hi
i am really desperate for an advice
i am 21 weeks pregnant and i am married.
my last mense was the 1st week of october 2006 and i had one night stand with an x boyfriend on the 9 october 06.throughout september and october i have been sleeping with my hubby.i discovered my pregnancy on the 29 oct 06 and the doc said i am around 4 weeks pregnant.
now the question,what should i do next?????
how can i check whose baby am i carrying???
is there any test???
what can i do without having to tell my hubby?????
will he get to know???
if this is not his, should i go for an abortion.
all i know right now, i don want to lose my hubby
please do reply!!!!
thanks a zillion
2007-02-18 03:01:54 · 12 answers · asked by ikin_babyput 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
The truth is the best.
Get a DNA test when the babe is born, just pull your doc aside and tell him confidentally. (DNA tests really just involve swabing your mouth with cotton, no needles, I SWEAR.)
I would say it propably is your ex's babe, but just explain the situation to your hubby, apologize about a zillion times, and ask if he can still love the baby.
Don't get an abortion for this. I'm not a freaky pro-life, but if your hubby can't realize EVRYONE makes mistakes, then he just sucks. No offense or nothing.
-Tizzzzy
2007-02-18 03:08:44 · answer #1 · answered by serenityfan76 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow... another exciting installment of "Who my baby daddy?" If you didn't want to lose your husband why, oh, why did you cheat on him? Did the other guy have a gun to your head? Personally I think you need to come clean and be honest with your husband. A marriage based in lies is not a very good marriage. Also the only way to establish paternity is by waiting for the baby to be born and doing a dna test. No you should not get an abortion, you made your bed, now lay in it. Why does everyone these days not take their wedding vows seriously?
2007-02-18 11:37:08 · answer #2 · answered by autumnofserenity@sbcglobal.net 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In regards to your very first question, the only father we have is God. The DAD is the person your refering to. No you shouldnt have an abortion that is murdering an innocent child whose mother just happened to make a huge mistake. Yes you should tell your husband, it is selfish of you to lead him to beleive the baby is 100 % his. All you can do is get a paternity test done which will may or may not involve your husband, try the one night stand guy first. If it is not his than it is your husbands. You have a right to be stressing but tone it down some for the sake of the child.
2007-02-18 11:16:50 · answer #3 · answered by charityislove 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
cheating is not good for anyone to do first of all. You are in a bad situation. I do not recommend abortion! That is wrong! I however know that you can have a test done to see who the father is. Have you told your ex boyfriend this? Obviously you haven't been honest with your husband yet. You need to do that regardless of what happens. If you dont' then you are again deceiving him and he has every right to know this baby might not be his. I think it is your hubbies baby from the dates however I could be wrong. Good luck!
2007-02-18 11:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by MOM OF ONE 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The dates are too close to say who is the father. It really could be either. You can have a paternity test done in late pregnancy or right after the baby is born. Abortion is illegal at this point so that isn't an option.
2007-02-18 11:08:24 · answer #5 · answered by jilldaniel_wv 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, don't be so stupid and impulsive. You can't get an abortion at 21 wks. You are too far along, and how selfish and cruel can you be? I think that paternity can be checked doing an amniocentesis, but I don't know how you could do it without your hubby finding out. Hopefully it was only a one time thing. Not that it would excuse what you've done. Maybe you could go on Jerry Springer.
2007-02-18 11:07:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
so I'm guessing your husband doesn't know you're pregnant. he's gonna be mad that you haven't told him yet... and he's gonna ask you why you haven't told him yet. your answer? my suggestion would be the truth. unless, once the baby is born, you can sneak a swab into his mouth for a DNA test... you're going to wonder forever who's baby this is if you don't come clean. you have to tell him you're pregnant. it looks like it could really go either way with the dates you gave. if you didn't have sex with your husband in the first half of October, it's definitely your ex's baby. good luck. you're in a bad spot. i hope your husband can be understanding and not leave you while you're pregnant.
2007-02-18 11:16:35 · answer #7 · answered by Emily H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is too late for an abortion, and I happen to be steadfastly pro-choice.
What you should do next is to come clean to you husband. He's going to find out at some point that you cheated on him, so the sooner that you tell him, the better.
Further, you need to figure out for yourself why you cheated on him. That's going to take a lot of work on your part. And the two of you will need couples counseling to get through this together. It's your only hope at saving your marriage.
You created this situation and you are the only one who can fix it.
2007-02-18 11:16:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well first off maybe you wouldnt have this problem if you wouoldnt have cheated on your HUSBAND!!! second how selfish of you. that is your baby.. you cant get an abortion it was your mistake not the baby'ss plus ur too far a long. there is no trest that i know of until the baby is born you can get paternitity test. And how are you not going to tell ur husband he deserves to know...
2007-02-18 12:02:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really should be thinking about how you don't want to lose your BABY, not your husband. That's really selfish of you. Your child did nothing wrong in this matter. Why would it have to suffer?
2007-02-18 11:06:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋