what do I do?how do i get her back??

Question

ok I have been with my girlfrined for 7 mo now and i messed up the other day and lied to her 4 the 1st time.I felt as if something was wrong my gut was telling me something was not right. I asked her and she said she was ok other then a few things she was stressed out about family,school.etc. but nothing else.Well i did not feel as if that were the truth. awhile ago we had broken up for a few weeks because of the same thing,said she was going threw so many things she just needed a break. well during that break her x boy frend was textn her and calling her. She was honest with me she came right out and told me.I said ok take ur time figure out where u are and I will be here , I love uand care about u my door is always open.So she came back and we were fine.i felt something was wrong so i looked in her phone and i seen that her n her x were talking again.I aksd her and she said it was nothing then she asked me how i kenw.i lied and told her someone told me.she found out n we broke up.

Answer 1

you tell her you are sorry for lying and invading her but you were just worried about her... say you love her so muchand just wanted her to be happy and you wanted her to feel safe. say your not mad or anything... but i gotta say if she flipped out at you and you broke up she might be hiding something. the defence seems a bit too much for 'nothing'... after you patch your side up you should ask her why they were messaging... say you wanna know so you can protect her... good luck

Answer 2

Hi, well honesty is the best policy. Now the lie you told wasn't to shabby but next time just be honest with her okay, because when you tell just a little lie it eats you up inside. Okay now with her talking to her x I don't think that's cool but what I do think is cool is how respectful you were about it and telling her how you felt about her and that your door was always opened, right on! Now with you seeing that they were talking/ texting you should just tell her the truth about how you found out. I mean why lie about that ya know, why so that you can get hurt, no for real what you need to do is ask her if she thinks that she may go back with him or is there something left for the both of you. Just ask her to be honest with you. If you don't do this and mean what your asking her than be prepared in the end to be heartbroken.

Just keep your head up and be strong, sounds like you really love her, so don't give up unless that's what she wants.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Well first things first when you took her cell phone and saw those txt messages you should of never confronted her about it without stating the fact that you took her cell phone. This there is showing that you dont trust her. THis also shows that you cant be trusted either since you lied to her about the whole issue. In order to have a healty realtionship you both have to be honest to eachother and the minute you start lying and doing things behind eachothers back thats when the big red flag is telling you that something is wrong. THe breakup was gonna happen no matter what .... it was coming and you both know it. I suggest you both start fresh (if you both want too work things out) and next time make sure your more honest with eachother. Appologise first and then tell her you want to work things out with her and your srry..... Tell her that you want to be with her and you care so much about her... tell her your srry you never trusted her and you were wrong to not trust her..... tell her that you want a fresh start and inorder for that to happen and work you both need to be honest with each other.... It will definalty work if both of you are willing to make it work..

Best of wishes kesha

Answer 4

You need to make things right. Think of a nice and quiet place to meet to say sorry and talk things over. It was probably an accident and you didn't mean to lie in the first place. Tell her what you have to say. Try to make things right. My boyfriend did the same thing with me and now we're together again. This is useful advice and you should consider trying it. Buy her a small "will you forgive me" kind of present. Maybe she'll accept your apology.

Answer 5

The fact that you looked in her phone probably wasn't the best thing to do, as it shows that you do not trust her but on the other hand;

I think she is contradicting herself a little bit and should be fairer to you because she was the one who was texting her ex boyfriend and you had every right to wonder why....

i think she should look at the bigger picture and take a look at herself, and then she'll figure out that you are not the only one who wronged.

Answer 6

Well, I am going through a sort of similar situation and it seems telling her the door is always open is not the best thing to do...At least that is what people are telling me...She is keeping you hanging on, I do believe...Just tell her how you feel about all this and talk to her. Sorry if this doesn't help!

Answer 7

I don't think what you did is wrong. well sort of. she obviously still has feelings for her ex hence the comunication, do you want to play second fiddle?? Find yourself a girl without attachments and dramas unless you like that kinda thing, and want to take her back. What is she continues to talk to her ex, do you want to be a "man dormat". If your o.k with that then go ahead and ask her back, Good luck.

Answer 8

Just tell her the truth if you want her back. She should understand, even though it doesn't say much about the two of you having re-established trust. If you had, you wouldn't need to check. But your gut instinct served you, and if she loves you, she should understand and validate your concern.
If you want her back, it's the only way.

Answer 9

Your intuition is always right...follow your gut instincts...if she can't let go of her ex and you can't trust her (big key right there), then she's not for you. Once she swallows that key, that lock is never going to open again.

I think you'll be better off without her...as they say, there's always plenty of fish in the sea ;)

Answer 10

Take her to the side and put everything on the table. Tell her that talking to her ex bothers you. Let her say what bothers her and only in time can you make it work. You have to work on trusting and communicating with eachother.