My 28 months daughter is really showing signs of terrible twos now. She has a fixed way of doing things and getting things done. Like for example she wants to wear gloves first then socks followed by shoes and then the jacket and if we try to alter anything she throws a big tantrum. Similarly she throws a big tantrum when we stop her from doing other naughty stuff. This happens every day without fail and my stay at home wife gets exhausted by the end of day. If we try to do anything out of the ordinary or her way she throws a big tantrum, she will cry and scream, recently she has also starting throwing things around and also tries to hit us as well. . She is overall a very fun loving and happy kid but nothing seems to working for her. We have tried talking to her and punishing her as well by giving her time out (1-2 minutes) in the bath room but she does it again and again.
2007-02-18 16:30:53 · 16 answers · asked by IL First 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
It's the terrible twos. LOL>>LOL..I'm mom to 3 and recognize them well. She has her own way of doing things and as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, I'd just let her. Makes no difference as long as she gets everything on she needs right?? The hitting and throwing things, tell her if she can't be a good girl she won't get to play with the toys. The hitting, just hold her hands lightly and tell her you don't like it when she behaves like this. She will understand, but it's a phase and she'll get through it. I promise.
2007-02-18 17:53:47 · answer #1 · answered by Melanie A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a big fan of bribery for the short term. if she falls into a habit of tantrums, you can offer her gum, or a penny for every 15 minutes or 30 minutes she does not have a tantrum. Since she is so young, she will only be able to hold off for a little while, it is just the nature of the beast, but it may reduce the frequency of the tantrums. When she has her melt down, just tell her you know she is angry and upset and needs some time to vent, and that she should let you know when she is calm and would like a drink of water and then just walk away. As long as you are at home this works pretty well.
The biggest difficulty is that she really is unable to control her frustrations, you want her to just save it up for a one or 2 a day tantrum rather than every 10 or 15 minutes.
2007-02-18 17:17:32 · answer #2 · answered by mliz55 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to learn to pick your battles. Putting her clothes on a certain way doesn't hurt anyone, so let her. She is at an age where she wants to do things herself. If she misbehaves and you try to discipline her and she starts to throw a tantrum, let her. It won't hurt her to scream her lungs out, she will eventually get tired of it. If you react to it that will only reinforce the behavior. Next time she throws a fit, make sure she is in a safe place like her room, close the door and walk away. Kids are smart even at her age, and they will continue to use behavior that allows them to get their way. Be consistent and let her know who is the parent, once she sees that throwing a tantrum will no longer get a rise out of you, she will stop. Good luck!!!!
2007-02-19 02:18:29 · answer #3 · answered by latingirl0527 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number one...she is only 28 months old...not 28 years. She doesn't have the mind of an adult...her attention span is about - that long so yeppers she's going to be naughty again and again and again and again and again and you'll have to tell her over and over and over and over and over and over. That is the nature of a toddler. Giving in to the trantrums only keeps them going. Once she knows she can push your buttons she will continue to do so. I suggest getting a child gate and installing in her bedroom doorway. When she starts a tantrum put her in her bedroom until she calms down. After awhile, (nope not going to happen over night), the tantrums will be come fewer, soon as she starts figuring out that they're not working any longer.
My daughter was the queen of drama during the terrible twos. First she tried banging her head on any solid service. When that didn't get attention she went to throwing her self so hard to the ground that she would literally bounce. That didn't get a rise out of me so she tried biting herself until she bruised...almost broke the skin a couple of times. All it got was an ice pack for the bruises once she calmed down. Next was my favorite...She would hold her breath and the last time she did so she almost passed out. After that things began to calm down. She realized that I would pay MORE attention to her when she behaved than when she didn't behave and she got what she wanted when she behaved.
2007-02-18 18:27:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's two! Let her wear gloves first, socks second then shoes then jacket. What's the big deal with that? that's how she likes it. Life's too short to fuss about that anyway.
kids have tantrums because they can't communicate like adults can. kids can't orate the way we can. they also have bad days just like we do and they take their anger out in their way, as we do, but we know how to control it - they haven't grasped that yet.
imagine being in a foreign city and you have no means of communicating with people because they don't understand you ... now imagine you're a baby as well! Pretty tough, huh?
time out in the bathroom is dangerous - I would suggest another area, like a chair or a mat on the floor where you can see her.
and remember - you're the boss. stand your ground. it won't happen over night but she will eventually understand and start behaving better.
2007-02-18 17:48:17 · answer #5 · answered by HCC 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
DO NOT bribe your child. She is a human being and she needs direction, not a treat. She especially does NOT deserve a treat if she is throwing things at her parents. Each parent has to has to decide whether or not to spank based on their own moral ethics. Regardless, this child needs to know that she is hurting you by throwing things at you.
As for the OCD behavior, it is in no way "naughty". It is a real disorder, and you need a professional to help her before the problem is irreversible. Good luck.
2007-02-18 19:40:57 · answer #6 · answered by lala 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When she disagrees with what you want her to do, try giving her choices.
For example - "Honey, do you want to put your shoes on now. Or do you want to have a snack and then put your shoes on"
When you give them two choices, they feel that they're in control but still make a choice that is ultimately what you want them to do.
You can also make one of the choices something negative, such as, " Put on your shoes or sit in time out" Most likely she'll pick the positive choice. And make sure she knows if she doesn't make a choice she'll be in trouble and you'll be making the choice for her. Be sure and FOLLOW THROUGH with whatever you do.
If she continues to have a tantrum, walk away. Remind her of her choices and walk away. Give her a time to make her choice before you're making the choice for her.
If you stick with it, it will work.
Good luck
2007-02-18 17:54:35 · answer #7 · answered by rtlsimpson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm going to continue to use this answer even tho it sounds crazy. The Dog Whisperer on TV actually teaches a lot of parenting skills just by watching what he does. Sounds crazy, but I've been an elem .teacher for 25 years, and I think the simplicity of it and the removal of the fact that is a dog instead of a child, somehow lets it sink in. Give it a try. But defnitely don't give in. have you tried offering her choices ? Lots of kids like this like choices because it makes them feel in control or powerful for their age.
2007-02-18 18:50:21 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she tantrums, ignore her, she does it to get attention so the more you give in, the more she will do it because she knows it will make you act.
2007-02-18 22:44:18 · answer #9 · answered by Notherenow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give her time outs ..like make her go to her room or have a chair to sit her in ..time out should only be the same about of time at there age like a 2yr old ..they have 2 minute time outs .. spanking just shows them its ok to hit others .. it does not work!!
2007-02-18 17:01:10 · answer #10 · answered by jessicadavid p 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋