This is my daughter's account, but I am going to use it as I don't have my own account. My daughter and her husband got married last may and he was working at hardee's making 200 every two weeks, so i told them that since me and my husband couldn't take care of ourselves, they could live with us for 100 dollars a month if they took care of us. Everything was fine until he got on at the fire department and started making more money. Then he changed in every way, not just to me, but to my daughter too. And then I decided that since he was making more money he could pay 200 a month and help with groceries. Everything was fine there until my husband had another stroke. Now they want to move out. Am I wrong for being angry about it? I feel like they used me for a place to live and now that it's harder they want to abandon me.
2007-02-18 07:55:10 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
they didnt take advantage of you, you said right in the letter that you told them they could move in, you offered!! and i commend you for that, and you state that he was working at hardees and only making 200 every two weeks, so this would lead me to believe that they are a young couple, you should be happy that he has taken steps to better his life and your dauhters life, now it is time for them to get out on their own and start their own lives, but that does not mean that they should move away and forget about you!! my in-laws let me and my wife live with them in the begining, and it is one thing for a parent to take back in their kids but to take in there spouse is not something every parent would do, so I will always be very grateful to them for that and they know it. so I do believe he owes you some respect and if it were me i would continue to help out as much as posible, and I believe he should to. I think some of the stress you are feeling and blameing them for, is just because you are in such a bind and feeling tired and woren out, and probley just want someone to take care of you for a while, and that is natural everyone needs to feel loved and feel like they matter and we all need some special atteion paid to us, and with your husband in the condition he is in you don't get any of that I'm sure, maybe you could get them to watch your husband for a weekend and take off and check into a hotel go to a spa, get a massage and just baby yourself for a weekend!!
2007-02-18 08:36:05 · answer #1 · answered by Sir Hard & Thick 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're being selfish. Your daughter and new husband need to start their new lives together (away from "mommy and daddy"). She isn't abandoning you, YOU are abandoning HER at this very special time in her life. Couldn't you be there for her and congradulate her? You must have done a good job in raising her, she married a good man who is going to provide for her. And I am sure he loves her very much, and doesnt want to see her being used by a selfish Mom. If he has changed, it's only because he's fed up with living with his inlaws. He needs to spread his wings too.
2007-02-18 16:04:56 · answer #2 · answered by 2Bme 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You were wrong in asking them to move in and take care of you!! Young adults need to take care of THEMSELVES! And to learn how to live on what they make! If you had no other resources, you should have applied for Welfare, or Medicaid and/or move into a nursing home if you were unable to take care of yourselves!! I know that sometimes there is no other answer--but it sounds as if you weren't up against a brick wall! Parents need to stay out of their children's lives--until they ask for help/talk with you re their situations. They sound very young and have a lot of growing up to do! Without your help! You may just have been lonely for her--but we can't feed our own needs from our children!!
2007-02-18 16:43:08 · answer #3 · answered by Martell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I would totally feel betrayed if I were you. You were a loving place for them when they needed it the most and now you need a loving place and they are trying to abandon you! Maybe you could tell them about this. Good luck and God bless!
2007-02-18 16:13:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Daughter, ans Son-in-Law, aren't Grown-ups. They're all about themselves. Most Younger Kids are. If you try to fight `em/ They'll revolt, even worse. I'd vote to let 1`em see Life is. Once they see how rough, it really is? She'll be back with apologizes. But make her learn a lesson. Blood is gotta be thicker than Water. Good Luck. My Sympathies on your Husband's Condition. Prayers are on their way!
2007-02-18 16:03:27 · answer #5 · answered by Goggles 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you shouldn't feel wrong about it and in my opinion you need time to talk to your daughter and her husband.
you may think about getting profesional help as it will help and be better off in the long run.
it could also be inocent because your husbands / her father had a stroke
but i think you should start by speaking up.
2007-02-18 16:04:30 · answer #6 · answered by wizard_man130 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can see your point of view. They did use you until they were ready to move out. From their point of view they probably think that you were helping them out and they don't need it anymore. Either way, it is their life. I would talk to them about it.
2007-02-18 16:08:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're mad because they want to move out and start their own life?
Yes you are wrong to be mad. They stayed at your place but paid you what you stipulated.
2007-02-18 16:04:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋