wedding question?

Question

my step daughter announced to her dad that she wanted him and
her step dad to give her away at her upcoming wedding.
her dad has been a big part of her life regardless of the divorce,
and she never liked her step dad growing up? It was just recently she started liking him and her step-brother. Her dad is
devistated by this choice and does not want to share this priveledge. I could use some advice? Help?
Also
I offered a wedding shower to be given by my freinds now I don't want them to give it . I am very upset for him.
What is right since I already offered it?

Help Help?

Answer 1

He should be proud to walk down the aisle with her. Even if the step dad is walking her down with him.

Answer 2

Offering & then backing out is a bad idea. I think it would really hurt feelings. I know your & her fathers feelings are hurt, but 2 wrongs don't make a right.

And I'm sorry your husband is upset, along with you, about her choice. But at the end of the day, while he's been active in her life despite a divorce, her stepfather also had a role in raising her & she obviously has some attachment to him as well. I'm guessing this was hard for her, too, she didn't want to "chose" between which man in her life should walk her down the aisle. I think sharing the priveledge is better than not have the priveledge at all.

Answer 3

No, you can not cancel the shower - you may not agree with her decision, but she is an adult and you don't get to "punish" her when you don't like her choice. That would be very childish and obviously, someone needs to show her that being adult is aobut more then just doing whatever you want.

As for the dad thing - it is insensitive of her, but again, it is her choice. Her dad shoudl talk to her about it calming, about allow her to make the final decision. It would be very sad if he choose not to do it all because he doesn't want to share it. He only gets one chance - and being there with the step dad will be a better memory then not being there at all.

Answer 4

i understand this is a big moment in a fathers life, and you may have a way to fix it a bit, yes go on-with the bridle party, it will give you a chance to sit down with her,and find out why she made this choice,and to let her know she kinda hurt her dads feelings,but if she already asked her step father, she cant go back-and say forget it, Ive changed my mind, but maybe you can make it easy for her to apologies to her dad,maybe her step-dad made an impression on her life that you are unaware of-and she wanted hI'm included, im sure the both of them are grown up enough to pull this off in good taste for there daughter, i had my step father give me away,and i didn't even include my dad, but i really dint think she was out to hurt her dad, i think she just cared more about her step-dad than anyone knew, and wanted I'm to be part of it,her father will get over this if he's any kind of a man.just talk to her and find out-it'll work out and be beautiful, i know it, have faith and fun,and congratulations to your family!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 5

It's your step-daughters wedding so it's her choice who she wants to give her away. Either dad could say no. That's their choice.

Since you already offered for a wedding shower to be provided, you should go through with it and put your differences aside. This is her day, her choice. Not yours.

If your step-daughter is happy, isn't that all that really matters?

Answer 6

I can understand why your husband is upset, but it is your step daughters wedding. Has the bride considered having her step father walk her down the first half of the aisle, and have her father walk her down the 2nd half, and actually be the one to give her away? I have seen this done, and it has worked out fine. Of course the step father would be in the receiving line.

Answer 7

i choose greater of a backyard style wedding ceremony... like at an incredibly superb southern plantation, have the marriage cerimony interior the interior mid-day, with the reception outdoors interior the night while it cools down. i choose chinese language (or is it jap?) lantern-esque lighting fixtures with yellow roses and accents of orange with the considerable color being white. in basic terms some human beings from the two facets of the family individuals (like 15-25 each and each). and the nutrition would be set up like an elegant buffet. thats all i've got been given so some distance, yet i think of it's going to be the appropriate wedding ceremony for me (if my destiny husband likes it too).

Answer 8

Tell all the Adults to "grow up". Sounds like this young lady is more advanced in maturity than some of the older folks.

Bless the children who grow up to want to be closer to the whole family. You keep doing the right thing!!, forget the others, and you will feel good about yourself. Don't let yourself get trapped into their small mindedness of ego. Be a lady and help this young lady make her day special. After all, it is only one day. Stay with your plans.

Answer 9

My niece had both her dad ( my brother) and her step dad to walk her down the aisle, one on each arm. It was so beautiful and it made everyone happy to be included. I always say you can never have too many people love you. Good luck!!!!!!!

Answer 10

Well if you are the step dad then tell her how flattered you are that she asked you but you are going to step down to let her dad have the pleasure since it is so important to him. Just let her know you are touched but she needs to realize this is so important to her dad and he deserves to walk her alone.