I was molested when i was 12 years old. that was 4 years ago. My cousin did it on new years eve. I'm scared to tell anybody but i know it's the right thing to do since he has a 5 year old daughter. But my problem is that i'm scared he doesn't remember he did it and and i don't want people to not belive me. Plus my family is close and i don't want to ruin everything. Please tell me how i should tell someone iwas molested. Thanks
2007-02-18 09:34:00 · 16 answers · asked by jenna w 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You WILL ruin "everything". Everything will never be the same again for your family. Sometimes things are just better left alone.....what good would come from stirring it up NOW, after 4 years??
I would suggest that you talk with HIM about it. He may be sorry for it and have learned his "lesson".....you'll know by talking to him, and it may help you understand things. Good luck.
2007-02-18 09:40:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Trust me, the ---hole remembers, and you have the repsonsibility to make sure he doesn't do it to someone else.
I know it is hard...I 've been there...but you need to tell the mother of the baby, and probably the grandparents so that they can keep a close eye on his behavior and keep his alone time with this child or any child to a minimum.
The bad this is that the statute of limitations in most states is only 4 years or so. So there may be no way for the law to do anythign about him unless he does it again, but if he'll molest a very young family member then he is a threat to any child.
2007-02-18 09:39:39 · answer #2 · answered by ExperienceD 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My ex husband had molested his half sister for many years when she was a little girl. She wrote me a letter a few weeks after our daughter was born because she was worried her brother would hurt the baby. I'm glad she told me so I could keep an eye on her a little more closely. We ended up getting a divorce later. If you think the 5 year old is in danger, then it may be a good idea to write a letter to the mother, as a suggestion. Good luck.
2007-02-18 09:43:24 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very important you let your family know that this person is the kind of person who has, can, and will molest a child. Find an adult in your family close to you that you trust, and just tell them the truth flat-out. They will be able to help you. They'll know better on where to take it from there.
As for ruining anything for your family, YOU won't be causing any trouble, it's your cousin that has caused the trouble. I know it's hard, but you have to tell someone. What if this is happening to his daughter??
2007-02-18 09:42:33 · answer #4 · answered by mich 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG..he has a daughter now ?? Listen, tell that mother NOW.
She needs to know what happened, so she can protect her own
children. Tell her to talk to him..and that you all are willing to
keep it amoungst yourselves. But if his children or any other are
molested..he will be arrested. And the family will know. That
might make him think...but, it is better to not tell the whole family
because it WILL cause a rift. For now...tell her only. He is the
least of your concerns. Protecting those kids are more
important. When you are older, you will know u did the right
thing. You did YOUR part...the rest depends on her and him.
2007-02-18 09:45:30 · answer #5 · answered by CraZyCaT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that kinda thing happened to you you have to tell other wise your just helping it alone to happen again what happens if that little girl grows up? Listen if you tell your parents Im sure that they will belive you your their daughter after all and if they ask you why you didnt say anything sooner well trust me that one will come along with the family fighting but it is the right thing to do becuase you really dont want it to happen again do you? So tell your parents
2007-02-18 09:39:15 · answer #6 · answered by Rachael 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would find a family member or close friend that I trust to listen to me and I would explain what happened. From begining to end. I know when I told no one believe me at first but I kept telling until I found someone to listen. Most importantly get counseling it will guide you in the way you should handle this.
2007-02-18 09:42:09 · answer #7 · answered by ONLY 1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being molested is a very serious thing. It is very unlikly that no one will believe you, but if they dont you can always go to the police. but tell your parents first. It will not pull apart your family. It may seem like it for a while but eventually everything will be normal abaig. THE NOST IMPORTANT THING IS TO TELL SOMEONE FOR YOUR OWN SAFTY AND THE COUSINS DAUGHTERS SAFTY.
2007-02-18 10:59:21 · answer #8 · answered by Becca 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been where you are at..and in my day...nobody told...PLEASE RUN TO THE NEAREST PERSON YOU CAN TRUST AND TELL!!!!!!!!Please, if you can`t tell your family..talk to your church or school councillor or even the police..it will be hard to do but you have to. Do not believe that he DOESN`T remember it..oh yes he does...people don`t get drunk and molest children and NOT remember it..i beg of you to tell or you will letting him get away with it..and as you said..he has a daughter!! if you can`t help yourself..u must help her
2007-02-18 09:45:57 · answer #9 · answered by heather h 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my family is really close too, but it wasn't a family meber who did it to me. after it happened to me, i just kinda snuck it into a conversation and my family picked at the subject untill they got the whole story. I tell ya my brothers were pissed, and ended up beating the S**t outa this guy. so thats all i got for ya.
2007-02-18 09:39:51 · answer #10 · answered by emily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋