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i taught her on how things should be done when she was younger she seemed to understand and follow but now it's different what should i do???

2007-02-18 11:45:06 · 18 answers · asked by chelsea smith 1 in Family & Relationships Family

18 answers

sounds like you are the one loosing control. YOU are the parent

2007-02-18 11:53:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Step one pray (if that's something you do). Get a hold of a LOT OF PATIENCE! Take a day for you and your daughter and go some where you both can talk. But the trick here is YOU MUST LISTEN NO MATTER WHAT SHE SAYS. Keep yourself together (later you can cry,yell or scream into a pillow!). Try to see things the way she sees them ask her what is upsetting her at home and school. Find out if someone or something is bothering her. She is going through puberty and has all these feelings and she doesn't know how to express it. She's not a baby and she's not an adult yet. Kids at her age in school are changing. The friends she once had are probably acting different and she doesn't like it and/or understand it. If you took her out on a school day and go out have breakfast or lunch whatever, go to a mall anywhere (ask her to suggest a place). Giving a day to herself with you will show her that not only do you love her but that she is important and matters.(This works well with sons too!). If your able to do it hope you guys have fun! Remember to give her a hug and tell her how much you enjoyed spending the day with her!

2007-02-18 12:01:32 · answer #2 · answered by rencar32002 4 · 0 0

at the beginning, i'm no longer a parent or some infant expert or something. i'm a young person, yet it incredibly is my suggestion. i'd communicate together with her. take a seat, do no longer yell and attempt to no longer argue. only gently communicate over together with her, and attempt and locate out why she's doing those issues. floor her for regardless of time you think of is very nicely, yet do no longer make it super unfair. only clarify why you're grounding her. She broke the policies, she would be in a position to pay for her strikes. Then make a compromise with the makeup ingredient while she's calmed down and behaving. rather of wearing a great number of black, caked on makeup, purchase her some sparkling mascara and brown eyeliner. it will look greater organic. certainly, makeup isn't a huge deal. She does not prefer it, regardless of the undeniable fact that it is going to help her experience greater advantageous. verify you teach her the thank you to prepare it, too, and get a sturdy makeup remover so she washes it off each evening in the past mattress. possibly you need to use it as an award for sturdy habit. If she is going 3 weeks devoid of breaking the policies, purchase her some particularly eyeshadows or some thing (no longer something too formidable). only attempt and gently bypass approximately this. yet bear in concepts, if she does not save on with the policies, you're able to discipline. do no longer enable her harm out with each little thing like some father and mom.

2016-11-23 17:29:18 · answer #3 · answered by nadem 4 · 0 0

Well, you have only finished half of the job. She will be a teenager and is a preteen right now. Being a baby 1-11 years old is alot different. You develop different feelings and begin to want independance.which is only a natural instinct. There are better ways of going about it, but since they are still young they do not know how else to be grown, but to rebell, which is wrong. Sit down with her and talk. COMUNICATION IS THE KEY.

2007-02-18 11:51:40 · answer #4 · answered by All Of the Above 5 · 1 0

It's normal for children to rebel when they hit the double digits. Girls seem to rebel at a younger age then boys. Make sure that she isn't doing drugs or hanging out with people who are. If you think she may get too out of control PLEASE PLEASE for her sake don't be afraid to get help. There are a lot of places to look. I would guess that she doesn't really need a psychologist. Try looking for groups that help young people that are going through the problems that she is going through. I bet boys are a big part of it now too. Just don't give in. She is too young to be too into boys and she has plenty of time. Don't give up on her and don't give in to her when you know better than her. Your the mom. You are still responsible for her. I don't know if I helped any. I hope I have. Also, know that I have prayed for you and don't forget to pray yourself.

2007-02-18 11:59:01 · answer #5 · answered by kikigeorgie 1 · 0 0

This is coming from a 13 year old boy's viewpoint. Your daughter is maturing and becoming more independent. She wants to be left alone and her emotions are flowing rapidly. Her hormones are raging right now and it is confusing to balance school, family, friends and other important aspects of life. Make sure that the rebellion doesn't go to far, but let her have her freedom. If the rebellion goes way to far, then consult a family conselour. Good luck with your daughter!

2007-02-18 11:52:40 · answer #6 · answered by mcvcm92 5 · 2 0

12 years old, isn't that middle school aged? That age has got to be one of the toughest ages for kids....the kids in middle school are MEAN, the peer pressure is HIGH....sweet kids become BRATS. Perhaps you should tell her that she needs to straighten up her attitude, talk and act respectfully or you will home school her. I think a lot has to do with her peers....also, hormones are raging, which doesn't help. You've had years to learn how to cope with your up and down hormones, and she's still learning how to deal with it...This is also the age in which many girls who had great social skills and self-confidence begin to have self-esteem issues, so pay attention, remember that while you are working on her Brattiness, to be sure and continue with the positive praise and love. She will need it.

2007-02-18 11:53:19 · answer #7 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0 0

You need to establish who is the parent and who is the child. Honestly, at 12 years old she is old enough were you could give her a quick smack across the face. Not child abuse, but a stern and quick hit. She needs to learn to respect you and your rules. That may be harsh, but it will make her up to realize that you are not going to take any of her crap. You need to beat this before she gets any worse.

She is going through puberty and her behavior will be bratty and mean. But, you have to make sure it's just a phase. You don't want her to begin rebelling at school, hanging out with the wrong kind of kids, or getting herself into bad trouble (drugs, boys, etc). Establish a firm role as the parent, and then communicate her feelings and frustration's. Don't try to be her friend, but don't be overbearing. Establish boundaries.

2007-02-18 11:56:09 · answer #8 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1 1

You're going to have to sit down with her and work out what is going on, but I would think that puberty has a lot to deal with it. Common ground and flexibility is what is required. You need to be able to talk with her and ask her why she wants to do X or Y and then come to a compromise. The first hurdle will be very difficult, but once there is more understanding, things will come a lot easier. I know that it's difficult - been there myself.

2007-02-18 11:52:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Continue on the way you began. Consistency is the best way to handle rebellious teens. She's testing you...and boy, will you be tested...

Remember to tell her that you care, but don't give in because that seems to be easier than battling with her.

Once you say no, mean it. Don't waver.

If you stay the same each time, she'll feel protected even though she is going to tell you that none of the other parents are as strict as you are. Don't let that sway you. She is yours to protect.

Hang in there.

2007-02-18 11:50:04 · answer #10 · answered by Blue 6 · 0 0

here's something i found out.
the more you restrict children...the more the rebel. no. i'm not a mom or anything. but my best friend isn't allowed to do anything. and i mean ANYTHING. so since she doesn't have any freedom to be her own person, she's struggeling even more to be different. so now she secretely has a boyfriend and is cutting.

so maybe be less strict on your little girl, but also set boundaries. let her share her opinion, but just because she shared it, doesn't mean you have to agree. so don't get too stressed. just be on your guard. goodluck♥

2007-02-18 11:53:23 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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