" a long time ago, no need for him to do it again. Your mom would be an excellent choice, since she is the one who raised you and in truth is giving you to your new life as husband and wife.

Its time to cut dear old Dad out of the picture. Let him come to you and if you don't hear from him by the time invitations go out, then I say leave him be. Sometimes, even though they are your parents, and you love them, they may be more destructive in your life than its worth. Stop worrying about your Dad and his new overbearing wife, let them be. It is he who will have to live with his regrets and decisions. You've tried.

Your wedding day is supposed to be happy, and it sounds like your Dad's involvement (or lack thereof) will just make you more miserable.

Mom has stood by you through thick and thin, so let her be the one to walk by your side down the aisle.

Answer 2

What was the result of the DNA test? Are you not his kid? In that case, forget about him... I know he's all you know for a father, but for some people the only thing that matters is blood, and if he found out that you're not his blood (which is how this seems) then no amount of pleading will bring you him back.

Move on. Have your fiancee's dad walk you down the aisle, I'm sure he'd be honored to be there for you... and that's what really matters.

Answer 3

I would ask him. If he chooses not to walk you down the aisle then walk by yourself. This is a day that is about your love for husband to be and you. Sometimes when people remarry they are torn by their previous life and commitments. His current wife sounds like a jealous sort. I hope in the end you find some peace about this. It is so hard to go through life with unresolved feelings about a parent. I have been there and I do know that it will work out in the end. Good luck and best wishes for the future!

Answer 4

I'm sorry your father is treating you this way. It sounds like he allowed his new wife to put a separation between the two of you. Continue to make an effort to touch base w/ him from time to time, but don't stress yourself out. If he doesn't come around he is the one missing out. Tell him straight up I feel like you make no effort to improve our relationship. I would like to be closer to you, but you won't attempt to see me or call me. If he does not respond the way you need him too, just stay in touch from time to time and cut your strings. A real father is always there for his daughter!! You deserve that!! And as far as walking you down the aisle, if he responds to you appropriately you may consider letting him give you away. It could be the beginning of a new relationship w/ him. If he is a coward and won't step up then you can have anyone give you away. It doesn't even have to be a family member. Do you have a close friend or your fiance father or member of his family?? What about your mom. It doesn't have to be a man and it doesn't have to be only one person. Please remember this is your wedding and you can do whatever you want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good Luck!!

Answer 5

There is too much stress and presure to do what everyone else things is right and what everyone in the past has done for weddings and it is soooo easy to get caught up in all that and lose what is most important - you and your man! You need to think about who (apart from your man) is the most special / important person to you in your life - who is it that would actually care to walk you down the isle and share in your joy. If you dad is only there cause you want him there but he could not care less, then I do not think that is the right choice. What about your mum?? Traditionally it is the dad giving his daughter away, but if he has already given you away then it is missing that specialness. Pick the guy / girl that you want to share this with and who you know will share this with you. The most important day and new start to your life, do what makes you happy!!

Answer 6

Your dad is just listening to his wife as he has to live with her and he loves her.
Its not working for you at all like this and if he hasn't spoken to you for 5 years then "whats really going on?"
Keep trying with your dad and tell him the impact this has on you.
Mum's are great walking their daughters down the aisle. My mum did an awesome job. You could try your other parent.
All the best.

Answer 7

i wouldn't bother with him. if he is too much of an *** to realise how his behaviour is upsetting you he isn't worth the effort. just because he is your dad it doesn't give him the right to be like that, new family or not....
do you not have a really close friend (male), or maybe your fiances male relations would like to do the job.
i was always close to my dad, but like yours he got remarried, he doesn't have kids or anything, but we don't see him that often, i was talking to him the other day and he turned around and said to me, he isn't making any plans yet, he could be dead by then, now that is support.....
i wasn't planning on having him walking me down the aisle anyway but that ain't going to happen now anyway. I am going solo, i will have my flower girls go first and then my maid of honor and then me.
i get along fine with his new wife but my fiance hates her with a passion so she isn't invited to the wedding, and he understands why....
at the end of the day it is your wedding and if he is too much of an inconsiderate jerk to think of you first,don't bother with him....
it will only cause tension on your big day.
i wish you all the best, and have a wonderful day...

Answer 8

If I was you, I would walk down the aisle by myself. You have taken care of yourself for the past 5 years, you dont need a man to escort you. If I did this, I would also have the bridesmaids walk down the aisle by themselves and have the groomsmen already standing at the alter with the groom.

Answer 9

If you really don't think your dad deserves the honor of walking you down the aisle (because, honestly, it is the biggest honor for anyone to do) ... then don't let him do it. If you think your mom is a more appropriate person for the job, I'm sure she would be thrilled!! Don't think that is has to be a male who walks you down the aisle ... also don't think that anyone has to do it. This is your day and if you want to be the center of attention, then walk down by yourself. A lot of brides are choosing to walk down alone either because their father is no longer present, or they don't want to favor their father over their mother. It is all up to you!!!

Answer 10

find out d result of d DNA test. even if he is not ur dad u can still ve him walk u down d aisle. after d wedding leave him alone and face ur own family.